Back and feeling low :-(

[petrified]

Hi all I'm back in one way I'm pleased to be back and in another I don't like feeling like this. Well so Friday my sister in law a year older than me at 28 has been diagnosed with cervical cancer. This has left me so upset for her. We aren't in the best of terms at the minute and I feel so guilty for this. She's not the easiest of people to get along with but I just feel guilty for not trying harder. I wish we could help more but she lives away.
I now feel guilty for feeling like something bad is going to happen to me now, my anxiety is back and so are my thoughts of impending doom. I'm really struggling I no my thoughts are anxiety I just feel guilty about having them as I no I shouldn't be thinking of me right now.

This is really getting me down and making me feel like a selfish person. Why does depression and anxiety make me feel like this?
I wish it could just go away for good :-(

[hippysilverware]

I'm really sorry your family is going through this... it's got to be hard on your sister. Do you think you could talk to your sister through e-mails? It might be easier than talking on the phone and maybe getting frustrated with what she says, or vice versa. It might also help to curb some of that guilt you're feeling, which might domino effect itself into your depression! It's worth a shot, if nothing else than to try and reconcile with your sister.

[petrified]

Thank you I actually sent her a card off today with a kindle voucher inside and a note inside explaining we are here for her.

I have no contact for her as she blocked us all on Facebook and has told other family members not to give us her number.

I tried to get my feelings across in the card and I hope she finally understands that life is too short for there to be b/s.

Thanks so much for your kind words and advice :-)

[NeverToo...Fear]

Family is tough.. it's easy to feel guilty for not trying harder, ah, but the point is that you are trying. And that's all you can do. The other half is on her; and really the best thing you can do is just be open to her, ready to support. Sorry again about her diagnoses.

Sorry about the impending doom thoughts as well. It's bad enough we project that something bad is going happen naturally, and then on top of it to feel guilty about it!

But I don't think you are selfish; We can't help how we think; and the thoughts don't dictate our actions. And besides, how can you be selfish when you are caring about wanting to help your sister in law?

[petrified]

Family is tough.. it's easy to feel guilty for not trying harder, ah, but the point is that you are trying. And that's all you can do. The other half is on her; and really the best thing you can do is just be open to her, ready to support. Sorry again about her diagnoses.

Sorry about the impending doom thoughts as well. It's bad enough we project that something bad is going happen naturally, and then on top of it to feel guilty about it!

But I don't think you are selfish; We can't help how we think; and the thoughts don't dictate our actions. And besides, how can you be selfish when you are caring about wanting to help your sister in law?

Thanks NTF I will try and not feel guilty about everything I just thinks that's me lol. I'm hoping she accepts the olive branch I have sent her.