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donkeyfuel
12-05-2013, 10:13 AM
Hello all. Just in case anyone wonders about the name its my psn username and just use it as an alias anymore.
Have had anxiety for years which I'm sure a lot of it stems from an abusive childhood. But the past year has been hell. I'll try and keep it short but found out my wife was pregnant after years of not being able to which was good news, but happened when I was unemployed and broke as hell. Started drinking a lot to come with that stress and started a very challenging job in politics. Shortly after getting through a pretty bad delivery (drs just seemed to have their heads in their butts to say it nicely which turned into an emergency c section and five days without sleep), was in a car wreck while sitting at a red light, put on many pain killers to cope with that (lortabs being one). Months go by and was eating through pills like skittles until I got ulcers and other misc GI issues from it which I just went cold turkey from all the pills cus they were making it worse and that's when it all went to hell. Started having non ending panic for weeks, couldn't hold in food for four months and since have been crippled with panic and derealization. In my defense the drs never told me how addicting hydrocodone was and was giving them to me by the droves. Even longer story short I found out that everyone in my moms side of the family has suffered with ocd and panic and now here I am a year later. Haven't been able to get any real help from drs and have been to quite a few including the er. But glad to find a forum with people going through the same thing