Back to work and nervous!!

[anxiousga]

Hi all! So tomorrow I am going back to work after being off for the holidays. I am getting so nervous. I felt like I was doing better with my anxiety/depression over the break, but all day today I have been anxious just thinking about how I will feel at work tomorrow. I am afraid of losing it at work or feeling weird. I don't really understand why I am so afraid. I love my job and the people I work with. A couple weeks before the holiday break was when my anxiety struck and there were a lot of days that I had to leave work because I couldn't handle it. I am afraid I am going to feel like that again and fall back into the dark hole I was in before. I am getting so mad at myself for feeling like this again. I can't stop obsessing about my feelings. I am either anxious about feeling anxious or scared I am going to die at any second. What's a girl to do???

[jessed03]

How many selfies do you and your husband take? You guys still look cute though ;)

Hey, it's like first day at school right?

What if I get beat up?

What if I dont make friends?

You turn up all nervous, tense, sit in class quietly.

But, it's gotta done. A necessary evil! When you get there, and you laugh, and speak with friends, you're usually relaxed, and feel a little silly about getting so worked up about going.

Just... Go on regardless. The mind has many dimensions. You can still have these thoughts and get on with life. Then after a while of doing so, the mind gets the message that they arent needed, and they stop. :) I think you'll probably enjoy being back, being sociable and being busy.

And if anyone's mean to you... Come tell Jesse!

[anxiousga]

How many selfies do you and your husband take? You guys still look cute though ;) Hey, it's like first day at school right? What if I get beat up? What if I dont make friends? You turn up all nervous, tense, sit in class quietly. But, it's gotta done. A necessary evil! When you get there, and you laugh, and speak with friends, you're usually relaxed, and feel a little silly about getting so worked up about going. Just... Go on regardless. The mind has many dimensions. You can still have these thoughts and get on with life. Then after a while of doing so, the mind gets the message that they arent needed, and they stop. :) I think you'll probably enjoy being back, being sociable and being busy. And if anyone's mean to you... Come tell Jesse!

Thanks Jesse!! I know it is so silly to be afraid. I have this fear of feeling dizzy and then passing out or something crazy like that. When I get dizzy I can either be fine with the fact that I know it is anxiety or I second guess myself and think it is a brain tumor and I am about to die...ahhhhhhhh!! I want to feel normal again!!!!

Haha..the new pic is from last night on NYE, so I thought I would use it as the new picture. I know we are nerds, we do take lots of selfies.

[jessed03]

It's ok, it's not silly, just a reaction. Anxiety isnt a choice, otherwise none of us would feel us :p

Ah so your selfie is from NYE! Makes sense! You know what they say... A couple who selfies together, stays together! Or maybe it's goes to church. One of those two.

Good luck at work! What is it you do?

[anxiousga]

It's ok, it's not silly, just a reaction. Anxiety isnt a choice, otherwise none of us would feel us :p Ah so your selfie is from NYE! Makes sense! You know what they say... A couple who selfies together, stays together! Or maybe it's goes to church. One of those two. Good luck at work! What is it you do?

Haha! Yes, that is what they say about selfies.

I am a project manager for a company that plans together continual medical education meetings for oncologists. It's a pretty cool job, I get to travel a good bit to the meetings.

I will let you know how it goes tomorrow. Thanks for listening:)

[jessed03]

Anytime :) as jobs go, it doesn't sound too bad!

[Enduronman]

Goodluck and best wishes today Debbie!!!...:)

[anxiousga]

Goodluck and best wishes today Debbie!!!...:)

Thank you :) so far so good!! (Knock on wood)

[Perses]

I hope your day at work went well. It must be tough to work in oncology, even at a remove. So, I praise you for doing important work. It's absolutely true that one of the most frustrating things about anxiety is feeling anxious about being anxious. blah! It's hard to trust your feelings.

I'm curious as to why you worry that you'll "die at any second"? Do you think that's connected to your work on cancer?

[anxiousga]

I hope your day at work went well. It must be tough to work in oncology, even at a remove. So, I praise you for doing important work. It's absolutely true that one of the most frustrating things about anxiety is feeling anxious about being anxious. blah! It's hard to trust your feelings. I'm curious as to why you worry that you'll "die at any second"? Do you think that's connected to your work on cancer?

I did it!! My day went well :) I was super busy all day so I was able to keep my mind of me and my feelings. Yay!! I hope I feel like this again tomorrow.

I have always been nervous about everything health related and everything else really. It just recently got really bad. I have been so afraid that I am going to have stroke or die from a brain tumor. If I am dizzy or see spots I automatically think the worst! Working with oncology heightens my anxiety a little but not too much. I am more involved in the logistics and meeting planning so I don't get too deep into the actual content of the presentations. I am just always scared something bad will happen. I am really trying hard to live in the moment and enjoy life as it is happening. It is just so hard.

[jessed03]

Glad it went well for you anxga!

[Enduronman]

YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!! Great news!!!! :D

[anxiousga]

Thanks guys!! I am scared I am going to jinx it!!!