My last hope!

[justme55]

Hi all, haven't posted for a bit. Well went to the doc the other day for the burning thru the body feeling and muscle aches. She ran blood tests and said everything looks fine. I can't help thinking she missed something as the symptoms are still with me. Tomorrow I go to my first acupuncture session and I'm feeling like this is my last shot. I have been on so many ssri's and benzo's I'm just done feeling like my pychs test experiment. Start this one stop this one, just done. You name it I have been on it and they make me so sick. I have /as I type this my heart is pounding and skipping like crazy..................just so tired!
My daughters don't call anymore, can't blame them really had an episode where I called them begging for help, they told me to go to the doctor. We have always been so close, I was always there for them when they needed me as their father died when they were very young. They are good kind caring young women and I have gone from a happy go lucky mom/grandma to a raging anxiety ridden burden. I called my grandson today that lifted my spirits. He to is probably thinking what happened to Grammy? I am tired of my doc blaming everything on my anxiety. I'm sure some of you can relate.
Not expecting a miracle from acupuncture but even if it can put my heart at rest that would be huge. After 4 trips to er and 2 psych wards I don't think I can take anymore. All the bad crap that has happened in my life has certainly caught up with me and I feel like I am losing the fight. I'm sorry if I sound selfish I know it could be so much worse as I have been told!!

Thanks for listening.

[jessed03]

Have you had any gastro problems during your life?

I had the same symptoms as you, had them blamed on anxiety, even went to therapy for it... Later found out it was food related. I had Celiac disease (wheat allergy) that had begun to cause anxiety, skin burning, muscle problems and tiredness. I didn't have many problems other than that, I was shocked when told.

Obviously other foods/substances can cause the same problem.

Anxiety can for sure cause the problems you seem to have, but not everything is anxiety ya know. Doctors skip over stuff, not life threatening stuff, they've got that covered, but holistic stuff.

They're more focused on making sure you aren't infected or dying, than they are getting your body into harmony. Sometimes you have to do a little of your own digging.

I'm sure your acupuncturist will be able to tell you a little more about where anything seems off with your bodily balance, they're pretty on the ball about that stuff.

It's good to get completely checked, medically and holistically, and then dedicate all of your energy to anxiety battles if/when everything comes back fine. Gives you more reassurance when you've done both.

[GeneAllen]

We are here and listening. Let it all hang out as they say. We care, and love you. Yep we do :D Just the way you are right now, which won't be the same forever by the way. Peace

[justme55]

Nope never stomach problems, until my anxiety. Thanks for your words.

[Th13thOne]

I am basically right where you are for the most part. You're not alone.

As long as some point in the day I get to email, chat, communicate with someone from this forum it's not hopeless.

I haven't been to psych wards but have asked to be put in and monitored and I've been to "crisis beds" to spend the night with other people in my situation and have said those exact words.. "My Last Hope". I have felt like I've hit rock bottom more than once. Just today I thought about ending my life several times.

Keep up the fight please!

Hope your acupuncture does you some good. Good luck! :)

[justme55]

GeneAllen, thank you so much for your words. My heart is full. Thank you

[justme55]

Thanks 13th I have no words except thank you to all of you for your understanding. I'm just tired of it all!!!

[GeneAllen]

GeneAllen, thank you so much for your words. My heart is full. Thank you

Well I don't want to come off as corny or too sentimental, but damn it we all love one another here, and we will see that we have won this battle, and we will do it collectively.

You are welcome. May you have peace now.:D