Searching for anything good...(sigh)

[Enduronman]

It's been awhile since I was last here. I thought I'd sign in for abit to see what's been going on. Hey newbies, hey veterans. Still waiting on some sort of medal for being able to deal with all this intense pressure, but it's just usually more added intesified pressures instead. I say WTF alot, for sure.

I've read through some of the posts. They are all generally something that I had seen or read before. Even though we're all unique, and one of a kind, the symptoms are quite common. Everybody has anxiety, it's there for a reason. The problem is when anxiety, has you. Extremely tough to deal with at times. Most definately and assuredly. Been there, done that. It can be exhausting.

Sometimes I think that the best way to even attempt to overcome this mental health issue, is to realize that there are countless others out here in the world that are having a hard time too, just in varying degrees of a hard time. Different levels of "stress". Just when I think it can't get any worse and maybe things are working out, something else happens tougher than the other last issue at hand. It's a cycle. I just wish I could figure out the exact patterns, I can't. I'm still searching for something good daily, trust me. It's elusive. But, I still have to try.

Just for perspective, here's some of my own problems, if they aren't to tough to read through. Maybe, you'll read them and the words will impact you in a way that makes you think to yourself for a minute about your own struggles and how they affect you. I'll try to keep is as short as possible. Goodluck!

1. Disease. I have one. Rare. Deadly. Destroyed my entire life, took everything I owned, left me with nothing other than this disturbed mind. Hilarious.
2. Mental health disorders. All of them. Lucky me.
3. Disability. All of my joints are damaged. They hurt everyday. Relentless.
4. Uncontrolled limb movements. Episodes of ataxia. It looks like I have cerebral palsy at times, but I don't.
5. Further tests. They're still searching for this disease, but there is no test designed to find it available. Vial, after vial. I have an MRI coming up on December 9th, my birthday. Another needle stuck in my spine. For contrast of course. Happy Birthday!
6. Shots. One in my leg every 3rd day, one in my ass every Tuesday.
7. My oldest daughter just had her second son, I didn't get to meet him nor will I ever. She put him up for adoption. She's a drug addict. His name was Camden. 8 weeks in a NICU. 7lb baby drug addict. Holes in his heart. Possible brain damage.
8. The State forced her to give her first son away to a relative, he's 3. He got into her pills and went to the ER. He survived.
9. My youngest daughter got caught with weed in October. A huge mess. She quit smoking weed though, and started smoking meth instead.
10. It's the Holidays, and I'm a tiny bit stressed. I will be getting back on xanax tomorrow, after one year without it. I have no choice, that's what it's for.

So, to me, it seems abit hard to find something good here but I do still have hope and that's really all we have anyway.

Look for positives, they are out there and maybe they're already right in front of you anyway if you'd just really open your eyes.

Happy Holidays!

E-Man..:)

[tailspin]

Hey E-Man. Happy Holidays to you too. I don't have much to add other than to say that I like the way you write and I like your attitude. When I read your post I was drawn to you and just want to say thanks for sharing that. Thanks also for the reminder to look for something positive.

Wishing you the best!

[Enduronman]

Well Thank you much Tailspin! Through all that stuff, I had hope that today would be better and it has been so far. I had my eyes checked to be sure that there was no metal fragments in them after 30 years of grinding, cutting, sheet steel and other metals. Nothing in them! You have to know those things before you lay in an MRI. It's a giant magnet that will remove the metal whether you want it out or not. I will still have eyes when the tests is done. YAY!! I also found another used tire for my youngest daughters car because I won't buy a new one. She runs over s**t and seems to have an uncanny ability to damage the car every other week or so. I went out one morning and the hood was crushed. I got her outside to ask about it? She just said "What dent?". BAAHAA!!! Uh, that giant one in the hood!!! That's why I bought her a 92 Honda. It's like a demo derby car more or less. LMAO!! Just waiting to hear from the pharmacy now as I get my xanax and some abilify ($800 a month) so I hope it's friggin awesome for that much!!

Make this day a great day friend!

It's gotta be better than being stuck in sh**ty Indiana!! :)

[mykids12]

Im so sorry! If they're not sure what the disease is that you have then how do they know it's deadly? You sound very positive for having such a rough time. Wish I could be that way :)

[Lee Grant Irons]

Hello Eman,

Thanks for the welcome. Love your sarcasm. It can be helpful in dealing with it all. Sounds like you have an ample start on your intractable problem list. How DO you deal with that problem of living in Indiana? LOL

[Enduronman]

Hey YourKids and LGI!
Relapsing polychondritis: It can cause deafness, blindness, dissolve my trachea so I choke, and or dissolve my heart valves. None of which, I would find all that pleasant and comforting. At least wait until Christmas is over!! LOL!
Sarcasm is the only way to down play extremely serious and terrifyingly horrifying life issues friend, intractable problems, CHECK!! HAAAHA!!
I'd rather live in a nice comfy cave..and live on grass, sticks and twigs. Wait, I already do!! (well, minus the cave part) :)

[tailspin]

Hey YourKids and LGI!
Relapsing polychondritis: It can cause deafness, blindness, dissolve my trachea so I choke, and or dissolve my heart valves. None of which, I would find all that pleasant and comforting. At least wait until Christmas is over!! LOL!
Sarcasm is the only way to down play extremely serious and terrifyingly horrifying life issues friend, intractable problems, CHECK!! HAAAHA!!
I'd rather live in a nice comfy cave..and live on grass, sticks and twigs. Wait, I already do!! (well, minus the cave part) :)

REALLY sorry you're dealing with this condition, E-Man, but I LOVE your sense of humor! I used to have a good sense of humor myself, but it's fallen by the wayside somewhat thanks to my relentless depression and anxiety issues, coupled with the hormonal roller-coaster of approaching menopause! It's inspiring to say the least that you can write about these things with so much humor, E-Man! Thanks for reminding me that a sense of humor is one of the most important tools in the mental health/illness tool chest, and thanks for making me laugh!

Hope the Xanax and Abilify help and good luck with your upcoming MRI!

PS: What does the second line of your avatar say? I can only read the top line!

[Lee Grant Irons]

Polychondritis. So all of the differential diagnoses have been ruled out? Or are you just cherry picking? LOL

[Enduronman]

Gotta have a sense of humor, to live through this hell!!
Then, you wake up and find yourself in physical therapy like I did today...YAY!!!
After that I went out to the Doctor's office to see if my blood test results were in yet. They were. She said no I'm not going to die yet. YEAH!!!
Also told her that her prescription for my anxiety to "Be sure to drink yer Ovaltine" is complete bullshit and I want my xanax NOW!!!
She pushed a button, and said it's at the pharmacy now dude so CALM DOWN!!! OK!!!
So, snap out of the funk friends and go be awnry to someone today..they'll appreciate it. :)

[Lee Grant Irons]

So, snap out of the funk friends and go be awnry to someone today..they'll appreciate it. :)

Thumbs up! You have to push on these doctors sometimes. I have fired doctors. And I have even been fired by doctors. LOL

[Enduronman]

Yeah buddy! Already got em, and man what a difference already. It is still hands down the best anti-anxiety medication in this entire Universe. :)
Oh, and my testosterone level is that of an 18 yr old boy I learned today. Actually it's 109 points higher, but who's countin... (I'm 45)
Is that why I can rip a phone book in half with wool mittens on?..BAHAAAHA!!!

[tailspin]

Thumbs up! You have to push on these doctors sometimes. I have fired doctors. And I have even been fired by doctors. LOL

Totally agree with this!! You always have to be your own advocate and that can sometimes mean having to fight (or fire!) your own doctor in order to get the best treatment.

