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ngravitt
04-12-2014, 11:27 AM
Hello everyone,
I am a university student who struggles with severe anxiety. I have been dealing with this for as far back as I can remember, but having recently been assigned by my Spanish and Chinese teachers the task of delivering a 5-minute presentation in each class, both in front of all my classmates, is what spurred me to find some kind of support. Although I can usually manage small talk with a stranger, just the idea of speaking--in another language, mind you--in front of a group of people is enough to give me a panic attack. In fact, I never raise my hand in class, even when I have the right answer. I love learning foreign languages, but I have almost convinced myself that studying them is not worth the pain of speaking in front of people. Part of my fear is fueled by my belief that people generally do not want to be nice. Paired with an extreme lack of self-confidence, my negative view of others makes me nearly incapable to function in front of people.

Throughout middle school and high school I was teased and bullied, but I thought that college students would have reached a level of maturity that would make them easier to work with. However, in my Spanish class, there is a woman whose native language is Spanish. She makes negative comments about our classmates' ability to speak in her native tongue, and thus I keep thinking of her criticizing me and laughing the entire time I am delivering my speech. I hate to let someone have this much power over me, but I can't make it stop. I want to learn from this experience so that I will be able to ignore people like her in the future, given the fact that it is inevitable that there will be more like her.Furthermore, my Chinese teacher informed me after I won a scholarship to fund a study abroad program in China that I will be required to deliver five presentations in front of people I will have never met before. Just thinking about it makes my whole body go numb.

The things I have mentioned so far are things that might make anyone feel anxious. At my lowest moments, however, I can't muster up enough courage even to approach a professor with an important question I have about our homework or class discussions; I avoid going to public places at busy times of day (i.e. I don't go to Wal-Mart on the weekends--especially Sunday--or at any point before 11:00 P.M. on any weekday); I have avoided going to large social gatherings. I'm sure you get the point.

I apologize for dumping all of that into my introduction, but I want to go ahead and get it out. Now, can anyone offer any advice on how to deal with my Spanish classmate? If it were you, how would you get through class without fearing what she says? And how would you prepare to deliver a speech in front of a bunch of strangers? What about getting through everyday tasks, such as going into a crowded shopping center? In the past, I have used pharmaceutical drugs such as klonopin(sp?) and valium, but they only made me sleepy and drunk. More recently, I have found that natural alternatives such as L-theanine, Bacopa, magnesium, and a blend of other herbal supplements work fairly well, but there is no guarantee that they will suppress a major anxiety attack. Although I workout five days a week to increase serotonin, eat healthy, and have great health otherwise, I cannot make the panic attacks go away. Thanks to all who take the time to read and respond.

