New here and confused

[Anxietydad]

Hello,
I'm having a bit of a predicament. I know that my family loves me and that I have people that care for me and what I do. The issue is that none of them know about really who I am. They know that I have anxiety issues but don't know what I really go through. It's easy to talk about it here because no one knows me. There are days that I wonder why I'm still here, and know that it is for my daughters sake, but things come up and I have attacks that make me feel like I've got more caffeine in my system that my body is rejecting it. The only thing that makes me feel like I'm worth anything, is by making other people happy. I know that it is me just trying to feel like I'm needed. I also do what I'm passionate about when I have attacks. I have tried all kids of medications, and some work but the side effects are horrible. One loses sex drive, one loses control of bodily functions, and they just keep going. I took myself off of them thinking that maybe I can control my anxieties, and I can for the most part until something goes really wrong. That's when I jump to my electronics but I don't think that it is a good crutch to lean on. I just want to know what to do that doesn't involve medications.

[Fourteen14]

Hello, I'm having a bit of a predicament. I know that my family loves me and that I have people that care for me and what I do. The issue is that none of them know about really who I am. They know that I have anxiety issues but don't know what I really go through. It's easy to talk about it here because no one knows me. There are days that I wonder why I'm still here, and know that it is for my daughters sake, but things come up and I have attacks that make me feel like I've got more caffeine in my system that my body is rejecting it. The only thing that makes me feel like I'm worth anything, is by making other people happy. I know that it is me just trying to feel like I'm needed. I also do what I'm passionate about when I have attacks. I have tried all kids of medications, and some work but the side effects are horrible. One loses sex drive, one loses control of bodily functions, and they just keep going. I took myself off of them thinking that maybe I can control my anxieties, and I can for the most part until something goes really wrong. That's when I jump to my electronics but I don't think that it is a good crutch to lean on. I just want to know what to do that doesn't involve medications.

Hi and welcome to the forum!

Have you sought out a therapist? Sounds like this would be a starting point to get a grip on the self esteem issues.

Also have you tried the various types of natural medicines? (there are several threads relating to them).

[Anxietydad]

Hi and welcome to the forum!

Have you sought out a therapist? Sounds like this would be a starting point to get a grip on the self esteem issues.

Also have you tried the various types of natural medicines? (there are several threads relating to them).

I have had a few therapists, but it's really hard to even open to them. They aren't bad people but I just have a lot of trust issues with anyone. I haven't tried any thing natural, so I will look into that, thank you very much.

[Kadfad Harry]

Hello Anxietydad,


The only thing that makes me feel like I'm worth anything, is by making other people happy.

This is completely natural. Infact I believe this makes you more self-aware than a lot of people in our society today.

[Dahila]

Welcome to the forum :)

[Anxietydad]

Hello Anxietydad,



This is completely natural. Infact I believe this makes you more self-aware than a lot of people in our society today.

I'm pretty self aware as far as myself goes. I just live behind a blanket so people don't see the whole me. I have my own fears and hatred that I try to mask, but the problem is that since I do that I don't really know how to truly deal with things as they come up. I know that I'm not crazy as one doctor tried to put me on anti psychotics and they were to be used for bi polar disorder, but I'm not bi polar. They tried to test it with a paper that said "have you ever in your life got angry then happy suddenly?" Really hasn't everyone? I know I fear of being alone and not like by myself but have no one understand me. I hope that makes sense.