Girlfiriend is going through anxiety/panic attacks - What do i do?? :s

[jr1810]

Hey Guys,
First time doing anything like this and posting on any kind of forum lol, but I am in need of some advice of any sort right now.

I've been going out with my gf since the start of August. We met 3 years before this date but she was in a relationship with some guy but we stayed in touch now and again really briefly in them 3 years. She had broke off a long term relationship like a month before being in a relationship with me but she knew for sure he wasn't the one (she spent the last year being unhappy with the relationship and wanted a breakup) and had no doubts when ending that relationship. So since August things were reeaaaaaaaally great. She said she could never find someone as good as me and we both love each other verry much. Everything was perfect and things were going sooo well. Till like the mid december she said she wasn't feeling herself for some reason and was confused. Then things started getting worse and she was getting a lot of anxiety and feeling depressed. She was so confused and spent most days crying not wanting to get out of bed and felt like she couldnt do anything. she also said she felt like she lost interest in what she used to do and started questioning who she was. All this was so random and sudden and occured and got worse in the space of about 3 weeks. Now she goes through ups and downs (but mainly downs) and sometimes says she can't deal with her being in this state whilst being someones girlfriend as it was stressful because she didn't understand herself what was going on. She says she can never find anyone as good as me and stuff but says I should go and move on which is NOT what i want to do at all. I'm being really understanding and supportive and she likes that, but then sometimes she gets confused as to why I'm still around (coz we've only been together 5 months) and I deserve better, but all I want is her and I'm willing to support her through this as long as it takes. She studies dentistry and finds that an added pressure now and sometimes wants to completely quit. She now gets anxious whenever someone talks to her (friends or patients) and says she gets anxious with me sometimes when i call (heart starts racing and she gets all quiet) but she knows she loves me and stuff. Doctors have put her on this drug that slows her heart rate down or something but she doesnt want any more drugs. She has been going councelling but he councellor just reckons its the relationship, but she knows she isn't feeling this way because of me. Her GP now recommends she does some CBT therapy. I'm just so confused and need some advice on how to comfort her and make her feel good about herself :s

Thanks guys x

[AmberGbenga]

You my friend are amazing, not many guys like you around! Take pride in that. Anxiety, is so hard.. It's one of the hardest things I have ever dealt with in my life, and I've been around the bush a fair few times! Your girl is doing the right things, maybe suggest her coming on here too.. We are like a family, all of us. Now, with the relationship. Jesse James ( he is on here) he and many others state that, anything put infront of recovery will eventually be lost. Her getting better needs to be her main priority, now for you this may mean giving her space, being there when she needs you, sometimes she may not contact you for days at a time, and her time may be consumed by it. Now, if you love this girl and you are willing to put in the effort to make her recovery a main priority, you guys should be fine. You need to be understanding, google anxiety.. Study it up and get knowledge on it.. Unfortunently there is no quick fix for this.. It is a time consuming recovery.. But remember no one can help her unless she is willing to help herself. She needs to push herself, aswell as take time to rest. Maybe anti depressants until she gets abit more stable, excersize helps a lot, diet also.

[Moralfe]

Jr, I commend you for not running away. It is a difficult time for your girlfriend. She needs support. There are many symptoms to anxiety/panic. What she needs is a place that makes her feel safe and you could be in that place as long as you support her. CBT therapy is great. I would recommend it to everyone. It helped me so much. When I first started going I had a fear of dying everyday. I felt like that for around 3-4 months. CBT helped me get over that fear and many other obstacles in around 6 sessions. There are many reasons for anxiety and cbt will help her identify the triggers and be able to tackle one trigger at a yime. It is a process that she can get through. Just support her and do not show her any anger or frustration you may feel. Good luck to you and your girlfriend.