Very frustrated...

[ashy]

Sorry, I just want to get this off my chest:
I'm really frustrated and I feel really disrespected. It's frustrating that nobody understands how I feel, but most of all I hate it that no one seems to see how much hurt I'm in, but they just dismiss my thoughts and my feelings, invalidating them and making them out to be stupid or selfish. It's frustrating because I don't know how to explain how I feel or how I've been hurt. Ive always been put down, rejected, humiliated, disrespected, shamed, and treated bad with so much hate and anger that my whole family has felt towards me at one point or another in my life. It hurts. I'm scared. It has made me so anxious and fearful. But no one seems to care. I feel that they just dismiss me, or tell me that I'm the one to blame. I've apologized, I've held back anger, I've always tried my best to make peace and love and respect others. I'm trying to forgive. No one else will do the same. Even through all the anxiety and everything that I am facing I try to help others. I try to change my mood and be kind and happy for others despite the strong pull downwards from anxiety to feel and think otherwise. I wish they would have the least bit of patience with me, try to listen and understand, but they don't. They just get upset with me, annoyed with me, and act as if I don't have anything that I'm dealing with, and act like I'm the only one who has to change. I'm tired, I'm frustrated. Sometimes I just want to run as far away as possible, I want to scream. Maybe this sounds ridiculous, but sometimes I imagine that something bad happening to me, like being kidnapped or raped. Maybe I feel like that's the only way that people will start caring about me and respecting how I feel rather than invalidating it...
Sorry about the rambling, I just wanted to get it off my chest I guess. Thank you guys for being an amazing support!

[jason123]

Hey, believe when I say I know exactly what you feel to the letter. I'm always trying to convince my family the amount of pain and suffering I feel,whether I'm asleep or awake I'm fearful, irritable, I'm in dream like state, brain fog, and all out emotional distress all the time but when I tell them this they say"we have problems too" and that just makes me feel worse.Their problems can be fixed with money or new clothing or a brand new car but my problem is a little trickery to fix and they don't really understand that and it really sucks. Anxiety is one of those things that people don't consider a real problem because they think it's all in your head and that you can just turn it on and off as you please but obviously it's more complex then that lol. In anycase, please stay strong this feeling sucks but I'm sure it gets better and rest assured I know excactly what you're going through and you are not ALONE. If you have time go to youtube and search " Help with dpdr" this guy's videos helped me a lot even if you don't have dpdr it helps :))

[leetbulldog]

Hang in there. I know exactly how you feel. If you need someone to chat with I'm here for you :)

[ashy]

Hey, believe when I say I know exactly what you feel to the letter. I'm always trying to convince my family the amount of pain and suffering I feel that I'm in whether I'm asleep or awake I'm fearful, irritable, dream like state, brain fog, and all out em
It's frustrating, isn't it? I even feel that the doctors and the psychologists don't understand. It's good to know that there are others who do understand, like you. I guess people just can't really understand it unless they've been through it themselves.

[ashy]

Hang in there. I know exactly how you feel. If you need someone to chat with I'm here for you :)
Hey thank you, and you too! I just don't know what to do sometimes. I've been to counciling and it has helped me with a lot of the terrifying thoughts that I've had, but the anxiety hasn't gone away. I try everything that I possibly can to change it, I try my best with everything that I can, but I just get so overwhelmed, so exhausted and a lot of times I just feel hopeless. I'm glad that there are others like you who understand though. You keep hanging in there as well!

[ashy]

Hey, believe when I say I know exactly what you feel to the letter. I'm always trying to convince my family the amount of pain and suffering I feel,whether I'm asleep or awake I'm fearful, irritable, I'm in dream like state, brain fog, and all out emotional distress all the time but when I tell them this they say"we have problems too" and that just makes me feel worse.Their problems can be fixed with money or new clothing or a brand new car but my problem is a little trickery to fix and they don't really understand that and it really sucks. Anxiety is one of those things that people don't consider a real problem because they think it's all in your head and that you can just turn it on and off as you please but obviously it's more complex then that lol. In anycase, please stay strong this feeling sucks but I'm sure it gets better and rest assured I know excactly what you're going through and you are not ALONE. If you have time go to youtube and search " Help with dpdr" this guy's videos helped me a lot even if you don't have dpdr it helps :))

Hey, I saw you edited your post. Which video of it is it? There are quite a few of them. Thank you for your support. :)