[Lee Grant Irons]

Yeah buddy! Already got em, and man what a difference already. It is still hands down the best anti-anxiety medication in this entire Universe. :)
Oh, and my testosterone level is that of an 18 yr old boy I learned today. Actually it's 109 points higher, but who's countin... (I'm 45)
Is that why I can rip a phone book in half with wool mittens on?..BAHAAAHA!!!

Not losing any hair yet, I take it.

[Enduronman]

Hey Tail, the avatar says "I just saved 100% on stress, by switching to not giving a f***...HAAHA!!
Hey Grant, nope I look like Chewbacca!!...:)

[tailspin]

hey tail, the avatar says "i just saved 100% on stress, by switching to not giving a f***...haaha!!
Hey grant, nope i look like chewbacca!!...:)


Lmao!!! :-) :-)

[Enduronman]

Success!!! Laughter!!! ...the best "OMG I think I'm going to die" reliever....:)

[Enduronman]

Twas the day before Thursday when all through this old ass house,...
My daughter comes in and says "I know who commited that robbery at gunpoint last week"....(sigh)
ok, lay it on me!! She did, names, photos, stories, now I've gotta "plan" how to meet with the Lt. A buddy of mine, thank God.
Oh well, it's just "how" I'm wired I guess. I know exactly how to deal with the dumbasses of this World.
Hope he enjoys his holidays, in prison. Idiot!!!
Merry Christmas f**ker!

LMAO!! :)

[Lee Grant Irons]

E-man,

I have read that hair loss and polychondritis go together. So if you are as hairy as Chewbacca, then maybe it's not polychondritis.

[Enduronman]

BAHAAAHA!!! Tis not the polychondritis that takes the hair away friend, tis the toxic nuclear sludge medications that cost $15,000.00 a year that taketh thy hair away. They're NOT injecting that shit into me I can gaurentee you that friend!! I would rather be suffering in pain, but know that all of my internal organs are functioning at 100% capacity..That I do know. My blood test read like I'm in tip top condition, but obviously I'm not. The medications (dmards, biologics) are like chemo therapy. Not for me!! :)

[Enduronman]

Hi all from sunny Indiana!! yeah right...it's beginning to look alot like a real friggin mess out there, or Christmas, whatever your preference.
Xanax XR: holy shit I hadn't slept that good in an entire year, maybe I should try out for a part in that walking dead dumbasses show.
Abilify: uhhhhhhhh wut wuz i suppost ta be durin? LOL!
Nothing has yet to break, fail, now explode yet today so maybe, just maybe, it's going to be a great day!!!
Have a good day. :)

E-Man.

[Lee Grant Irons]

Nothing has yet to break, fail, now explode yet today so maybe, just maybe, it's going to be a great day!!!

Wish I could say the same. One son just got a puled over for a dead break light and a cracked windshield. Bright side is he could have been fined for speeding also, but they gave him a pass on that. Virginia is really over the top when it comes to ensuring everyone is operating with perfect equipment on the road, which is never the case for my family. I haven't bought a new car since I was young and foolish. LOL

[Enduronman]

Ah yes, LGI,
My youngest has to pay a ticket by this Friday for not having her license, in her possession, in the car..but she has one. $128.00.
That was 2 weeks after the stupid (one marijuana joint) found in her car. Oh my. They wanted "us" to both join their IOP therapy group. I refuse. I am not sitting in any group, I have my own abundance of troubles already. Plus, my 17 yr old is my clone. We would be fine, everyone else in there wouldn't be.
We're meeting with an individual IOP councelor at 5 today, in the most awesome looking rehab in town. Rather than sitting in a shithole detention center and listening to the boys scream, cuss, yell, and fart for our amusement while sitting in the waiting room. Their "supervisor" ignored them. I was ready to strangle them all, kindly of course. HAAHA!!! :)

[Enduronman]

Yesterday was less than eventful. Yay!! (rare)
I got the councelor that I wanted for my teen Viking daughter. He has a giant fishtank in his office, it's calming and relaxing to minimize her Tazmanian Devil Disorder.
Also got the call from the Neurologist. The appointment is set for the 23rd. I think he's going to try to explain why I had short-circuited like a dumbass. Nerves in the neck.
Got my new glasses too, look even more like a dumbass I'm sure. But, I can see. Sight isn't over-rated.
Not looking forward to giving myself a shot in the stomach, the medication arrived, but if it will help get me back into shape and working out like I used too then so be it. It's only a needle..
Oh and it looks alot like Christmas out there now too. Lots of snow, reminds me of the land of our ancestors...Sweden. No wonder they left there.
For any of you out there that are psychotic (agoraphobia, hypochondriac) and have insurance, ask for some (abilify) because it's very pricey $800 a month, but it works fast. You'll forget what you were even worried about to begin with. Plus, it's really helpful for IED and I don't want to tear everyone and everything apart. I like it!

Have a great day!

E-Man. :)

[tailspin]

Glad the meds are working so well for you, even though that price is painful. Ouch! Good luck at your neurology appointment.

[Enduronman]

Oh wait, not so fast!!!

It was going great, until a ate dinner last night and shortly thereafter, I got the hiccups. For 3 hours.
I thought NOTHING of this until after I ate breakfast this morning and of course, I got hiccups again. For 3 more hours.
I called the Doc (while hiccuping uncontrollably) and told her what I'm dealing with now.
Today, I was choking, wanted to heave, hiccups for hours, chest pains, and a partridge in a pear tree.
She said "Yes, that happens in <1% of people that take Abilify" so don't take anymore until Monday to be sure that it is truly the cause.
Oh goodie! So, on Monday, when I have a friggin MRI scheduled, I will have hiccups, choking, ready to throw up, and the Radiologist is going to be telling me to sit still!!!
On my Birthday!!!!!
hmmmm,....I'm guessing that me and Abilify aren't going to play nicely together. Damn it! (other then all that, it was great) LMAO!!

E-Man..grrrrrrr :/

[Enduronman]

12 1/2 hours of hiccups are a son of a bitch. Frustrating, and painful. My chest hurts like hell, but they're over with for now. Geeze!!!
I believe it is the xanax XR. Whatever they use to make that medication XR, is what is causing it. Not taking that shit today!!
I'll go back to what I KNOW worked and didn't have any side effects.
So far, so good.
Abilify? Friggin awesome, if you've got insurance. None of that "build up in yer system" bullshit either. Wow...
Make this day a great day!!

