GeneAllen
01-26-2014, 07:56 AM
I know the ailments, fatigue, frustration, heart issues, horrific thoughts, worries concerns, not being able to go to work, and socialize. I know the sleepless nights, the
headaches, the heartaches, the deep feelings of insecurity, being alone, feeling lonely, head spinning, thoughts magnified like a horror flick, thoughts of suicide, feelings
of going crazy, visits to the therapist, and the almighty pissed off scream inside of why me? I know these things, past, they are not me. They are my thoughts, my
feelings, my shaky hands, sweating feet, blushing skin, tingles in my body, and past thoughts of fears as a child. I know these, I have watched them since a young
teen. I have noticed though the conditioning, the memories that haunt, the way I felt wronged, the extreme hatred, anger etc. I could go on.
What did I do, and what do I remind myself of today?
I really don't know as much as I thought. I've complicated my life by interfering with life, and hidden emotions, worries concerns. Then I concentrated on them, all for a
time. It don't matter how long, I did it as long as I needed to you will too. Bottom line with anxious thoughts or depressive thoughts are this like many have reiterated,
move with it, feel it, carry the thoughts out stay conscious as you do this, don't hide, deny, or withdraw. This is when you begin to see it's all a bluff, it's a mind game.
Stop judging yourself, labeling yourself as this or that diagnosis. You are NOT that name, names help us communicate only, only use them to relate never in your self
talk. Ask yourself what do I need? What do I prefer, What is my passion, What would I do if I did not feel so damn bad? That will lead you to who you are, The "not
sick" feeling come then, you begin with glimpses, hopes, and then the crack in all of this opens up, you see that you never could be so small as you thought, so
contracted as you thought, or so afraid of your mind. It's an illusion folks. Go with it, when you bring awareness into your fearful thoughts, the fear collapses, as you
practice this. You are NOT sick, you are calm, clear, and kind and loving. That's who you really are, all those things you truly prefer. Be good to yourself, love yourself.
I am not saying you don't need medication, I am not saying it's not okay to feel bad, I'm not saying you don't hurt. I'm saying we all do, trying to stop what is won't
work, when we give up our need to control life, we quit interfering, and our power comes back to us, it's a paradox, counterintuitive at times. Stop judging yourselves. I
will also try the same. I have personally seen this change my life. Yes I still suffer at times, but I just remember it's not who I AM. I simply AM. The mind will argue
like a spoiled child, let it, watch it, and see the whole of it is really quite wonderful and beautiful. The mind will serve us, instead of us serving it. We're beings,
experiencing a human life. Please don't miss it, be there. You've learned so much, you deserve to experience your birthright, and that is beyond even our imaginations
and we all know we have a good one of those. Just be, just be, just be. No shame in doing whatever makes you well. :D Whether you see yourself as
"well" or "sick" is right. My question is which one brings about feelings of comfort to you? Which belief do you prefer to experience?
Peace
headaches, the heartaches, the deep feelings of insecurity, being alone, feeling lonely, head spinning, thoughts magnified like a horror flick, thoughts of suicide, feelings
of going crazy, visits to the therapist, and the almighty pissed off scream inside of why me? I know these things, past, they are not me. They are my thoughts, my
feelings, my shaky hands, sweating feet, blushing skin, tingles in my body, and past thoughts of fears as a child. I know these, I have watched them since a young
teen. I have noticed though the conditioning, the memories that haunt, the way I felt wronged, the extreme hatred, anger etc. I could go on.
What did I do, and what do I remind myself of today?
I really don't know as much as I thought. I've complicated my life by interfering with life, and hidden emotions, worries concerns. Then I concentrated on them, all for a
time. It don't matter how long, I did it as long as I needed to you will too. Bottom line with anxious thoughts or depressive thoughts are this like many have reiterated,
move with it, feel it, carry the thoughts out stay conscious as you do this, don't hide, deny, or withdraw. This is when you begin to see it's all a bluff, it's a mind game.
Stop judging yourself, labeling yourself as this or that diagnosis. You are NOT that name, names help us communicate only, only use them to relate never in your self
talk. Ask yourself what do I need? What do I prefer, What is my passion, What would I do if I did not feel so damn bad? That will lead you to who you are, The "not
sick" feeling come then, you begin with glimpses, hopes, and then the crack in all of this opens up, you see that you never could be so small as you thought, so
contracted as you thought, or so afraid of your mind. It's an illusion folks. Go with it, when you bring awareness into your fearful thoughts, the fear collapses, as you
practice this. You are NOT sick, you are calm, clear, and kind and loving. That's who you really are, all those things you truly prefer. Be good to yourself, love yourself.
I am not saying you don't need medication, I am not saying it's not okay to feel bad, I'm not saying you don't hurt. I'm saying we all do, trying to stop what is won't
work, when we give up our need to control life, we quit interfering, and our power comes back to us, it's a paradox, counterintuitive at times. Stop judging yourselves. I
will also try the same. I have personally seen this change my life. Yes I still suffer at times, but I just remember it's not who I AM. I simply AM. The mind will argue
like a spoiled child, let it, watch it, and see the whole of it is really quite wonderful and beautiful. The mind will serve us, instead of us serving it. We're beings,
experiencing a human life. Please don't miss it, be there. You've learned so much, you deserve to experience your birthright, and that is beyond even our imaginations
and we all know we have a good one of those. Just be, just be, just be. No shame in doing whatever makes you well. :D Whether you see yourself as
"well" or "sick" is right. My question is which one brings about feelings of comfort to you? Which belief do you prefer to experience?
Peace