Hello Everyone! I'm new to the forum!

[Alyssa37]

First id like to say how grateful I am to of found a place I can come to where I don't feel alone in this horrible nightmare of anxiety. I've always had anxiety I've been a worry wart since I was little. Ive had the occasional panic attack but it was nothing I couldn't handle. Id get a panic attack maybe once or twice a year. My nightmare started Dec 15th. I woke up feeling anxious which eventually turned into a panic attack and from there on out ive been living in pure hell ever since. Almost feels like a constant panic attack day and night. I always feel anxious. Just a overall of uneasiness. My main symptom is I feel like I have a elephant on my chest 24/7 and its hard to breathe. This can last a whole day to 2 weeks. Its horrible. There are times my chest is so sore from the tightness. My chest always feels weird no matter what and not a day goes by that I dont have several adrenaline waves that go through me. The er and my dr all say its anxiety. I have had a ekg, chest xray, echocardiogram and blood work and everything is perfect. but its so hard for me to accept the fact that anxiety makes you feel this horrible from morning till night. I went from a active mom to having a hard time to get anything done and cries constantly because im miserable. . And that hurts me the most. I have a wonderful husband who is supportive but I feel bad because this has changed our lives. I tried zoloft and buspar but it made me feel worse. Right now I am on trazadone to help me sleep and I just started taking paxil today. I do have ativan for really bad days but most of the time I sit and cry because id rather suffer then take it. Ativan scares me cause ive heard how addicting they can be. My questions so far is how long does it typically take to find the right meds to start feeling like yourself again. Is there a light at the end of the tunnel or is this how life will continue to be? After almost 2 mths of this its scaring me I wont ever feel better. Well sorry for the long novel, but I would like to say im excited to getting to know you all and giving you the support the best I can.

Alyssa

[TryingSoHard1979]

Alyssa, welcome... I can relate all too well. I know that elephant on my chest as he sits there time and time again. The 24/7 panic is also something that gets me as well. I have been better before but time and time again I find myself in this deep dark hole fighting just to get through the moments. I am currently in that hole and fighting for my life, my peace, and my happiness. It is a struggle, but all we can do is fight or give up.. I can not give up, and neither will you. People like us are stronger than we give ourselves credit for. We endure things that most will never understand, we accomplish things that may seem trivial to others, but to us are monumental efforts of achievement. Hang in there!!! I am new to the forum as well...but yes it is good to be amongst others with wisdom, experience, and compassion. I hope you have a peaceful night. Keep fighting the good fight..

Danny

[TryingSoHard1979]

BTW there is always hope and a light, it may not come when you want it to, or how you'd like it too, but hold on, better days are ahead. I have been dealing with this for over13 years now. I was terrified of medication and finally after years got on Zoloft and Klonopin, which served me fairly well until this october when I got off the zoloft. I was hit with a ton of bricks with a severe anxiety, depression, and strange phobias, and scary thoughts. I tried last Friday to get back on zoloft, but after three days was having some of the worst feelings and panic I have had in a very long time. I am not sure why this attempt failed and since I have gotten 10 times worse than before my attempt to get back on zoloft. I am a mess and scared, but I MUST hold onto hope. In times like these it may be all we have.....

[Alyssa37]

Thank you so much for the replies. I appreciate it so much. This is just so hard to deal with. Your fine one day and bam you wake up the next in a horrible nightmare. And you have no idea whats even causing it. I keep fighting everyday but it keeps getting harder. I dont want to be pessimistic but I feel like im never going to get better. This is so hard.

[TryingSoHard1979]

Totally understandable, I feel the same way. It is very hard to see the light when this can be so consuming. As one who has been down this road many times, I will say things always get better to some degree and at some point, sometimes its rather quick, sometimes it is a longer process. Right now I am trying my best to remember that!!!
Thank you so much for the replies. I appreciate it so much. This is just so hard to deal with. Your fine one day and bam you wake up the next in a horrible nightmare. And you have no idea whats even causing it. I keep fighting everyday but it keeps getting harder. I dont want to be pessimistic but I feel like im never going to get better. This is so hard.

[SunflowerBlue]

Welcome! :)

[TryingSoHard1979]

Thank you sunflower!!!!

[stp4779]

Alyssa, you've come to the right place – welcome to the forum! I too have been in the throws of 24/7 anxiety, made trips to the ER, had cardiograms and blood tests... anxiety feels like a giant fist suffocating you. I've sat on the couch at 4 am and cried and cried until I thought I couldn't cry any more. Doing the most simple tasks such as showering or getting dressed become seemingly insurmountable. We understand all too well.

I think you're heading in the right direction by taking Paxil. Since it's an SSRI, give it time to build up in your system. There are a lot of positive reviews about SSRI's on the forum... medication isn't magic, but it calms you down enough so you can focus on tackling your anxiety head on. You will find the forum is full of great tips and advice, and people who understand and are there to listen.

[JoeCool]

Welcome Alyssa! As many have said, we're all glad you've found this site to help you cope with your anxiety. There are a few of us theta suffer from this health related anxiety on one form or another. It's terrible!!! I can completely relate to your thoughts on how it makes you feel! It's soooo exhausting. However, you have to believe that you'll get better. Find that coping mechanism that works for you and continue to work on it. Things will get better...

[fazen]

Welcome to the family!

I recently joined a week back and it's great!

We have an awesome Facebook thread going, come on in, the waters great!