Getting made fun of

[Myles Jeffries]

So I'm 20, going to university and still live at home because it's way cheaper, but this forces me to live with my mom. She is probably the worst person I've ever met in my entire life I terms of motherhood and morality(sounds mean but she's a really horrible person) and she constantly makes fun of me for my panic attacks. Does anybody have any tips on dealing with this kind of situation because it's wearing down on me.

[NixonRulz]

So I'm 20, going to university and still live at home because it's way cheaper, but this forces me to live with my mom. She is probably the worst person I've ever met in my entire life I terms of motherhood and morality(sounds mean but she's a really horrible person) and she constantly makes fun of me for my panic attacks. Does anybody have any tips on dealing with this kind of situation because it's wearing down on me.

Your mom's a bully?

How screwed up

I don't know what to tell you, honestly

i would say have a sit down conversation with her and calmly tell her

But I'm sure you have tried and failed many times at that

I would probably move out despite the cost disadvantage

Dealing with panic attacks and trying to recover is difficult yet having your mom of all people stressing you out by acting like a dumb ass

That is just stupid

[stp4779]

Hi Myles,
Welcome to the forum by the way :)

I'm not a huge fan of my mom either, so I can relate. I sympathize with you a million times... getting made fun of for anxiety is the EXACT opposite of what people like us need. I'm wondering if your mom is having a hard time dealing with your anxiety, so keeping things "fun and light-hearted" is the only way she knows how to deal? I read your other post about how your boyfriend deals with your anxiety... it sounds like he is scared about it too because he doesn't understand it. It's possible your mom is afraid of it as well because she doesn't understand it? I'm wondering if there's a way you can sit her (and your boyfriend) down and seriously explain to them that this is a real illness and that you're suffering... do you think they would listen? I agreed with another person who suggested that you could help educate your boyfriend... send him some links, some reading material. Knowledge truly is power. Your mom sounds like a tough cookie to crack, but maybe your boyfriend would be more receptive to learning about your illness? And trust me, having 1 person in your court can make a huge difference. But maybe your mom will be receptive and respond?

[Myles Jeffries]

Yeah it's extremely tough. She makes fun of my hyperventilating or me asking for help. She actually will mock my voice during a panic attack to make it worse. Recently I was having an attack late at night and she walked in and told me to shut up be has she was trying to sleep. Truly a horrible person. While my boyfriend is scared and doesn't understand it much she does. She is on a mild dose of Xanax due to anxiety but bit attacks. But she has had them occasionally. She at least semi knows what it's like. She is one of those people that only care about themselves and money. It's really difficult to deal with because I have no idea what to do. It makes me scared to have a panic attack at home because she's there and we all know what fear of a panic attack is like. She won't listen when I talk and only gives me shit even though I can say with confidence that I am a good son. But it may seem I just have to continue to ignore it until I can distance myself from her.

[TrueVoiceInc]

Hi Myles, Could you find a roommate to live with at a low cost? I get saving money but sometimes you just need to be away from a situation.
Also, from this forum you can see that you are not alone with dealing with anxiety! It is real.
Best of luck to you!!!

[Myles Jeffries]

That does seem like the best solution. I'll have to really try to find someone to stay with because I need to make sure my health is a priority. Thanks for the advice guys!

[stp4779]

I CAN NOT believe your mom also suffers from anxiety and mocks you!!! I'm in agreement with everyone else... I think the best thing you can do to get healthier is to put yourself in a healthy and supporting environment – away from mom!

[ab123]

That does seem like the best solution. I'll have to really try to find someone to stay with because I need to make sure my health is a priority. Thanks for the advice guys!

Definitely think you should find a roommate, that is awful. But you will rise up even stronger because of it..that Is what you will gain out of all of this, hang in there!

[Myles Jeffries]

Everyone is so sweet and has really made me feel better about the whole situation. Thank you everybody! It helped make this a better day!

[JLBnole68]

Sorry your mom isn't being supportive. That's tough when you feel like you can't turn to family members. As others have suggested, you need to find people who are understanding so you can get the support you need. And, of course, there are always lots of awesome people here who know exactly what you're dealing with.

[Kyle Morgan]

Sorry mate, didn't realise you had it so tough, I know it's difficult when you feel like you don't have support, I'm sure your mother does care for you but she has a funny way of showing it. My dad's the same he thinks Panic attacks and Anxiety is all in my head, which is true but the way he says it can sometimes come off as being unsupported. Best of luck man, welcome to the forum too, have you any problems you're welcome to chat to me and other people on the forum. We all try and support each other on here!

[SSMommy]

Hi Myles! Welcome to the forum.
Have you ever told your mom how this makes you feel? You say she has bad morals so perhaps it wouldn't matter but maybe she doesn't realize how mean she is being. It is really hard to imagine someone having panic attacks not being compassionate towards someone else with attacks, especially their son.
That said, it can be extremely hard for someone that's never experienced it to understand so I get why your boyfriend doesn't get it and it scares the shit out of him.

I agree with everyone. Maybe if you can get the heck out of there it will help. It might help a ton. It seems it would be very anxiety inducing to love with a mother like that.

I'm sorry you have to deal with that. There are a ton of awesome people here willing to support you and give advice whenever you need it!

-Becky

[janey]

So I'm 20, going to university and still live at home because it's way cheaper, but this forces me to live with my mom. She is probably the worst person I've ever met in my entire life I terms of motherhood and morality(sounds mean but she's a really horrible person) and she constantly makes fun of me for my panic attacks. Does anybody have any tips on dealing with this kind of situation because it's wearing down on me.

Seems to me like she's some kind of emotional sadist. She gets excitement from seeing you in pain, I suspect. Just ignore the lady and don't show her that she's hurting you. In fact, don't even go to her for anything or even tell her you're feeling anxious. You can't change someone like that and I bet you're not the only one she does this to.

[Myles Jeffries]

You nailed that one spot on. She does it to everyone in her life. It's just a difficult thing to accept. Mothers are supposed to be. Well...mothers you know?

[janey]

Yes, but in all honesty that's something the media portrays. The truth is not all women are fit to be mothers, yet still produce children anyway. Lots of sociopaths are parents and really shouldn't be. Just don't play her stupid games. That's all you can do.

[blondieqtpie]

I work with children and families and 100% agree. It does not seem fair that some junkie low life will bear a child... Often using while pregnant while other couples that have stability in their lives struggle to conceive.
The stories and case studies I've heard and read ... Just is saddening.

[blondieqtpie]

One of the best things you can do if you suspect neglect or abuse is to report it. And the more people who report on the same family the stronger the case is against them.
Done be a bystander --- bystanders to abuse and bullying is almost as bad. And most of the the time whether reporting to police or social services you can remain a anonymous ... They will investigate.