break ups

[jjh333]

on friday, boyfriend of two years and I got into a big argument, resulting in maybe breaking up... we're working on things but I'm not sure how it's going to work out. How do/have you guys gotten over breakups?

it's hard to talk with friends about this because they do not have anxiety, and break ups always cause a great increase in my anxiety/panic attacks

[I am not my brain]

Only way to get over a break-up, unfortunately, is time.

I still haven't gotten over the break-up of my long term relationship, and it's been over a year. In the beginning it was really hard, but it has gotten easier as time has went by.

[NixonRulz]

That sucks, Jillian. I'm sorry for you.

I think as a guy, we do thins differently

I honestly would just go out that night and have a one night stand to shake my mind off of it

I know that makes me shallow but it was the cure for any girl rolling out on me

You seem like a good girl. That's a compliment, I assure you so don't don't what I did

You know what you have

It's your decision if what you have is what you want indefinitely

Sometimes we think we are content with who we are with

Being content isn't the goal. It's to truly be happy

This decision is your since only you know where your heart is

I would bet that you are worth fighting for

[Dahila]

You never recover from broken heart, but you will be in love again, and again :)))

[jjh333]

thanks for answering guys. It's all just bringing up a lot of my anxiety and symptoms like not being able to eat or sleep and I basically have felt miserable and alone all day

[neilsarg2012]

Time is a healer every takes time it's laws hard specially if it's your first love but like I said as you get older you will look back and think about it and smile ;) just keep busy and your mind active and see friends always helps :)

[neilsarg2012]

Time is a healer every takes time it's laws hard specially if it's your first love but like I said as you get older you will look back and think about it and smile ;) just keep busy and your mind active and see friends always helps :)

I hate my phone I should check what I wrote before sending lol

[reese]

on friday, boyfriend of two years and I got into a big argument, resulting in maybe breaking up... we're working on things but I'm not sure how it's going to work out. How do/have you guys gotten over breakups? it's hard to talk with friends about this because they do not have anxiety, and break ups always cause a great increase in my anxiety/panic attacks.

Break ups are definitely bad for my anxiety too. I just went through a pretty wicked one in September and my anxiety has spiked ever since. I think it's because of losing support and safety that the other person gave you. Be strong and don't let your mind trick you into thinking you're too weak to overcome this anxiety! Working on being your own support and safety helps a lot too. Good luck :)

[NixonRulz]

Breaking up is Hard to do

I may write a song about this

[mistiblue]

Nixon- you crack me up...

So sorry your experiencing this :( Break ups are so hard, but as others have said...time is a healer.

[jjh333]

Nixon I think your song might make me feel a lot better :P

You guys are definitely right about time, it just sucks that there isnt some quick simple formula to follow. I hate time, the unknown of the future and worrying about repeating anxiety and depression makes me anxiety. a nice catch 22!

[NixonRulz]

Nixon I think your song might make me feel a lot better :P

You guys are definitely right about time, it just sucks that there isnt some quick simple formula to follow. I hate time, the unknown of the future and worrying about repeating anxiety and depression makes me anxiety. a nice catch 22!

Jillian - are you feeling a little better?

How did the two of you leave it?

[Dahila]

Nixon craks everyone up :))

Breaks up are tough on both girls and boys. We are strange spiecies from tears to laugh. When we feel so down, something happens , something good....Broken heart is awful and the suffering, but we grow, and we look at the life in different way. We carry the scars on our heart whole life, but we fall in love again. Just look around you. Life is beautiful:) You will be better , soon

[jjh333]

thanks dahila, that was really nice to read :)

Nixon, we didnt speak saturday or sunday during the day. Finally on sunday night we decided to get together and talk. He apologized and said things he knows he could work on... I just need to decide if I feel like things will actually get better/if it is worth staying together since he is in public accounting so he is working 70 hours a week and balancing time between himself, friends, and me will pose a problem... especially since we can't text/talk while he is working and he is not a huge phone person at all. Communication/ feeling supported is huge for me in a relationship, and it's hard not being able to talk at all during this busy time

