Terrified

[Scdg17]

My depression has reached a new level. The combination of isolation, depression, PTSD, and hopelessness is the the perfect formula for self harm and suicide. I can't even trust myself around steak knives or household cleaning products. The impulse is too strong. So I lock myself away in my room all day and try to reach out to friends but I don't wana burden them or make them feel like they have to try to "save me." The ONLY reason I haven't acted on it is because I know the devastating effect it will have on my mom and friends. It seems no amount of therapy, quotes, exercise, meditation, etc is making a dent. Things are just getting worse and more desperate.

[Cimi]

u should not think of that. just start by doing something small. no need to go extreme on you. enjoy life as it is. u only get to live once.

[Ingrid_Cerillium525]

I know just how u feel. I hope things will get better for you!

[stp4779]

Is medication something you've tried or are willing to try?

[Scdg17]

Medication is not an option for me. I'm a recovering addict and meds would definitely cause more problems than they're worth. I've been trying natural remedies for a while now. But I don't think it's as much of a chemical problem as much as personal coping issue.

[Dahila]

Hon meditation is the answer, nothing else is good for you. Sometimes even exercise can cause anxiety to go up.... Meditation, avoiding aggressive, sad or guilty thoughts, good diet , water not pops to drink or green , white tea....
First of all forgive yourself for the past, it is gone, do not dwell on future because it is not here yet. Be here and now, and really forget about the past, it is what is making you so sick. Herbal remedies would help, there is Valerian root, very effective, lemon balm, aka Melissa medicinales.... There is a lot you can do to help yourself:))