E-man. :)

[tailspin]

That really sucks about the marathon hiccups, E-man. Glad they've stopped for now. And hope that laying off the Xanax XR will keep them away (hopefully regular Xanax is ok)

[Enduronman]

Yes, and they're back like the mother-in-law that you weren't hoping to greet till next Xmas!!!!
ALL I did was drink a cup of coffee.
Now, I know what it is that I of course, suddenly, have...GERD.
OMG there isn't even any warning signs for anything that hits me!!! Just, POW!!! Take that!!!!
It is exactly how it's always been..........:|

[Enduronman]

ahhhhh...normalcy has returned.
After nearly 15 hours of hiccups since Thursday evening, they are now gone (defeated).
It got so bad yesterday that I drove to 2 different care centers, one of which was closed, the other had a two hour wait..
So, I had to choose the pharmacy and everyone knows me there anyway. It takes drugs to make this machine work correctly.
As Brad suggested, it is now working today. Yes, it was GER and not quite yet GERD..I will survive another day and drink some coffee without wearing it.
I always thought that Larry the Cable Guy was a complete dumbass, but he does have a good point in his prilosec commercials, although I don't eat the garbage that he's sitting in front of in those advertisements...
Maybe, A great day!! :)

[Enduronman]

I created something good, rathering than waiting for it.
I had gone to the pharmacy to pick up my daughters anti-anxiety meds an hour ago and to thank them for their advice about this GERD crap.
I left and while sitting at the stoplight, I saw an old dude holding up a sign that says "Homeless Vet, will work for food"..
I wasn't prepared to offer him any work, I have none to do.
So, I went to the next grocery store and went inside to get him some food instead.
I only spent $21.00. But, it's food anyways.
I went back to find him and thought he was gone but saw him sitting in the pine trees, its windy, cold, snowing.
I pulled up and waived him over and asked him if he had a penny?
He just reached in his pocket and pulled out one penny. It was all that he had.
I asked for that penny, and he gave it to me.
I then got out and opened the trunk to hand him his bags of food.
He said "God bless you man!"...
He then also asked about the purpose of that penny?
I told him. When I was young, my father told me that "No good deed will go unpunished for you"....That has stuck with me for my entire life.
Whenever I had tried to do a good deed, to help another, something terrible would follow that same day.
However, I outsmarted, that curse...with that single penny.
In the eyes of the Universe, or whomever or whatever it is, and, or was, that has punished me my whole life, for doing good unto others, is convinced that he "bought that food"...
For 1 cent.
Today, I will be blessed in some way, instead. And as of now, I am and can feel it in my heart. I see that mans eyes light up when he saw,...food.

I may not look all that fluffy, nice, kind, and I also will not present all fluffy, nice, or kind either...but I do care.
I will try to force change, not enable continued suffering....that's just how I work.

Best wishes!

(try helping someone else today, and see how you feel then)....:)

[tailspin]

Great story, E-Man. And really kind of you.

I agree that helping others in turn helps us to feel good. Animals are my big thing. In fact, after reading your post, I'm going to go online and make another donation to one of my favorite animal rights/animal rescue organizations. Thanks for that, E-man!

[Enduronman]

Yes!!
It is really one of the only things that truly makes me feel "better" inside..Kindness. I'm just not real good at trying to conceal the hardness on the exterior, but I'm workin on it daily friend..
Have a great day TS! :D

[Enduronman]

I was protected from the family curse today, my daughter was not.
I just figured out why she is so upset, and didn't want to talk about it.
Someone stole the money she had saved up to treat her nephew to a museum, and for his Christmas gifts. $100.00.
It was taken out of her car, while getting gas at a station.
I know where she leaves her purse, wallet, when she's doing things like that and leaving them unattended and I have already made her aware of this invitation and possibility of a loss and theft dozens of times, she chose to ignore them. Now, she learns her own hard lesson even though I gave her the knowledge to prevent it.
Am I going to give the money back to her to replace, what she lost, with her own complacency and ignorence?
Nope...her loss, is not my sudden emergency.
Will she learn from it?
Doubtful, she's 17..
In time.....
Happy Holidays!

[Lee Grant Irons]

I wish kids were born with a book of 20 coupons that parents could use for those "You really need to listen to me this time" moments. LOL

[Enduronman]

Especially the two daughters I had to raise OMGAWWDDD!!

[Lee Grant Irons]

especially the two daughters i had to raise omgawwddd!!

I have 5 kids, 3 older boys and 2 younger girls, and they are all this way. LOL

[Enduronman]

geeze it's been a non stop 7 years of Jerry Springer, Cops, and Jackass all rolled into one!!! I wish I had a rocket cart to put them into sometimes...BAAAAAHA!!! Oh well, you reap what you sew and if you read all that crap in the game sections about "have you ever" then those are what I used to do for fun...they are equally as amusing. eessshhhh....:)

[Enduronman]

You are a Warrior as well bruh!! I have a son too but he is nothing like the girls, a new pair of shoes and a ball and he's set. The girls, everything else!

[Enduronman]

I love my girls, but maybe you could see why they present some difficulties....:|
755

[Enduronman]

Well, today is MRI day. I am going to make this fun. Even though laying in a $2million dollar tube filled with giant magnets that bang around doesn't sound all that appealing at the moment. I am going to mess with the radiologist, and pretend that I'm claustraphobic, before they even slide me in. I am going to have fake panic attacks. I am going to act as if I'm hyper-ventilating. I am going to act as if I may vomit at any second, all over them. I am going to act like Will Ferrell in Elf when he's sitting in the Doctor's office..what's that, why is that there, how does that work...and I am going to ask if they will at least let me hold a teddy bear.

Do you think I'm kidding?

Nope! BAAHAAAHA!!!

[Lee Grant Irons]

Do you have an elf hat to wear?

[Enduronman]

I bet I could find one around here!! Great idea! ABAHAA!!! :)

[artaud]

Well, today is MRI day...I am going to act like Will Ferrell in Elf when he's sitting in the Doctor's office..what's that, why is that there, how does that work...
Have fun, sounds like you're planning to. LOL.

[Enduronman]

Heck yes!! Why? It's my own manner of self-inflicted anxiety calming therapy while in a stressful situation. Act like a complete dumbass, it masks the OMG!!! :)

[Enduronman]

I called them to ask if they provide some calming music for me to listen too and they said yes, I asked if they have Pantera, Metallica, or Disturbed?....It got really silent.

I did find a giant 4' tall teddy bear here, maybe I'll walk in with that...:)

[Enduronman]

I got a new added plan, I will answer EVERY question that they ask with "must have sedative"....I won't say anything else. Hilarious!!

[tailspin]

LOL!! Can't wait to hear all about how it went......;)

[tailspin]

I love my girls, but maybe you could see why they present some difficulties....:|
755

Wow, you have a couple of gorgeous girls there, E-Man. But I thought they had drug problems? Shouldn't they be missing a few teeth or at least have really bad skin or something? They look way too good!! Then again, I know your body can take a lot of abuse when you're young and it doesn't show on the outside.

Anyhow, your daughters are stunning!

[Enduronman]

Why thank you TS.

Yes, the oldest has a serious drug problem and it pisses me off because she is having tooth loss, but won't do a thing about it even though I'd arranged for it to be free.
The youngest has experimented with just about everything, but I knew it and she lives here. She knows what I'll do, if she fails again. They both got 3 strikes. This one has 2....YAY!! :)

[Enduronman]

The MRI went great, music, painless. So did the xrays although not so painless twisting my ankles. Then of course leave there and go get a shot in my arse..and gettin ready to stick another needle in my stomach..Yippee!!! Bring on the syringes!!! BAHAA!!
So then I thought heck yes, it's my B-day so maybe I'll do something daring like eat a piece of turkey or drink a beer..to come home and see that someone had pryed open my gas cover on one of my cars and taken the damn gas cap and gas too!!! So, celebration can wait because now I gotta go get a locking gas cap!!! And they broke the friggin door latch!!....A day, in the life, of The Whipping Boy of The Universe..YES!!! :D

[tailspin]

Glad it went well. Bummer about the stolen gas :(

Happy Birthday, mate!!!!!!

http://i105.photobucket.com/albums/m231/Joanna_078/funnypenguinbday.jpg (http://s105.photobucket.com/user/Joanna_078/media/funnypenguinbday.jpg.html)

[Enduronman]

BHAAHAAHA!!! Thank you!..:)

[artaud]

Happy Birthday, mate!!!!!!



I second that!!

[Lee Grant Irons]

Birthday? I guess I missed that. Well happy birthday Eman! I'm glad you are in the world!

