So much harder than I thought .__.

[ThousandMiles]

Hey guys,

So, I'm feeling pretty stupid and naive right now :/ When I first found out that I had anxiety and depression AND that it can be cured, I was really hopeful. As hopeful as you can feel with such negative thoughts flying around your head all the time.
But now, I'm starting to realise that I can't just reveal everything on my mind in 40 minute sessions and discover how to make it stop. And now I'm trialling some medication, which apparently might not even work, and if it does, then obviously it will take a while to kick in + there will be side effects.
And I'm starting to worry that maybe a lot of the messed up things I don't like about myself are just... the way I am. And not my anxiety or depression at all. I don't want to be like this, and I don't want to be alone forever :(

And I realise that it really is US who have to deal with OUR illnesses, and that the other things are just tools that can help us... but I really don't feel in control of things at all. It's all so much harder than I thought and I want it to just stop. Why is recovery so difficult? :'(

Anyone else feeling like this? :/

[mikecole114]

Hey guys, So, I'm feeling pretty stupid and naive right now :/ When I first found out that I had anxiety and depression AND that it can be cured, I was really hopeful. As hopeful as you can feel with such negative thoughts flying around your head all the time. But now, I'm starting to realise that I can't just reveal everything on my mind in 40 minute sessions and discover how to make it stop. And now I'm trialling some medication, which apparently might not even work, and if it does, then obviously it will take a while to kick in + there will be side effects. And I'm starting to worry that maybe a lot of the messed up things I don't like about myself are just... the way I am. And not my anxiety or depression at all. I don't want to be like this, and I don't want to be alone forever :( And I realise that it really is US who have to deal with OUR illnesses, and that the other things are just tools that can help us... but I really don't feel in control of things at all. It's all so much harder than I thought and I want it to just stop. Why is recovery so difficult? :'( Anyone else feeling like this? :/


I feel exactly the same
I'm fed up of being like this
I too am on medication and had a couple of counselling and agree that a couple of sessions won't make a difference.
I don't wanna be this person anymore but I'm not sure whether I don't want to have anxiety and depression or i don't wanna be me...
I decided tonight that if I could die and it not be a problem I would but I'm too pussy to do anything but I know any future I have will be rubbish If I'm like this I jus don't enjoy anything anymore

[Lee Grant Irons]

Hi ThousandMiles,

Yes, it is a lot of personal effort that is required to begin to turn things around. Much of my depression was associated with the way I was. However, the fact that you recognize it and are not completely satisfied with it means that you do have some power to change it. I just posted chapter 2 of my own story on my blog (url in my signature below) where I talk about these things and what I did to start turning my life around. I hope that it has something that you can use, that could give you some more of those tools that could help you.