Just because I know I have anxiety....

[joey9]

I am struggling with the following:

1) Just because I know I worry a lot, doesn't mean that bad things aren't going to happen to me.
2) Just because I know I catatrophise doesn't mean that the worst possible scenario won't happen.
3) If I am prepared for the worst at all times, I won't feel as bad when the bad things do happen.

I am sure all of these thought processes are bad for me, and they leave me in a constant state of worry and doom, but I don't see any way around them. If I make the anxiety go away, then will I be prepared for bad news? I would like to think I am crazy to think this way but sometimes I see it as being sensible. Does anyone else think like this? I just want to be happy go lucky like normal people and take the knocks on the chin but I can't change my mindset. Any solutions?

[Robbed]

I think that people often see making changes as impossible because you just can't do it with the snap of a finger. And because the same old, bad ways of thinking keep coming back over and over again, they see the situation as hopeless. The thing to remember here is that these ways of thinking have probably been with you for a VERY long time. And they won't just go away because you now no longer want them. They will take time and effort to change. And there is no way around that. The key here, of course, is being patient and persistent - especially when things aren't going really well. Expect it to be difficult and take time to change, and don't be disappointed when things don't seem to be going easy.

As for being prepared for 'bad news', as yourself this. Does 'bad news' hit you any less hard when you are 'prepared' for it? From my experience, it really doesn't. And I wouldn't think things would be too different for you. So think about that. The cost to benefit ratio of constantly being 'prepared' for the worst is actually not very favorable.

[joey9]

This is so true - and the longer I go on with these negative thoughts the more fears I accumulate. I am now fearful of so many things for fear they will bring bad news, for example the postman, my phone or an answer phone message, checking my emails, reading the newspapers etc. etc. I think if I don't address this properly now I will end up living as a hermit in a small cave somewhere. I don't want to go the drugs way so I have started off with a new self-help regime. Diet overhaul, supplements, CBT self-help books. The problem is once this particular crisis (as I see it) is over I will feel fine for a while and think that I am cured, which of course I won't be, I will have just 'survived' one small hurdle, and this in itself will no doubt leave some scarring in the form of another phobia. I am still too scared to seek professional help as I can't imagine telling anyone what goes on in my mind - I can't believe anyone could possibly understand so I will try to fix it myself first.

[gaugreg1x]

:unsure: I do not htink your thoughts are as rare as you may think, I am also a catastrophizer (as you say) in many respects.

[joey9]

Grim isn't it? I can find potential disaster in pretty much every situation you could imagine.

[Robbed]

Remember that this is all just habitual worry. And this includes worrying that you can't stop worrying. The reason why it seems so 'part of who you are' is that it has been learned and practiced for years. It's kind of like you have gone to college and gotten a degree in this. But just as worry has been learned, not worrying can also be learned. Not that it is going to be easy. But it is DEFINITELY worthwhile. After all, there is a good chance you can overcome an anxiety condition without dealing with this. But if you don't, then it will likely return periodically.

As for seeking professional help, this may or may not be necessary. See how you do on your own for a while. But be patient, as this takes time. As for telling a therapist about your problems, they are trained and paid to listen to them. And, as for thinking that your problems are strange or different, keep in mind that they hear about this sort of stuff all the time. On the other hand, what I have found to be bad about therapy is (1) the general incompetence of most therapists out there, and (2) having pills thrown in your face. Even a therapist or psychologist (neither of whom can prescribe meds) will likely be poking you with a cattle prod to see a GP/psychiatrist to get on medication ASAP. And this is probably one of the most irritating things about therapy.

[James44]

Another thing that helped me get through some of the rougher times in anxiety is a 12 step program, like AA or NA. You dont have to be an addict or alcoholic to go to open meetings and the people are generally very nice there.

:D