[AmberGbenga]

Happy birthday!! :) no rest for the wicked I guess! Haha

[jessed03]

Happy bday E-man!

Little bit of advice:

Don't eat the cake.
Don't open any gifts.
Don't go on an outing with anyone.
Don't even open the door.

There are gonna be a LOT of people looking to get you back ;)

[Enduronman]

Oh don't worry bruh!! I will follow your advice and thank you friend!!! :)

[Enduronman]

And thank you Lee, Amber, Kevin and Artaud!! It's nice of you all to send wishes this way cuz I need all I can get! :D

[Enduronman]

46th birthday...
Ugh..It was ok but I wouldv'e much rather not go to hospitals, have tests, get shots, return home to a vandalized car, theft, and then realized that it has to be ME that types a report to a lead investigator (friend though) of the local PD because for some reason my daughter has keen knowledge of the perp in an armed robbery, and she also has information that he is planning to leave the state on the 19th so I have to get this done. The report is typed, sealed, on the mailbox for him to pick up this am. Geeze...Plus, my daughter hates this kid too and she had said that he's pulled his gun on 2 other people in the past 2 weeks...It will be my pleasure to take him out of society.
On the bright side, there will more than likely be a reward especially for a crime like that. And of course, being disabled but able to type for awhile may just help us out especially my daughter. It'll bring her "tude" up after a guy stole money from her 2 weeks ago, an x bf was threatening to damage our cars, she had another flat tire, someone got into her car and stole her xmas savings for her nephew, then this added car damage and gas theft two nights ago...To be able to replace what she's lost, would make her smile and bring her back into having a sense of trust, in humanity and the universe. (sigh)....
She's got it right, she nailed this one, she suspects the right kid, and she will more than likely save a life including his own if he's this fuggin stupid to rob stores of a little bit of money and cigarettes because if I would've been around at that time and observed an event like this taking place then he wouldn't be on the streets of this city at the moment posting s**t on his social site about how tough he thinks he is...he'd be missing both knees, permanently. He may be armed but he isn't armed like I am, legally. And oddly enough, he wouldn't be as calm as I am about knee removal with a 9... BAAAHA!!!
This is me hoping that this day, is less than eventful, for myself, my kids, my family, and all of you too. Some, or many, will have a better day..with no CSI!!! LOL!

Do something positive today friends!

E-Man. :)

[Lee Grant Irons]

Keep up the good work in trenches, Eman! I'm heading in to the corporate trenches this morning! LOL Hopefully I won;t have to take someone out at the knees in a knock-down drag-out meeting!

[Enduronman]

Thank you bruh but this trench warfare is getting real old after 46 yrs!!! Good luck in the Corp friend and I'm sure you'll make things good happen. YEAH!!!

[Enduronman]

Ok. Trench Warfare seems to continue...well that's weird. Hmmm, what to do?
My oldest (drug addict) daughter just came over to give me some of her own reports about my youngest (drug using) daughter.
I wanted to say, "You're one to talk" but I didn't. I just listened and wished for this moment to end once she quit slurrrrriiinnggg her words.
Why am I not freaking out or concerned? Because I created her, and I know that she is capable of pulling herself out of the shit hole she put herself into. I can't.
Needless to say, the report (if even true) was abit unsettleing. According to her, her younger sis is running around with a guy that just got out of prison, for selling coke.
Hmmm,...Maybe it just may turn out to be another CSI day. Actually, they're kind of amusing because I have friends in high places and can know everything about anyone within 3 minutes,, especially if they're criminals.
If this brief investigation proves to be true, I will have others swoop in and pick him back up to return to the iron jungle, that of which, he may belong in anyway.
Hopefully, he enjoyed his brief reprieve and freedom but he stepped into the exact wrong place, that he should have..near my daughter.
Even though my girls are two of the most frustrating and complex young ladies on the planet (at least to me) I still love them and will protect them, even when they act like idiots..and cause excessive grief and stresses for me. I'm used to it, well versed, prepared, and in all honesty it's just another day to me.

(sigh)....

Let the games begin. :D

[Enduronman]

Trench:
1. Got my youngest up for her first "therapy" session that I arranged to be away from the detention center. She wasn't happy. Very angry in fact.
2. Got her in the car and she says she's not doing this shit.
3. I said oh yesssss you are, or I will take you right back out to that shithole center and you can talk to them each time so stfu.
4. Got her inside to meet the therapist. My daughter say I don't wanna be here, I'm ready to leave now...
5. Ok, you leave now and you return to the center to stare at brick walls, in a shitty plastic chair and listen to idiots yelling or you sit here in these leather chairs with a giant fishtank and talk!...
6. Well, I'll just run away to KY then. No, because you caused this with yer friggin joint and they'll find you and force you to the center...
7. The therapist asked me to leave...I was ready to remove my daughters larynx with my hand.
8. Then she leaves, he asked me inside. Told me that "I come across extremely strong and overly powerful to her"...No shit?
9. Why wouldn't I, she was kicking my dash for this whole 4 block drive....I wanted to open the door and push her out.
10. What's really funny about this whole story? I did the same thing at 17...tee hee. It IS the only thing that "saves" her.

Do you think she'll miss me when I'm gone? LMAO!!....NO!!! bahaahaa!!!

Waiting for the NEXT eruption now..should be quite fun!

E-Man. :)

[Enduronman]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YGL3amPmyc

[Enduronman]

MRI results.
Cervical spondylosis. Bulging, herniated, protruding, disc, top to bottom, with narrow nerve sheaths..causes me to short circuit and look like I have cerebral palsy or MS...YAY!!!
Now, at least I know..and so do those dumbasses in the SSA here in America too.
Referal to a Neurosurgeon. Bullshit! That is the worst spot to attempt to operate on. I could be a veggie when they screw it up. Even if they did turn me into a total dumbass, I would still rise up outta my wheelchair and stomp their ass into the ground.
Now I can get these 6 other joints scanned and shove the photos up the Social Security Systems bung hole....
Sounds festive!!!
Merry Christmas f**kers!

E-Man...:D

[mykids12]

Do you get like electrical type pains shooting through your body? Is that what you meant by causing you to misfire?

[mykids12]

Lmao not misfire, short circuit. Like your ending btw lmao

[Enduronman]

No, it's more like robotic. My arms, legs, torso, gets all twisted and contorted and I'm not doing it. My pereferal and central nervous system nerves are crossing and shorting out...it's weird!!! DERRRR!!! LOL!!

[Enduronman]

It's like when people have seizures...they're not in control.

[Enduronman]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTy_gLF8zR0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_arMsfGw3-o

There..I found something good.....BAHA HA!

[artaud]

Afternoon Enduronman. I tried to send a message, but your inbox must be full. If you are interested, an unusual thread under the section on Medication was started on "animal rights". I'd be interested in your views, one way or t'other. I've posted mine. If past experience serves me correct, though my message was meant to be non confrontational and represent IMHO, I may be bludgeoned worse then a baby seal at harvest time.

I value your detailed and "to the point" posts, as I am sure many do.

[Enduronman]

Yeah Bro I saw that, and cleaned out my inbox too. I don't think that anyone had confrontation on their minds but it was just a misunderstanding. Just like medications, good, bad, risk, probability, this, that , the other..Each one affects each of us, differently. No magic pill persay. Going to make me some tea (no I'm American) then I'll check out that post. Thank you Artaud!..

[Enduronman]

So far, so good..but, this world isn't awake yet.
Really looking forward to an additional 6" of snow though! YAY!!...(so much for dreaming of a white Christmas)..
At least I'm not in Buffalo, NY...
On a brighter note, this auto-immune disease isn't attacking me today, a repreive, weird....but OK!
And another good note, my grandson stayed over last night. He's gettin to be a big boy. 3 yrs old. Awnry too! (wonder where that came from?)

