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View Full Version : I feel like a failure..Please Help



ohokay
02-21-2008, 07:27 PM
I'm in highschool, and ever since 9th grade I've thought that homework is useless. I get the subject, so I don't think teachers should send me home with a handcramp everynight, so I just don't do it. Therefore, I got F's. I now am going to go to a continuation school until I'm a senior. I was quite excited until today though. The lady who was just supposed to go over the rules decided to inspect why I was failing so miserably. Bottom line is, she made me feel completely worthless, and I started feeling an anxiety attack come on. Ever since I got home, I just feel really different. Like she sucked every bit of happiness out of me. And it's not just depression, its accompanied with just a continuing feeling of pure anxiety. I really don't know how to get out of this, I feel like everyone else can do fine in highschool but I can't. I'm very intelligent, (not trying to sound conceited) so my whole family has had these very high expectations, and now I'm going to a school where generally kids that mess up in life go to. It's not permanent and it will get me caught up, but until then I fear I'll just feel useless. Please, I need some advice to get me over this hump, because I hate feeling sorry for myself, but I just can't get over it :(

ohokay
02-22-2008, 09:24 PM
Feel even worse today. Nothing seems to help. :cry:

joey9
02-23-2008, 06:56 AM
Don't let your teacher make you feel worthless. You are perfectly able so why not channel your anxiety into something positive like proving her wrong? If you keep thinking you are worthless you will only reinforce those feelings until they seem real. You are an intelligent, capable person but you have allowed yourself to get behind in school. Accept that you should have tried harder to do your homework but its no use dwelling on it forever - channel your efforts into catching up as you know you can.

Go To Sleep
02-23-2008, 07:33 PM
In my experience being smart doesent get you through school alone, school takes effort, you cant afford to not do homework and not revise for exams.etc just because you think its all easy.

Most of my friends took this approach when (not) revising for gcse.etc and they dident do nearly as well as me coz id worked hard and revised.

Back in yr 9 i felt crap because i allowed myself to fall behind when revsing for year 9 science sats and dident do great. But in year 11 i got a AA* :)


Your teacher probably doesnt realize your potential just like my teacher in yr9 dident, youve got to have confidence in your ability and you'l kick ass 8)

Hope that made sense, im tired

random
02-23-2008, 09:51 PM
IMO homework does have a point, when you're in class you're just copying down new notes and concepts and letting the teacher and others in the class solve it. When you try to do it at home that's when you learn the ability to do it on your own.

In years 9 and 10 I lost interest in school work and grades slipped. Since I was on a scholarship I was supposed to show leadership and be at the top of the academic ranking for the year, so at the end of year 10 when I had slipped again I was pulled aside and basically given a kick up the bum, told to pull my finger out "or else". The teachers were all watching me like a hawk in year 11 to make sure I made improvements. All the attention could easily have been as much of a negative motivator as a positive one, but years 11 and 12 brought subjects that were much more interesting for me so I did get stuck into it and put in a really good performance.

The best thing you can do is try and take an interest in the work. If you want to be the best then the effort will come naturally.

That teacher sounds like a lemon, though. Ignore people who make you feel like you're worthless, you know you're better than that. You can prove her wrong, you know :)

Robbed
02-25-2008, 06:25 AM
IMO homework does have a point, when you're in class you're just copying down new notes and concepts and letting the teacher and others in the class solve it. When you try to do it at home that's when you learn the ability to do it on your own.

Sometimes homework has a point. Sometimes it doesn't. Other times, it is a valuable learning lesson, BUT there is just no reason to have to do 50 math problems every night to learn what might be simple concepts. Nonetheless, if nothing else, homework should just be looked at as one of those silly hoops that you have to jump through to get through school. So even if you don't like it and/or find that you don't need to do it to learn (and I have gotten As in college classes without doing ANY homework), just try to bite the bullet and do it.

As for teachers, let's face it. ALOT of them just plain suck. If it helps, just remember that this person who feels so high and holy is probably not very happy in life. And she is probably taking it out on you just because she CAN. This makes HER a MUCH more pathetic individual than you. So do try your best not to let her bother you.

ron111
02-25-2008, 03:08 PM
Robbed is right. Most teachers just plan suck or just don't care. Probably more of the latter. I wasn't big on homework either. But, it will pay off. Trust me. I really didn't meet good teachers(professors) until college. I had a few good hs teachers, but not too many. You just gotta hang in there. It's a marathon not a sprint. If you have any questions just pm me.

ohokay
02-26-2008, 12:07 AM
you guys, thankyou so much for the replys. Seriously this is the first place I go when I have a problem because I don't feel so alone haha :P

Today was my first day at my new school and let me tell you, it is alot easier and better than regular highschool. But I am going back my senior year to graduate normally.

Last night was horrible though. My mom's boyfriend (pretty much a stepdad) went OFF on me. Telling me how pretty much he doesn't think I'm going to graduate, and I had a breakdown. It made all this fear so much worse, and the only thing that I feel can make me motivated at ALL is taking my Xanax. But I don't want to take that ritually, because I don't want an addiction.

He loud and clear heard me last night that I hated him, and I feel horrible because while I do dislike him ALOT right now, I don't hate him. Ever since I was little I've known that hate is one of the strongest emotions you can convey, so I NEVER use it, and he knows that.

I'm still very mad at him, but I'm getting off the pitty pot. My new school will help me succeed, and I realized I just can't care what he says.

Once again thankyou all very much.

kkarnes
02-27-2008, 11:19 PM
Ohokay, I am really sorry to hear your mom's boyfriend was so hard on you. But really, it doesnt matter when you graduate. Just as long as you do it. People put themselves under immense pressure to finish school by a certain time, but really it doesnt matter when or how you do it. You gotta do whats right for you.

I know I have a tendency to push myself or come down on myself when things go wrong, and its usually spurred by anxiety. It makes it even harder when people that should be on your side feel like they are against you. Hang in there.

ohokay
02-27-2008, 11:33 PM
kkarnes, thankyou so much, that really helped! And I'm sorry for all of this rediculous anxiety stuff (I've been posting like mad!) I just have alot of fear lately and I realize this forum helps SO much.

Thankyou all, seriously :)

kkarnes
02-27-2008, 11:45 PM
Hey thats what this is for right? :)