Anxiety, or?

[kketchupp]

I have an issue that's been with me for years.

Everytime I get close to a boy, I have hard times to meet him, touch him and relax. I'm getting quiet and avoid having "cute" conversations

Like for example; I stayed at a "friends" house and we cuddled, and I laid on his shoulder and I got the biggest panic attack.

Another example: I got the same feeling with my ex when we were together. But after some weeks they were all gone.
I

But when me and a boy are only friends, then I can be myself completely and hug him and such without problems.

Do anyone know what this could be?

[stylist23]

I've been through this kind of with my current bf. when we first started dating I was calm and collected and in fact he would often be very nervous around me and I was able to remain calm. When we started getting serious and I realized I loved him I started getting nervous around him. He's such a sweetheart and really gentle and understanding but random times when we are cuddling or he's just holding me I have a panic attack. Bizarre. I don't know why it happens just thought id share my similar story.