Have a great day!!

E-Man :)

[Lee Grant Irons]

Eman,

You should look into low dose naltrexone (LDN). I take it. It knocked my thyroid automimmune levels from over 16,000 down to just over 1000. It has been clinically demonstrated by the CLeveland Clinic to put Crohns into remission.

www,lowdosenaltrexone.org

[Enduronman]

Thanks Lee!

I have never heard of that but I will see a Rheumy on the 27th. Maybe he has some more ideas than what I have now. I can't take (methotrexate) because it caused serious complications with my sis, so the Doc said no to that. Plus, our disease is genetic. Lucky us!!! Maybe about 3000 cases world wide, but I can only track down about 1100.

[Lee Grant Irons]

Low dose naltrexone is being used to strengthen good immunity and reduce autoimmunity. It is an off label use of the naltrexone medication that is used to treat heroin and alcohol addiction. You have to get through a compounding pharmacy. It has an expired patent, so no pharmaceutical reps advertise it. Thus, many doctors probably have not heard of this use of naltrexone in low doses. I get it through my primary care doctor, because, frankly, I have found rheumatologists, endocrinologists, and even immunologists completely useless when it comes to autoimmune diseases, and completely unwilling to try something new when everything else fails. In my experience, rheumies would just rather deal with arthritis, endos with diabetes, and immunos with allergy/asthma, because that's what the majority of the population need and so that's their source of income. No one that I have found really is geared toward treating autoimmunity, whether it be the joints, the hormone system, the nervous system, and every other possible part of the body.

[Enduronman]

Yes, I can see you are well versed in this complex auto-immune systems..that's rare. Thanks Lee and I will ask the Doc what she thinks too.. :)

[Enduronman]

hmmm...Something good maybe.
1. My car broke this am. 5 degrees out. Old car break alot. I waited till it warmed up to 21 deg. I fixed it. Saved $$$$'s....That's good.
2. My youngest daughter got another HS credit. 7 more to go, then all done. She schools from here online, goes into school for testing. (PTSD, GAD, SAD, Panic, ADD/ADHD). Imagine that?....She gets her own classroom, computer when there, and is left alone after directions are given. I wish I had that when I was a teen. I wouldv'e gotten a Diploma. That's her IEP. I drew it up for her, and got it approved by the State.
3. My grandson was a blast! There's dental floss going from the 2nd floor into a boot on the first floor. But, at least he had fun. I can't catch him though, too fast at 3!
4. Since I am doing so well on (Abilify) our Doc is going to try it on my daughter too. I got it today. She also wishes to strangle anyone that crosses the line, that only she can see. Like me..weird.
5. Getting ready for 6 to 8" of snow now, but not real sure what I need to get ready. Maybe firewood! Yeah, that's it.
6. Got approved for physical therapy, so maybe some day, I will again be able to do what I miss doing. Excercising. Yeaaarrrssss from now i'm sure.

Have a great Friday.

Enduro-Dork. :)

[JustAnotherMe]

Because I can't send PM's yet..

Hey bud,

I'm pretty new here and still finding my feet but your name keeps cropping up in the threads that I read. You always seem to be there for people with honest simple advise and I can tell that you're a really decent bloke. I just wanted to say thanks, it's people like you who make a huge different to the internet vagrants like me who wander from site to site.

I can tell from the threads i've seen from you that life hasn't been easy on on you but that just makes your helpful attitude all the more special.

I'm trying to make an effort to thank the people I come across in my life who have helped, from the small to the massive, because it's so easy to take all that shit for granted. So even though I don't know you, I just wanted to say thanks.

Take care.

[Enduronman]

Very very kind of you friend, those words mean alot. I appreciate that more than I can even express in words bruh.. I've read some of yours too, and am also equally as impressed with your choice of words and simplistic approaches and suggestions too. It would be a blessing and a pleasure for you to assist us as you have, there's a depth of feeling there and I suspect that you've also lived much the same as I...

That which doesn't kill us only makes us stronger, and of course, so they say, we won't be faced with any challenges that of which we ourselves can not somehow overcome...this is the only place that brings me peace.

Thank You JAM..

E-Man :)

[Enduronman]

Well then, just won $25 on a lotto ticket..but, that's weird because I never win!!
Omg..ok, what's going to happen now a car slide off the road and come through my living room!!!!...
waiting, waiting, waiting.....tic toc :)

[Enduronman]

Well Happy Saturday to you.
It was quiet, for 8 minutes. Until, my oldest drug addict daughter arrived to dispense her drama and stories upon thee..LMAO!
I now have a name, which lead me to four other names..I like to eradicate thugs from my streets and may soon be coming to a town near you. Look for my Tour Bus.
It'll say "Street Sweeper" on the side of it, in giant letters and it'll be shaped like a vehicle from the movie Mad Max.
I will protect my young (even though they act as fools) like Denzel protected The Book of Eli.
What names you ask?..What's the BFD?
A drug ring.....I'm takin em down.
Why? Because I believe in maturity when we reach adulthood, if they fail and continue to create havoc and misery, then I see fit to force reform.
If they're a productive member of our society, they're safe. If they're still a juvenile, they're safe. An adult menace to our society, Invasion of a Body Snatcher.
They won't even know what happened, how, or who, and will spend a lifetime wondering...they'll never know.
Fear of the unknown, will infect them from the insides for a lifetime.
That makes me all warm and fuzzy inside to be so complimentary...HAHA!
Not only will it keep my kids safe, it may just keep your kids safe too..even though you're not my neighbor.
With the help of two informants, that don't even know they're informing,..my (2) daughters.
Interesting. Intriguing. Involved. Intense.
Ah, just another day in the life of a Watcher...
Spooky, creepy, erie, disturbing...but I love it.
My anxiety?
Addicted to Chaos..it soothes and comforts me.
Holy s**t where's my anti-psychotic meds MAAA!!! The meatloaf!! The meds!!! F**K!!!!....

Have a great weekend sisters and brothers, mine just even better than a lotto win.

Enduring Man. :D

[Lee Grant Irons]

That was almost poetry Eman! You should write poetry. I would read it.

[Enduronman]

LMAO!! Whenever I get into that weird "zone" words seem foreign to me! But I'm typing the friggin things, tappin these keys...it's like a different dimension. I guess if I can share anything about who I am it is that I'm multi-dimensional with multiple personalities, as if that may be obvious bruh? It's hard to conceal..
My Doctor's (a bunch of them) say I should write a book. I am still not sure about catagory however because it would appear as Sci-Fi, Drama, Poetry, Novel, History, Fictional, Non-fictional, Humor, How to, Ethics and Moral philosophy, Crime and mystery,,... so they say I have to narrow it down to (1)....Idiots! They seem to have great difficulty in "expanding their minds". They're disparaging at times...Hilarious!!
How hard is that going to be??!!!!!.....

Hope's for our success today Lee!

[jessed03]

Are you going all in with that $25 on the next draw? You know what they say about hot streaks ;)

[Enduronman]

Funny you should say that Jesse,....because
I just got a check in the mail for $1023.00 BECAUSE I OVERPAID MY DOCTOR!!! lmao!!!
Weird shit happening over here in the E-Man household bruh....
Everything is starting to come together, because I have fought the best fight for 18 fuggin months!! (or 46 years but who's counting)...YAY!!!
I will have to continue though friend, life would be dull and drab....:)

[jessed03]

$1048 all in on the next draw it is man ;)

Your lucks turning! Go with the hot hand!!