needtogetwell
04-13-2014, 04:16 AM
Hello everyone, I am a university student who struggles with severe anxiety. I have been dealing with this for as far back as I can remember, but having recently been assigned by my Spanish and Chinese teachers the task of delivering a 5-minute presentation in each class, both in front of all my classmates, is what spurred me to find some kind of support. Although I can usually manage small talk with a stranger, just the idea of speaking--in another language, mind you--in front of a group of people is enough to give me a panic attack. In fact, I never raise my hand in class, even when I have the right answer. I love learning foreign languages, but I have almost convinced myself that studying them is not worth the pain of speaking in front of people. Part of my fear is fueled by my belief that people generally do not want to be nice. Paired with an extreme lack of self-confidence, my negative view of others makes me nearly incapable to function in front of people. Throughout middle school and high school I was teased and bullied, but I thought that college students would have reached a level of maturity that would make them easier to work with. However, in my Spanish class, there is a woman whose native language is Spanish. She makes negative comments about our classmates' ability to speak in her native tongue, and thus I keep thinking of her criticizing me and laughing the entire time I am delivering my speech. I hate to let someone have this much power over me, but I can't make it stop. I want to learn from this experience so that I will be able to ignore people like her in the future, given the fact that it is inevitable that there will be more like her.Furthermore, my Chinese teacher informed me after I won a scholarship to fund a study abroad program in China that I will be required to deliver five presentations in front of people I will have never met before. Just thinking about it makes my whole body go numb. The things I have mentioned so far are things that might make anyone feel anxious. At my lowest moments, however, I can't muster up enough courage even to approach a professor with an important question I have about our homework or class discussions; I avoid going to public places at busy times of day (i.e. I don't go to Wal-Mart on the weekends--especially Sunday--or at any point before 11:00 P.M. on any weekday); I have avoided going to large social gatherings. I'm sure you get the point. I apologize for dumping all of that into my introduction, but I want to go ahead and get it out. Now, can anyone offer any advice on how to deal with my Spanish classmate? If it were you, how would you get through class without fearing what she says? And how would you prepare to deliver a speech in front of a bunch of strangers? What about getting through everyday tasks, such as going into a crowded shopping center? In the past, I have used pharmaceutical drugs such as klonopin(sp?) and valium, but they only made me sleepy and drunk. More recently, I have found that natural alternatives such as L-theanine, Bacopa, magnesium, and a blend of other herbal supplements work fairly well, but there is no guarantee that they will suppress a major anxiety attack. Although I workout five days a week to increase serotonin, eat healthy, and have great health otherwise, I cannot make the panic attacks go away. Thanks to all who take the time to read and respond.

Welcome ngeavitt!

You've come to a good place here.

If I could offer 2 suggestions.
1. Try to work on living in the present. Trying to predict how people will react to you, is just going to fuel your anxiety. Your thoughts and images you create in your mind will rarely reflect reality and will only cause more anxiety and cost you the opportunity to work on the new languages you are learning. It will also cost you the opportunity to meet some really nice fabulous people.

2. The woman in your class that is upsetting you. For starters, why do you place any value on what she says? She is obviously not in the class for the same reasons as you. You want to learn something new, expand your horizons. A very positive reason. She on the other hand wants an easy credit. Do your best to ignore her. Her comments have no value, don't give her the power to ruin your day!

Both of my suggestions are not easy but if you can do it you will get a hold on your anxiety.

Good luck!
Pam

jangar
04-13-2014, 01:23 PM
Kudos to you for getting in touch with the Anxiety Forums. I can completely understand you when you get most anxiety in front of your classmates. I even get so much anxiety at church (where one would think it would be safe from evil anxiety) when I have to walk up to the alter and receive communion and better yet get a sip of wine (you have to hold the goblet to get a sip) and I am TERRIFIED that I will drop it or fall down in front of everyone. I just started recently have been going on these forums (anxiety, agoraphobia and Social Anxiety - which sounds like you may well as have social anxiety). I find that the feedback that these wonderful people with the same disability as I have just in that relieves my anxiety knowing that others are out there suffering like me and extend their kind hearts and encouraging words to help people like you and me. Remember - if it's goning be, it's up to me/you (easier said that done LOL). Thank's for sharing your story!

ngravitt
04-19-2014, 03:35 PM
Thank you both for your heartfelt responses.
needtogetwell, everything you wrote in your post is absolutely correct. My goal is to enjoy every moment for all it's worth--I don't want to look back on my life with regret that I let fear steal all of my joy in life.
jangar, it's nice to know that someone can relate to my struggles. Knowing there is someone out there who relates to me makes me feel less alienated from society! In fact, for all I know, each of my classmates may be just as nervous to give his/her speech as I am, and the same goes for your fellow church members who have to approach the altar.
My desire is to learn to think logically during every situation; however, when the "fight or flight" survival response (either run away from a situtation or react negatively) is triggered in me, my fear is like a giant muscular guy beating down the skinny little wimp that is my rationality and courage.
Thank you all again for your responses. By the way, I apologize for not responding sooner. Because it is the end of my spring semester, I have a lot to do, and thus I have not had the free time to respond. I look forward to corresponding with all of you in the future.