ngravitt
04-12-2014, 11:27 AM
Hello everyone,
I am a university student who struggles with severe anxiety. I have been dealing with this for as far back as I can remember, but having recently been assigned by my Spanish and Chinese teachers the task of delivering a 5-minute presentation in each class, both in front of all my classmates, is what spurred me to find some kind of support. Although I can usually manage small talk with a stranger, just the idea of speaking--in another language, mind you--in front of a group of people is enough to give me a panic attack. In fact, I never raise my hand in class, even when I have the right answer. I love learning foreign languages, but I have almost convinced myself that studying them is not worth the pain of speaking in front of people. Part of my fear is fueled by my belief that people generally do not want to be nice. Paired with an extreme lack of self-confidence, my negative view of others makes me nearly incapable to function in front of people.
Throughout middle school and high school I was teased and bullied, but I thought that college students would have reached a level of maturity that would make them easier to work with. However, in my Spanish class, there is a woman whose native language is Spanish. She makes negative comments about our classmates' ability to speak in her native tongue, and thus I keep thinking of her criticizing me and laughing the entire time I am delivering my speech. I hate to let someone have this much power over me, but I can't make it stop. I want to learn from this experience so that I will be able to ignore people like her in the future, given the fact that it is inevitable that there will be more like her.Furthermore, my Chinese teacher informed me after I won a scholarship to fund a study abroad program in China that I will be required to deliver five presentations in front of people I will have never met before. Just thinking about it makes my whole body go numb.
The things I have mentioned so far are things that might make anyone feel anxious. At my lowest moments, however, I can't muster up enough courage even to approach a professor with an important question I have about our homework or class discussions; I avoid going to public places at busy times of day (i.e. I don't go to Wal-Mart on the weekends--especially Sunday--or at any point before 11:00 P.M. on any weekday); I have avoided going to large social gatherings. I'm sure you get the point.
I apologize for dumping all of that into my introduction, but I want to go ahead and get it out. Now, can anyone offer any advice on how to deal with my Spanish classmate? If it were you, how would you get through class without fearing what she says? And how would you prepare to deliver a speech in front of a bunch of strangers? What about getting through everyday tasks, such as going into a crowded shopping center? In the past, I have used pharmaceutical drugs such as klonopin(sp?) and valium, but they only made me sleepy and drunk. More recently, I have found that natural alternatives such as L-theanine, Bacopa, magnesium, and a blend of other herbal supplements work fairly well, but there is no guarantee that they will suppress a major anxiety attack. Although I workout five days a week to increase serotonin, eat healthy, and have great health otherwise, I cannot make the panic attacks go away. Thanks to all who take the time to read and respond.
I am a university student who struggles with severe anxiety. I have been dealing with this for as far back as I can remember, but having recently been assigned by my Spanish and Chinese teachers the task of delivering a 5-minute presentation in each class, both in front of all my classmates, is what spurred me to find some kind of support. Although I can usually manage small talk with a stranger, just the idea of speaking--in another language, mind you--in front of a group of people is enough to give me a panic attack. In fact, I never raise my hand in class, even when I have the right answer. I love learning foreign languages, but I have almost convinced myself that studying them is not worth the pain of speaking in front of people. Part of my fear is fueled by my belief that people generally do not want to be nice. Paired with an extreme lack of self-confidence, my negative view of others makes me nearly incapable to function in front of people.
Throughout middle school and high school I was teased and bullied, but I thought that college students would have reached a level of maturity that would make them easier to work with. However, in my Spanish class, there is a woman whose native language is Spanish. She makes negative comments about our classmates' ability to speak in her native tongue, and thus I keep thinking of her criticizing me and laughing the entire time I am delivering my speech. I hate to let someone have this much power over me, but I can't make it stop. I want to learn from this experience so that I will be able to ignore people like her in the future, given the fact that it is inevitable that there will be more like her.Furthermore, my Chinese teacher informed me after I won a scholarship to fund a study abroad program in China that I will be required to deliver five presentations in front of people I will have never met before. Just thinking about it makes my whole body go numb.
The things I have mentioned so far are things that might make anyone feel anxious. At my lowest moments, however, I can't muster up enough courage even to approach a professor with an important question I have about our homework or class discussions; I avoid going to public places at busy times of day (i.e. I don't go to Wal-Mart on the weekends--especially Sunday--or at any point before 11:00 P.M. on any weekday); I have avoided going to large social gatherings. I'm sure you get the point.
I apologize for dumping all of that into my introduction, but I want to go ahead and get it out. Now, can anyone offer any advice on how to deal with my Spanish classmate? If it were you, how would you get through class without fearing what she says? And how would you prepare to deliver a speech in front of a bunch of strangers? What about getting through everyday tasks, such as going into a crowded shopping center? In the past, I have used pharmaceutical drugs such as klonopin(sp?) and valium, but they only made me sleepy and drunk. More recently, I have found that natural alternatives such as L-theanine, Bacopa, magnesium, and a blend of other herbal supplements work fairly well, but there is no guarantee that they will suppress a major anxiety attack. Although I workout five days a week to increase serotonin, eat healthy, and have great health otherwise, I cannot make the panic attacks go away. Thanks to all who take the time to read and respond.