Anxiety and friends.

[chardae]

So I am overthinking things as usual again and was just wondering if anyone out there is like me.

I was "popular" in high school had lots of friends partially cause I was a rebel. I really enjoyed being social etc. left school enveloped myself into online gaming was drinking a lot on my own. Lost a lot of my real life friends but was taking all day to people on the other side of the world where I could hide all of my issues which I loved. I have always enjoyed my own company, well not enjoyed as such but it doesn't bother me. I have very few friends, few new ones through my boyfriend which is nice but whenever we go out I sometimes get asked. "Where are your friends tonight" how do you answer that?

The few friends I have all have young children like me and can't always come out. Or online friends who don't live anywhere near me. I get along with Almost everyone I am told I am very likeable i love to make people smile and laugh and will go out of my way to help others. I can hide my issues well. It is only when I am really stressed that I sink into depression and all the awful stuff that goes with it.

So sorry for the long winded post, typing it all out feels so good. Excuse me if I make a few posts throughout the day. I woke up with the usual doom pit feeling in my stomach. Xx

[vonnhelsing]

That is the story of my life! Popular in high school, got obsessed With warcraft : p became a bit of a loner then developed anxiety and lost a lot of friends who just couldn't understand my unpredictability and my sudden freak outs.. now I have a few close friends who understand my disorder and help me get through it. Rather have just a few friends who actually care than lots of friends that walk in the opposite direction as soon as I start becoming a mess.

[Enduronman]

Holy shit there was a kid here last week that got that damn Warcraft for Christmas and then got anxiety like POW!!! TAKE THAT!!. I haven't seen him since...

@ Chardae, How do you answer that???...With 100% truthful honesty and quit trying to hide everything from everyone because I can see it anyway....and that's what anxiety and depression want you to do is to try to conceal it...but don't!...

Just answer with: "well, I really lost alot of them because I became an online gaming addict but I am done with that and looking to rebuild some friendships and make some new friends too by the way I'm Chardae..How are you?"...

That's what you say if you ever want out of this hell hole...stop "covering" it up....

IMHO..:)

[chardae]

So true!! I haven't been gaming for over a year. I do miss parts of it. I was sucked into world of Warcraft at 16 and I am 25 now!

[Enduronman]

That gaming stuff is the Devil in disguise...I DO NOT allow myself to play anything,..except this game!! And ,..we always win it too...:)

Just be honest, then you'll begin climbing your way back out..trust me, I've already been where you are....

E...:D

[chardae]

Thanks E :) many other things I need to change in my life. Motivation is a huge issue for me.

[Enduronman]

That'll follow,..honesty, truthfulness, openess....it's how the mind works friend....Yes, it will. :)

[AmberGbenga]

I agree with he-man, I can't exactly relate to you. I was very unpopular in high school.. Then when I hit 18 EVERYONE wanted to know me, people
From school everyone.. I have ugly duck syndrome, was hideous with a great personality, then I lost a lot of weight and became more attractive but kept my personality.. Guys from high school wanted to get in my pants, and girls wanted to be my friend.. It's weird how looks can change everything. But anyway, I don't even watch tv let alone play games, I'm too busy with life lol