Jgirl-73
03-02-2014, 11:21 AM
Good afternoon everyone! I'm just wondering about a very disturbing MENTAL feeling that I get. I've suffered anxiety for so many years that physical symptoms no longer scare me. You know, heart pounding, flushing, dry mouth, shaking, trouble breathing...I've learned they can't hurt me & so mostly I don't even get them much. BUT, I do get a "feeling" mentally that I can't explain but will do my best.
It almost feels like a memory but it's different every time. It's a feeling of dread, despair, and deep darkness that sucks all well being from me. It so bad and yes, it panics me plus makes me feel like I'm going crazy or dying OR already have and I'm remembering it. It's very hard to explain but after it came on me last night, I realized it is what I fear. If I knew for a fact it was part of panic disorder, I think I wouldn't fear it. But it feels different and I start fearing I've got something else mentally wrong. I've googled this and looked everywhere for others who can describe it and say they have it too but to no avail. My therapist doesn't know what I'm talking about either but she does believe it's a symptom of an overly stimulated nervous system. Simply stated, when my brain and nervous system are stressed, they can play tricks on my perceptions.
Does anyone else experience something similar? Thoughts? I'm at the end of my rope...I don't want to go back on meds but healing on my own has been long and up and down. That can't be healthy!
It almost feels like a memory but it's different every time. It's a feeling of dread, despair, and deep darkness that sucks all well being from me. It so bad and yes, it panics me plus makes me feel like I'm going crazy or dying OR already have and I'm remembering it. It's very hard to explain but after it came on me last night, I realized it is what I fear. If I knew for a fact it was part of panic disorder, I think I wouldn't fear it. But it feels different and I start fearing I've got something else mentally wrong. I've googled this and looked everywhere for others who can describe it and say they have it too but to no avail. My therapist doesn't know what I'm talking about either but she does believe it's a symptom of an overly stimulated nervous system. Simply stated, when my brain and nervous system are stressed, they can play tricks on my perceptions.
Does anyone else experience something similar? Thoughts? I'm at the end of my rope...I don't want to go back on meds but healing on my own has been long and up and down. That can't be healthy!