mistiblue
01-14-2014, 03:56 PM
Just a warning, this will probably be long.
Today, I was on the phone paying a ticket that I received about 2 weeks ago. My court date is tomorrow and I hadn't paid it yet, so I wanted to get it paid while I was thinking about it (my husband was having a serious convo with our daughter at the time). He walked in while I was paying the ticket. When I got off the phone, he was very upset because I didn't ask him before I paid it. He handles our finances. Usually, I don't do things like that and ask him first, but he was talking with our daughter and I knew if I didn't get it paid at that moment I WOULD forget (that's just the way my brain works). I knew there was money in the account and tomorrow is payday.
Anyway, we ended up getting into a heated argument about money. He accused me being the main reason why our finances were in shambles. He was referring to my chiropractor payments and dental bills. The chiro payment is $50 a month and the dental is on a credit card, which is $40 a month. He went on to say it is because of my anxiety and I need to just stop. I am a stay at home mom and do not have a job. We have 4 children that I homeschool and on top of that I have to try and homeschool them while I am dealing with physical symptoms of anxiety.....and mental.
I literally feel like I am going to lose my mind. I feel like I am hanging on by a thread. I find it hard to deal with my children...I get so irritable with them and I just can't help it. This only makes my anxiety soar.
I am also in the process of weaning off of Klonopin.....I just feel like screaming right now. I want to run away, but I have no where to go. My children are my world, but I really feel like I am failing them in so many ways. I just want to be a normal person.
At the moment, I am having issues with urinating ALL the time and always feeling like I have to. I am awaiting tests to find out what is wrong with me. I initially thought it was anxiety, but it is not going away, so I am worrying about that as well.
I cannot express all of these things to my husband because he just doesn't understand....he is very selfish and thinks he is right about everything all the time. I am having a hard time dealing with him lately. I love him with all of my heart, but I just don't know how to cope.
Today, I was on the phone paying a ticket that I received about 2 weeks ago. My court date is tomorrow and I hadn't paid it yet, so I wanted to get it paid while I was thinking about it (my husband was having a serious convo with our daughter at the time). He walked in while I was paying the ticket. When I got off the phone, he was very upset because I didn't ask him before I paid it. He handles our finances. Usually, I don't do things like that and ask him first, but he was talking with our daughter and I knew if I didn't get it paid at that moment I WOULD forget (that's just the way my brain works). I knew there was money in the account and tomorrow is payday.
Anyway, we ended up getting into a heated argument about money. He accused me being the main reason why our finances were in shambles. He was referring to my chiropractor payments and dental bills. The chiro payment is $50 a month and the dental is on a credit card, which is $40 a month. He went on to say it is because of my anxiety and I need to just stop. I am a stay at home mom and do not have a job. We have 4 children that I homeschool and on top of that I have to try and homeschool them while I am dealing with physical symptoms of anxiety.....and mental.
I literally feel like I am going to lose my mind. I feel like I am hanging on by a thread. I find it hard to deal with my children...I get so irritable with them and I just can't help it. This only makes my anxiety soar.
I am also in the process of weaning off of Klonopin.....I just feel like screaming right now. I want to run away, but I have no where to go. My children are my world, but I really feel like I am failing them in so many ways. I just want to be a normal person.
At the moment, I am having issues with urinating ALL the time and always feeling like I have to. I am awaiting tests to find out what is wrong with me. I initially thought it was anxiety, but it is not going away, so I am worrying about that as well.
I cannot express all of these things to my husband because he just doesn't understand....he is very selfish and thinks he is right about everything all the time. I am having a hard time dealing with him lately. I love him with all of my heart, but I just don't know how to cope.