[NixonRulz]

thanks dahila, that was really nice to read :)

Nixon, we didnt speak saturday or sunday during the day. Finally on sunday night we decided to get together and talk. He apologized and said things he knows he could work on... I just need to decide if I feel like things will actually get better/if it is worth staying together since he is in public accounting so he is working 70 hours a week and balancing time between himself, friends, and me will pose a problem... especially since we can't text/talk while he is working and he is not a huge phone person at all. Communication/ feeling supported is huge for me in a relationship, and it's hard not being able to talk at all during this busy time

It sounds as if he has a good job and that is important

Do you think that schedule will change? If it doesn't, are you going to be okay with it?

I realize it is hard to balance so many things and people have different needs from a relationship

When I met my wife, everything else became secondary

1 week in and I knew this was it and I just never stopped feeling that way

Not saying that one way is right or not

I guess I am more asking if the two of you have the same needs and the same priorities?

I dont want to get to personal though

[jjh333]

It sounds as if he has a good job and that is important

Do you think that schedule will change? If it doesn't, are you going to be okay with it?

I realize it is hard to balance so many things and people have different needs from a relationship

When I met my wife, everything else became secondary

1 week in and I knew this was it and I just never stopped feeling that way

Not saying that one way is right or not

I guess I am more asking if the two of you have the same needs and the same priorities?

I dont want to get to personal though


Schedule will go back to relatively normal (9-5) in the middle of March.

I don't mind the questions, I appreciate you answering!

I think that neither of us are really ready for everything else to become secondary, which is one of the reasons he was freaking out because i've become a big priority when he barely has time for himself right now. Timing is really just hard. We both want to see each other, family, friends, work, and have enough time for ourselves which is kind of impossible currently. He was one of my best friends for two years before we started dating, so it scares me that it would be like losing a best friend and a boyfriend.

[NixonRulz]

Something tells me that this is going to work out. You seem sincere.

You sound really sensible and understand why he is so busy

He will always appreciate that

Can Dahilia be my date to the wedding?

[Dahila]

Surreeeeeeeeeeee Nixon rulez

[NixonRulz]

Surreeeeeeeeeeee Nixon rulez

Just for giggles, let's have a panic attack right when they are saying "I do"

Sorry, Jillian, I think we are hijacking your wedding

[Dahila]

Oh she would not mind;)) yeah Nixon panic attack is awesome idea :)))

[NixonRulz]

Oh she would not mind;)) yeah Nixon panic attack is awesome idea :)))

For some reason, if that happens, Jillian would introduce her shoe to my face.

[jjh333]

I would probably like to try and avoid panic attacks at the moment of I do, but as long as you guys dance you'll be fine ;)

I just need to figure out if my anxiety about the situation is going to go away, and if not my flight response is going to kick in quite fast

[jjh333]

Sooo the boy and I just hung out Friday night. Tonight we went out separately and were planning on eventually ending in the same place. He was passed out drunk and I have never done this in my life but something told me to read through his phone. He's been kind of sexting/flirting with another girl and now I'm lost

[JoeCool]

So sorry to hear this jjh! Talk to him and inquire what it's all about and then make a decision. This must feel horrible but keep things in perspective...

[Enduronman]

You can do better anyway and he was a hugggggeeeee part of your anxiety!!! Congratulations!!...

E-Man. :)

[NixonRulz]

Sooo the boy and I just hung out Friday night. Tonight we went out separately and were planning on eventually ending in the same place. He was passed out drunk and I have never done this in my life but something told me to read through his phone. He's been kind of sexting/flirting with another girl and now I'm lost

I am sure that is a kick in the face and Im sorry you have to go through this

If you looked through his phone and saw the texts, how detailed were they and when were they sent?

Just curious if it may have started when you and he were on the outs

Based on my actions after break ups, the day after I was looking to be with someone to ease the pain a bit

You probably have a gut feeling with this and I am just asking as one being on the outside with no skin in the game

Do you believe it is just a recent thing or maybe know who she is and they have some history?