garyg199
02-19-2014, 04:18 PM
Hi all, I am not sure where to post this, and I apologize if this is the wrong thread to do so.
My soon to be mother-in law is incredibly abusive to her 85 year old mother. Never is there any physical abuse but every other kind presents itself, for sure.
My girlfriend and I are now living with her grandmother to help her with some bills and the house. Unfortunately, her mother is and has been living here as well. On the grandmother's couch, with her 4 cats, destroying this friggin house. It's disgusting to watch. I have tried to research my options as much as possible, to no avail. My only real option would be to report her. Yes, I understand, it's the only logical thing as well. However, being it is not my house, and not even my immediate family, I feel terribly out of place for doing that. I just do not know what to do besides watch it happen.
The mother does not work, she sits on the brand new couches and watches Tv and smokes literally all day every day. Mind you she is smoking within 7 feet of a full oxygen tank in the living room closet. She has destroyed every piece of furniture this poor old woman has. Stains everywhere, cigarette burns in everything with cloth. Everything smells like an ashtray. Also, she is for sure a drug addict, and my girlfriend witnessed her stealing and switching her grandmother's medication just days ago! The only time she really leaves, is to go to the bar where she gets obliterated, and comes home to fight,yell, and scream at all of us. It's frightening sometimes, even for me. Especially dealing with my own stresses that cause me anxiety. Also, even when she is not drinking, she fights with the grandmother constantly, and says the most stupid and contradicting things. They are also very nasty comments. Just today, for example, I had to switch out a cable box for lil ole granny and the mother in law came home and had a fit because she couldn't watch tv! Even told grandma here to get a life! Yeah, the 47 year old woman living on her mother's couch told HER to get a life! It's obscene!
By the way...I was gone with the cable box for 15 damn minutes.
There are so many more instances that I could share to paint a picture of the situation, but hopefully the point has been made. Anyway, the worst part about this all, is that the grandmother doesn't seem to do anything, or even want to try. I hear her screaming at her to get out...but she will never leave. She has it to easy here! Also, I do think that she is afraid of her own daughter, but will never admit that. So, in my eyes, this is all her fault for enabling her daughter and letting this go on for so long.
I just don't know what to do! It is so frustrating for my girlfriend and I to not be able to do anything!
Hopefully you guys can at least give me some advice? Maybe someone has had a similar story, and could let me know how it ended or how they fixed it?
Thank you so much in advanced! Any help will do!
My soon to be mother-in law is incredibly abusive to her 85 year old mother. Never is there any physical abuse but every other kind presents itself, for sure.
My girlfriend and I are now living with her grandmother to help her with some bills and the house. Unfortunately, her mother is and has been living here as well. On the grandmother's couch, with her 4 cats, destroying this friggin house. It's disgusting to watch. I have tried to research my options as much as possible, to no avail. My only real option would be to report her. Yes, I understand, it's the only logical thing as well. However, being it is not my house, and not even my immediate family, I feel terribly out of place for doing that. I just do not know what to do besides watch it happen.
The mother does not work, she sits on the brand new couches and watches Tv and smokes literally all day every day. Mind you she is smoking within 7 feet of a full oxygen tank in the living room closet. She has destroyed every piece of furniture this poor old woman has. Stains everywhere, cigarette burns in everything with cloth. Everything smells like an ashtray. Also, she is for sure a drug addict, and my girlfriend witnessed her stealing and switching her grandmother's medication just days ago! The only time she really leaves, is to go to the bar where she gets obliterated, and comes home to fight,yell, and scream at all of us. It's frightening sometimes, even for me. Especially dealing with my own stresses that cause me anxiety. Also, even when she is not drinking, she fights with the grandmother constantly, and says the most stupid and contradicting things. They are also very nasty comments. Just today, for example, I had to switch out a cable box for lil ole granny and the mother in law came home and had a fit because she couldn't watch tv! Even told grandma here to get a life! Yeah, the 47 year old woman living on her mother's couch told HER to get a life! It's obscene!
By the way...I was gone with the cable box for 15 damn minutes.
There are so many more instances that I could share to paint a picture of the situation, but hopefully the point has been made. Anyway, the worst part about this all, is that the grandmother doesn't seem to do anything, or even want to try. I hear her screaming at her to get out...but she will never leave. She has it to easy here! Also, I do think that she is afraid of her own daughter, but will never admit that. So, in my eyes, this is all her fault for enabling her daughter and letting this go on for so long.
I just don't know what to do! It is so frustrating for my girlfriend and I to not be able to do anything!
Hopefully you guys can at least give me some advice? Maybe someone has had a similar story, and could let me know how it ended or how they fixed it?
Thank you so much in advanced! Any help will do!