crosbykl03
04-15-2008, 07:59 PM
Im a new member that's been suffering with anxiety and panic for almost two years now. I believe what brought my anxiety on was a few different things.
Roughly six months before the anxiety and panic began, I lost someone close to me. I found myself dreaming about death and the end of the world a lot. I started to think about dying on a regular basis. A few months before that, I flew for the first time since I was a child and that completely freaked me out considering how death had become something I couldnt stop thinking about.
Finally, the night before my life became consumed with anxiety and panic, I had gone out drinking. As embarassing and shameful as it is to say, I drove myself home. The next morning when I woke up I was so worried that I may have hurt someone on my way home that I began looking online at local news websites just to make sure there hadnt been any hit and run accidents. I remember that morning my heart was beating so fast from the fear of not knowing what I could have done. But, even after I realized I had fortunately not hurt anyone, I couldnt shake the anxious feeling. My heart wouldnt slow down even into the afternoon and my chest was hurting. I ended up driving myself 30 minutes from where I was to my hometown to see a doctor because I thought I might be having heart trouble. I hate to think that I ultimately brought this upon myself.
I was treated for a brief time and I seemingly had things together. It wasnt until this past December that it all started up again. Im currently not being treated and find myself struggling with my disorder regularly and my episodes are sometimes worse than others.
The basis of my anxiety I believe is the fear of dying although I wonder if I might be suffering from social anxiety as well. I would say that fearing death is the most prominant reason I find myself worrying. Although I try to coax myself out of feeling these feelings I cant let go of the idea that something is wrong with me and Im going to drop dead.
Roughly six months before the anxiety and panic began, I lost someone close to me. I found myself dreaming about death and the end of the world a lot. I started to think about dying on a regular basis. A few months before that, I flew for the first time since I was a child and that completely freaked me out considering how death had become something I couldnt stop thinking about.
Finally, the night before my life became consumed with anxiety and panic, I had gone out drinking. As embarassing and shameful as it is to say, I drove myself home. The next morning when I woke up I was so worried that I may have hurt someone on my way home that I began looking online at local news websites just to make sure there hadnt been any hit and run accidents. I remember that morning my heart was beating so fast from the fear of not knowing what I could have done. But, even after I realized I had fortunately not hurt anyone, I couldnt shake the anxious feeling. My heart wouldnt slow down even into the afternoon and my chest was hurting. I ended up driving myself 30 minutes from where I was to my hometown to see a doctor because I thought I might be having heart trouble. I hate to think that I ultimately brought this upon myself.
I was treated for a brief time and I seemingly had things together. It wasnt until this past December that it all started up again. Im currently not being treated and find myself struggling with my disorder regularly and my episodes are sometimes worse than others.
The basis of my anxiety I believe is the fear of dying although I wonder if I might be suffering from social anxiety as well. I would say that fearing death is the most prominant reason I find myself worrying. Although I try to coax myself out of feeling these feelings I cant let go of the idea that something is wrong with me and Im going to drop dead.