Self hate and realationships

[mikecole114]

How can I ever expect/ want anyone to like me when I hate myself????

:(
So alone

[Lee Grant Irons]

Then don't do anything for the purpose of trying to get anyone to like you. Just do nice/good things for other people because it is the right thing to do. This will go a long way in helping you like yourself. Also, a good sense of humor and self-deprecation goes a long way. It is good to laugh at ourselves as frequently as possible.

Let the "liking" take care of itself. It will.

[mikecole114]

Can i ask what sort of help are you getting for your depression .

Thank you for your replies. Firstly I do laugh at myself maybe to much I almost make myself the victim of every joke but this has given others the idea that it's okay to do the same which constantly makes me think maybe they are right. I'm on meds and did some counselling I seem to have got worse I'm in a 12 week waiting lost for cbt

[Steven Daws]

You will find someone, there are a lot of people out there, and there will be someone who will like you for who you are. :)

[Lee Grant Irons]

Thank you for your replies. Firstly I do laugh at myself maybe to much I almost make myself the victim of every joke but this has given others the idea that it's okay to do the same which constantly makes me think maybe they are right. I'm on meds and did some counselling I seem to have got worse I'm in a 12 week waiting lost for cbt

There is a healthy way to laugh at yourself and there is an unhealthy way. When I find myself shaking my head and telling myself in frustration that I am such an idiot, that is not so healthy I think. However, when I am trying to forget about myself and focus on the needs and desires of other people, trying to help other people, then I find that when I makes mistakes, my laughing at myself seems to be a healthier form. I find it very refreshing to be doing something like working on a food drive for the poor with a bunch of people and being silly (as in Monty Python silly) while doing it. It helps me and everyone laugh and enjoy ourselves while we are working. Doing things for other people and taking our minds off of ourselves is very mentally therapeutic, especially for people with mental and physical illnesses. And finding opportunities to be involved in this kind of think also helps me find and build friendships. This is very different than joking around at a beer party and making ourselves the brunt of every joke. This latter is not so healthy I think.

[mikecole114]

There is a healthy way to laugh at yourself and there is an unhealthy way. When I find myself shaking my head and telling myself in frustration that I am such an idiot, that is not so healthy I think. However, when I am trying to forget about myself and focus on the needs and desires of other people, trying to help other people, then I find that when I makes mistakes, my laughing at myself seems to be a healthier form. I find it very refreshing to be doing something like working on a food drive for the poor with a bunch of people and being silly (as in Monty Python silly) while doing it. It helps me and everyone laugh and enjoy ourselves while we are working. Doing things for other people and taking our minds off of ourselves is very mentally therapeutic, especially for people with mental and physical illnesses. And finding opportunities to be involved in this kind of think also helps me find and build friendships. This is very different than joking around at a beer party and making ourselves the brunt of every joke. This latter is not so healthy I think.

Yeah I think I mostly do the latter type.
But yeah there's a charity in my uni out called muted and they help men deal with depression and I contacted them and they want to involve me in spreading awareness at the university it feels good to possibly help someone eles and be involved in a charity so hopefully after the new year I will begin to help others like you!