[Enduronman]

BHAAAHA!!! OK!!! $1000 worth of lotto tickets it is then!!! Goin with your advice bruh,...I sure hope yer right! YEAH! :D

[Enduronman]

I instead purchased $11 worth of lotto tickets. Fail. Oh well!!
My youngest daughter called me too, on my cell phone, yet no one is allowed to have that number. Not sure how she got it...hmmm
Wanted me to rent her and her friends a hotel room to party in. NO WAY! Not in my damn name..Oh but why Da DA?....
I tried to explain: Because when I was your age, we trashed them and whoever's name they were in, got the bill for damages!!! BYE!!!
Then I turned my phone off...ahhhh peace and tranquility. (merely temporary i'm sure).
Try to keep moving forward friends....:)

[Lee Grant Irons]

The same reason why I like to meet the guys my girls date. "Because I was a teenage boy once." Ha!

[Enduronman]

Click over and read what I did today that was "positive"....Those are the boys that (supposedly) my youngest daughter has been seen with...
Everyone of the boys that either of my daughters ever brought in here, reminded me of me..Yet, I know that they aren't capable of "maintaining" just by looking at them.
Just like their mother didn't want me to meet her parents, because I had tattoos...whooooaaa.. LOL!!!

[jessed03]

Enduronman, I have a lot of experience in treating young, blonde, rebellious, way wood daughters. For my method to work, I need you to provide me with the following:

- A sharp 'Frank Sinatra' style suit
- The names of these two naughty girls who need sorting
- An address I can pick them up at
- A few bottles of Jack Daniels
- A hotel suite with a King sized bed, and 3 tickets to Vegas

I look forward to your reply, and arranging a way to get these things to me!

[Enduronman]

BHAAAHA!!
1. They are both blonde, rebellious, wayword, and as our Doc told me, "They're like lion cubs"....They will eat you alive, without ketchup!
2. If you played a Frank Sinatra cd aloud, they would beat you to within an inch of your life...they're more Drake.
3. They are CC, and Lil C.. since I am Chris.
4. They are into "hypnotic" whatever the hell that is..My youngest, asked me for some money to get some last night....I said "No you ^^^&$@#88 #%%%#*(99 %^$&^"
5. Lil C said only if the bed is on top the roof of the Bellagio and you aren't afraid to steal a police car and a tiger...LMAO!!!

Needless to say, you'd be missing more than a lateral incisor when they are finished with you! (Remember, they are Viking offspring brotha Jesse)....
If you recall, my 17 yr old came in here last weekend and asked me if I had a knife she could borrow? Whut?? Hell no!!
She said well what about this wooden club? Ok, yeah take that because at least you won't end up in prison...Ok Dad thanks!...grrrrrr....
She was going to hunt down (3) 18 to 20 yr old MEN to beat the shit out of them!!! And, she can.. so proud :/
PM me your mailing address and I'll pack you up some good ole American supplements (as long as your customs don't keep it for themselves) for Christmas!!

Have a good day bruh, I'm going Christmas shopping in a few before the crowds arrive and take the 3 mini computers I want!

E-Man..:)

[jessed03]

Haha

What is it with your young American girls these days and their hip hop lifestyles. *Begins to light a pipe and smoke it* Back was I was wee nipper, girls used to like a man with a job, who held doors open and respected their parents.

Now it's all about the twerking, and derking, and whatever the heck else these young people like to erk on.

*Takes slippers off, and reclines back into the chair* Ahh that feels good.... And don't get me started on their iPhones, and the sexbox games all the kids seem to play on. What happened to calling a person? Back in my day, it was a pleasure to be called from downstairs by mum, telling me I had a phone call.

*Offers Lil C a hard mint sucking candy, and sucks on one myself* But the world she's always a changing I suppose. Good on them i say. I suppose I'm just a grey haired old coot. Ah to be young! I should have known I was getting old when all the noises I used to make during sex, I now make getting out of bed.

[Enduronman]

LMAO!!!

You twerk and derk on the threshold of philosopical theology! What are you like 25 yrs old??!!!! BAAAHAA!!!

Serious, I'll send ya a pro-hormone bottle as long as it's legal over there? Gimme an address d**k!!! Don't worry, I didn't take your advice and buy $1000 worth of lotto, only $11....so I'm chill. HAAAHA!!! (I lost). Imagine that?

Oh yeah, Lil C called me lastnight to "rent her a hotel room" in my name...f**k that idea C!!! ahhh cmon Dad..... No. :)

[jessed03]

Like 24 and a half, yeah :p... Fun playing old man though. I'm practicing with birds on my lawn for when old age arrives 'Hey, hey you... Get the hell of my front lawn'

At least you're up on the week! Won $25, lost $11... Carry that on for the next couple years, and it's all gooood!

P.s. Alright bro, I'll PM you my address. Appreciate that! Gonna be awesome to try some of your Yankee Doodle Americano supplements!!!

[Enduronman]

Ok! I will send some stuff over the giant pond.. LOL!

[jessed03]

Do you get DHEA instead over there? I wanna try that shit, but can't get it here, it's sold out where I look. It sounds good though.

[Enduronman]

Hell yes, I am going to get you some now. Plus I've already got (3) other supps unopened bottled and ready to box up now. (kickin amino acids for those of us that have brain chemical imbalances/assisted by amino acid imbalances)....so, we'll balance them out. :)

[Enduronman]

You got any fam over there that has joint pains???..I can send a supp for that too..:D

[jessed03]

My dad's 70, he doesn't take much for joint stuff, other than seven seas though!

[Enduronman]

Sunday...
1. Went out to get 3 tablets (computer of course) for the kids.
2. There is NEVER anybody there, until......this morning.
3. They are releasing the Xbox ONE...OMGAWWDDDDD!!! YAY!!! F**K!!!!
4. There's 40 people in front of me, and I don't even want a f**kin Xbox 1....
5. I go to the service desk to see if they can just order them, NOOOOO>>>>>their f**kin kiosk is down...
6. AND.....I left my new f**kin Carhart hat on their damn counter!!!!....
7. BUT, I did get all this shit for that crazy ass Londen'er up yonder..I'll have that limp biscuit muther f**ker in tip top shape in no time...

Yippee....:)

Where's my cocaine at.

E-Man. :)

[jessed03]

Shit, I got all excited when you said you got gifts for a Londoner, but then I read the part about him being 'crazy' and thought, damn man, can't be me ;) ;)

I haven't done an ounce of Christmas shopping yet bro. I can't face it. I literally can't face it. To get to my mall I have to walk through the park. The park is so serene and peaceful, I just think nah, I'm not feeling that mall, and go get a milkshake instead!

I don't even know what it's like out there right now! I imagine it to be like some zombie apocalypse with things tipped everywhere and people knocking each other over!!

Did you get your hat back? This is karma bro... It's read your file and is sending you a memo 'Dear Eman, we've noticed an error. we've sent you too much luck by mistake. Please note we'll be coming to collect it as of today.' :D!

[Enduronman]

Lmao!!!

