BlessedMom
03-07-2014, 11:24 AM
Sooo here's the scoop a lot has happened and continues to happen (not so good) in my personal life BUT I'm making huge strides in the right direction.
By December I had hit a new low, by January I was well versed in wallowing and in February I took charge!
I weaned off my meds and stopped smoking. That almost got a few people hurt :) That was all I could take for February.
This month I quit drinking (I REALLY like my wine) and joined a local gym and have been going daily, I use to work out at home and when I teach but I wanted something just for ME. I force myself every day to go and I work out hard and amazingly enough every night since I've started I SLEEP!!!! (I even drooled once, YEAH ME)
Another goofy thing, totally girly but I'm into my false eyelashes they make me feel pretty...oh so pretty... I jest. Anyways, I'm starting to feel really good about myself. Wow. Did I just type that?
I have used the search bar and read a lot here lately. I've searched every issue I've ever dreamt of and every worry and its here! It makes me realize its the anxiety not ME. I'm not defined by it unless I allow it to define me.
I enjoyed very much the candid advice I read in a post about "owning" your fear, even embracing what you fear and I tested it out. Guess what.........its fricken hilarious to do! Example: I started to panic the other day about being rude, or so I thought, to a teacher at the Catholic school and started to dream up all these horrible scenerios and how she must think I'm a bitch etc.
THEN the post came to mind...embrace it, own it, test it....so I said to myself "Well you ARE a bitch, and you were rude. You meant to be rude, she's a bitch too. So what. Move on." And I burst out laughing. I'm shaking my head because it seems to simple. We are so worried about what others think and feel about us that we beat ourselves up and it makes me mad that I've wasted so ooooo much time and effort on these fears.
I'm doing great today, that's all I can ask for. Here's to hoping tomorrow is as good :) I hope you all can find something that makes you stronger and lose something that makes you feel bad....even for a day!
By December I had hit a new low, by January I was well versed in wallowing and in February I took charge!
I weaned off my meds and stopped smoking. That almost got a few people hurt :) That was all I could take for February.
This month I quit drinking (I REALLY like my wine) and joined a local gym and have been going daily, I use to work out at home and when I teach but I wanted something just for ME. I force myself every day to go and I work out hard and amazingly enough every night since I've started I SLEEP!!!! (I even drooled once, YEAH ME)
Another goofy thing, totally girly but I'm into my false eyelashes they make me feel pretty...oh so pretty... I jest. Anyways, I'm starting to feel really good about myself. Wow. Did I just type that?
I have used the search bar and read a lot here lately. I've searched every issue I've ever dreamt of and every worry and its here! It makes me realize its the anxiety not ME. I'm not defined by it unless I allow it to define me.
I enjoyed very much the candid advice I read in a post about "owning" your fear, even embracing what you fear and I tested it out. Guess what.........its fricken hilarious to do! Example: I started to panic the other day about being rude, or so I thought, to a teacher at the Catholic school and started to dream up all these horrible scenerios and how she must think I'm a bitch etc.
THEN the post came to mind...embrace it, own it, test it....so I said to myself "Well you ARE a bitch, and you were rude. You meant to be rude, she's a bitch too. So what. Move on." And I burst out laughing. I'm shaking my head because it seems to simple. We are so worried about what others think and feel about us that we beat ourselves up and it makes me mad that I've wasted so ooooo much time and effort on these fears.
I'm doing great today, that's all I can ask for. Here's to hoping tomorrow is as good :) I hope you all can find something that makes you stronger and lose something that makes you feel bad....even for a day!