I called the store, I left it on the counter and they have it for me. How nice, a bag with a hat in it marked Chris...gawd
I also just went over to another store that opened at 9 and I had no idea what to expect. I pulled in, not (1) other car.
Got inside and two people greeted me. Had the whole store to myself!...weird....
Told them what I wanted, right here sir (sir, maybe they saw the two 9's lol!)...Yes, I want all 3 of those! Last ones, cost me $2 more than the other store but f**k that shit I'm not standing in some damn line for an hour for $6. Kiss my American a**!....
Pretty awesome little machines too, high ratings, affordable (for a disabled guy) and the kids will love it! (22,17,15,..not really kids but still)...
I can not however, wrap worth a shit...I admit my faults.
We're gonna get you outta that damn house by Christmas too..not sure how long it'll take to send this over.
And considering, I'll be writing out yer f**kin address for an hour and forty six minutes, it may take abit longer.
Oh, they asked what's in the box? I told them it's a brick of Columbian Bam Bam, or Lucky Charms, whichever is more legal to send to Scotland Yard...:D

[Lee Grant Irons]

I can take the crowds. What I hate is the traffic. Especially when you get someone in front of you who has to make a left turn (American roads), but does not if there are any cars in sight in either direction. Grrrrrrrrrr!!!!

[Enduronman]

I still hate traffic myself, always will probably except if we're moving. Stuck, stopped, sitting,..holy s**t!!! I love the interstate driving here though, 90 mph man!!! Hey Jesse what's the speed limits over there if there are any???...And what kind of cars does everyone drive??...jus curious... :)

[Lee Grant Irons]

I love the interstate driving here though, 90 mph man!!! Hey Jesse what's the speed limits over there if there are any???...And what kind of cars does everyone drive??...jus curious... :)

Interstates where I live are STUPID. I live on what is called the Virginia peninsula. There are six ways to get off of this peninsula, and only two of them take you inland toward the interstate 95, which is the main artery for driving up and down the east coast. One of these two routes is an interstate and the other is a state highway with towns and stoplights. The interstate is only four lanes (two lanes in either direction). And where I live is the ONLY deep water port on the east coast, so all of the super-size sea-land container ships that service the eastern USA come into our port, and tha vast majority of that truck traffic uses that one four lane interstate, along with all of the tourist traffic for Virginia Beach (coastal resort town) and Williamsburg, Yorktown, and Jamestown (all historical settlements). Then. on top of all of this, 80% of the people on the interstate drive in the LEFT LANE! There are signs that say "Left Lane For Passing Only." We even have a law that says that you are supposed to move over to the right lane if someone moving faster than you comes up on your tail and flashes their lights, regardless of what the speed limit is. But we get these people who take it upon themselves to be the "traffic moderator" and sit in the left lane pacing the cars in the right lane next to them and back all of the traffic up.

So, no, I don't like interstate driving around here. LOL

[jessed03]

Traffic here is so annoying. The roads are too small, and cars can park and travel and park on both sides. Often to pass a car, you have to reverse into a gap, let it pass, come out, and do it again a few metres up the road. *Facepalm*

Speed limit here is 70mph. You can get away with 80 usually.

... It all depends on how fast the horse can pull your carriage ;)

[Enduronman]

Not very interesting or appealing..
My Dad brought me over a cane to help get me up and out of chairs and such.
Feeling a little bit, indifferent at the moment but it'll wear off.
It was his Grandmothers, Mothers, his, now..hmmm....weird.
Think I'll personalize it with some chrome and pinstripes, or maybe just restain it cherry. yeah..
Strange feeling regardless, part of life, and don't say "yer gettin old E-Man!"....grrrr...

:)

[jessed03]

File the bottom into a sharp point, and use it to prod the terrible two :D

[Enduronman]

I did have the thought of turning it into one of those cane/rifles as was common in England in the 1800's...that would be my best defense against those two, especially the youngest...geeze!

[Enduronman]

hmmm...
1. One of our other members really opened my eyes, and yes it was his intention to do so. Therapeutic.
2. Getting real tired of this morning congestion and sneezing, but that's to be expected when it appears that I'm living in Antarctica outside.
3. My oldest daughter (addict) did NOT make it to the eye Dr appointment that I had made for her...grrrr...she makes things difficult. Shit!!!!
4. My youngest daughter WILL be woken up at exactly 10am to begin online schooling. I have set 2 GIANT Cerwin Vega speakers at her door and am ready to push this button...just trying to figure out the most annoying tune for her. And, I have taped 6 tacks to the snooze button on her alarm clock, she will GTFU!
5. Gotta get up to the post office to see how much a shipment of some cocaine, weed, and meth is going to cost me, to London.
6. Had to give myself a shot in the stomach again lastnight, I hope that doesn't continue to seem so "alien" to me to do that..
7. Hoping for a great week for myself, and all of you too!
8. Got all my Christmas shopping done in 5 mins..
9. Looking forward to Christmas and to also get to see my 15 yr old, 6' tall son...geeze. WTF do they feed him???
10. hmmm...Yes, make some calls today to sell some more of these damn tools. I want more money!

Make this day a great day!

E-Man...:)

[jessed03]

When I read this thread, it reminds me of an agony aunt column. Only all the problems are from the same person. And the agony aunt has probably long since shot herself due to the stress of having to solve them.

Very amusing though, in a 'you either laugh or kill somebody' kind of way!

Much credit to you for finding the humour!

[Enduronman]

Brotha Jesse,

If you'd learned anything about this dumbass E-Bert-Man, it is that I MUST find humor in disasters, it's the only thing that prevents the 'laugh or kill' syndrome that I suffer from...LMAO!!
I did a couple of good things today already (as brother Dave suggested, small, from the hip, goals) and no they didn't involve a 9mm.
I let some people cut in front of me at the grocery, they were holding their shit, I had a cart...then, the poinsettia rang up wrong!! FLOWER CHECK ISLE 2!!! grrrr.....
But, I maintained even though I was 1 second away from saying HERE'S THE F**KIN $1!!!!....I kept my cool..breathe...
Then while at said store, I bought 2 giant half hams for gifts, to give to needy people. I know a guy that has 5 kids and 4 grandkids living in his fuggin house! (I admire his stamina, will power, patience, and what the f**k ever else it would take to deal with that..the grandbaby's are all in diapers)...and he bust his ass working everyday for them.
His kids, IDK...not all that "ambitious" as far as I can tell except one is a workaholic...she's 20.
I took them one over, his wife must have thought I was in law enforcement or something because she wouldn't answer the door until he answered her call...(maybe it's the dark Matrix sunglasses, black hat, black wool coat, black leather gloves, robotic like walk because my knees and ankles are bad and I can't turn my head well..maybe she thought I was a Cyborg..(BAAHA!) and I don't look all that fluffy and friendly although I am)...
Just trying to figure out what to do with this other one, it makes me "feel" good inside..hope I don't get punished for my good deeds.
The post office was jammed with a line going out the damn doors, so I drove by, honked, and yelled Merry Christmas A**holes!!! LOL!! (I will go back after noon)....
I still CAN NOT stand in a line, twitling my w**nus..or thumbs. whichever seems more appropriate at thus time.

Very amusing bruh?..

Yes, I'd say!!!!....laughing while in hell, doesn't get anymore difficult than that!!! HAAAHA!!

Oh the agony!!!...WAAAHH WAAH!!! help...

Column continuation will follow shortly.

Lil C is in my bottle of caffeine pills,..I SEE YOU!!! GTFO OF THEM!!!

xoxo...:D

[Enduronman]

Almost forgot,

When I get to the post office, I am going to say aloud that "I would like to see how much this cost to send into the remote areas of Uzbekistan, but I don't have an address only coordinates lat & lon, and a name of Mr. DoughBoy. It must be air dropped. How much?"....

I'm being serious...

[jessed03]

Laugh out loud at the above posts. Laugh out fucking loud.

A unique and inspiring philosophy bro. Laugh out loud funny. The tragedy and comedy in life summed up in a way only the big E can.

I can't remember who said 'God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh'... Doesn't matter who it was, I just have a feeling somewhere up in those clouds the big guys looking down saying 'Finally!!! A guy who gets my humour!!!'

I'm also digging the adventures of lil C... Seriously! It's one of those things I can enjoy, what with her being someone else's responsibility, and me living an ocean away in safety :D

[Enduronman]

HAAHA!!!

I love making others laugh, at my expense, because it's "fulfilling"...:)

PS: This dang box full of stuff is still sitting here! I went AGAIN to the post office, and of course, there are 3000 people standing in line!!

Shit I wonder if maybe Santa Claus is in there now, catering to adults now!!!.. OMG!

I may have to ship it after Christmas...because (let's use this analogy) me standing in a long line, or standing period, would be like setting a double cheeseburger on a dog's nose, and telling him to wait..wait...wait..for an hour!!!.. BAHAAHA!!!

Yes, Lil C is truly an unweilding adventure all her own...eessshhhh....Not real enthused about this whole "clone" shit, TBH...:)

[Enduronman]

Just for you Jesse...
Just went to the station to get some more lotto tickets..
There are two checkouts in there, I'm at one, and a complete idiot is at another..loud. boisterous..
I get what I wanted, and then I hear the brain dead dipshit on the other checkout say "well, gawd damn I gotta show ID to use a debit card and I got the pin number?"
The attendant says "Yes, our managers have asked us to start doing this to be sure you're the owner of the card"...
Then, wickdeed says "Well, shit this is my card see the name and look at ma shirt it say's Randy Streeval hell I didn't steal the card and shirt too!"...
The attendant that was standing in front of me started getting nervous as the guy kept getting more agitated,..I reached down and and tapped on my clip so he could see it.
I told him, it'll be ok just ignore him..He then said that he liked my coat, small talk while dumbass was freakin out with no ID, no license, and no personality...
He finally walked out, and then I followed and the cashier gave me the nod like..thanks for hangin back man....
That trainwreck moron may have had 2 teeth left but if he would've gotten any worse, he'd have none to show off...or may be even missing a kneecap very quickly..
Welcome to my world! It's like a constant thrill ride!...but, I don't know nor expect any different... so I wrote a song.

Sing like Silent Night.

A** Hole..
Loud A**hole...iooo
Stupid f**king Streeval...
Go baaaccckkkk to Edinburgggg...
Tooo innn breeeddd
wiiittthhhh youurrr sisterrrrrr...
You keppptttt your teeettthhh
foorrr oneee more nighttttt....
Slackkkk jawwweedddd Moorrooonnnn
Coompplllleetttee f**cckkiinnn retarddd..
NNooowwww ggoooo ccconnttinueee yourrr fuueedd wiitthh the f**kkinng Burttonsss....
Slllleeeppp yyouu kknnuucckklleee draaggiin hheeiirrlip, that talked with a lisp.

This has been a public service announcement by Enduro the Out of Tune Singing Viking Psycho..

Thanks for reading.,

YAY!!! :)

[Enduronman]

Ok, I found something good in today.
I had to take my daughter to get a new winter coat, considering I am not buying size 9 to 11 pants, her coat was huge on her too.
We went to the shopping plaza to price them out. I refuse to buy anything other than wool.
Holy s**t, this is on sale? At 50% off???!!!!..The one SHE wanted of course, but very nice.
Ok,..Oh Hi how are you?
A friend of my daughters WORKS there and tomorrow after 630 pm, she can get it for 55% MORE off...
Hell yes!!! We will see you tomorrow then...
Saves me $71.50....
That WAS a good thing, and those kind of things had once been generally rare but seem to keep happening lately so, I'll ride it while it's here, cuz it won't stay!

Have a great night all...:)

[Lee Grant Irons]

Let's hope the coat is still there tomorrow. LOL

[Enduronman]

Oh but Lee,..I took it back to CS and asked them to hold it till tomorrow night! It WAS the only one she liked..you know she said "can't we just get it now?"....
Ummm,..NO!!! $70 more!!! LOL!
Kids....sigh.....grrrrrrr...... :)

[Enduronman]

yes, I was making this a good week thus far.
got my car fixed on Saturday (rather than waiting for the mechanics to get free).
got some food for some needy families,..
got a couple of checks out of nowhere..
then of course, I have no dash lights or tail lights TONIGHT..
ah yes, again, I will be working on a car tomorrow outside and taking the steering column apart to replace the switch..
I KNEW that something was coming, just wasn't sure what yet..maybe an hours worth of work but it just HAD to break now...YES!!!
part ordered, pick up at 9, hand them some money, and sit in the car...
"It's always going to be something"....
"When one thing breaks, two others follow"... this is third repair since Thanksgiving day.
This is the last,..for awhile. Everything seems to come in 3's, and I'm not real sure why.

Have a good night..

[Enduronman]

(sigh)
1. After a 9am panic/freak/kill attack from my daughter, we made it through the 3pm filling at the dentist office. YAY!!
2. It took (2) valium to get her in there, calm, tranquil, and believe it or not, happy after a person is drilling on her teeth for 2 hours..Excellent!
3. Went to get my car part, someone put their used on in the box and returned it..They were trying to sell me a used and probably broken part.
4. They ordered another brand new one, got it now..just too late to fix it. Oh well...
5. One more task, get my daughter her new coat at the dept store, 630...hope THAT goes well. Praying, hoping, wishing for success and ease...

So far, so good...fingers crossed! :)

[JustAnotherMe]

When it rains...

You got this mate. We're here though fow if you need it :)

[Enduronman]

YAY!!

We made it, and her friend was working there too..
She rang up the total, and then put in some employee code that dropped it $70!!
When I was done paying, I dug in my pocket to see what was left...I had $13 so I gave it to her as a tip for doing that.
I just hope that 13 is a good number for now...it can be "unlucky"....:)

[Enduronman]

Damn it...EVERYTHING for some odd reason ^^^^^^^^^^^ 13^^^^^^^^^^^ suddenly exploded. BOOM!!!! Hell yes let's get this party started!!!
Break out the fireworks and streamers!!! and some of those stupid pop bottle confetti thingys too!!
LMAO!!!....
Got a sudden call from my XXXXXXXXXXX wife and mother of my 3 children.....
OH NO WHY DID I ANSWER THE F**KING PHONE!!!!
"Did you hear about CC?") our oldest, 22, 2 kids, addict, yadd yadda bling blang..
"Uh, no..what?"...this autta be good....
"Well, I heard that she moved out of her boyfriends house (also drug addict) and moved in with another drug dealer (2005 arrests and conviction) and she is GOING TO DIE"
"Ok, Good talk..." click. I hung up. Because once that dumbass reaches the edge of The Universe and throws in the D word, I bail...because she is a complete idiot.
She has NO idea that I have friends in very, very high places and also that I ALREADY KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT WHAT SHE JUST HEARD,...7 days ago
MINUS the "Our daughter is going to die" part of course.. OMGAWWDDD!!!
Shit, I already know everything about the guy that she's now living with, background, arrests, reasons, faults, causes, case numbers,...and that he is a CI...
Then, considering this loony, inept, irrational, illogical, other parent is in my friggin town tonight to pick up The Lion Cub to go look at f**kin Christmas lights....
The Lion Cub is now freaking out and wondering how in the hell she is supposed to spend the next 2 hours in a car with a fuggin nutjob that needs much medication!!!
Because, she WILL be talking the "Your going to end up just like your sister" bullshit the entire time, and Lion Cub may just knock her mom out of said car,...
In downtown BIG CITY, and leave her there sucking her thumb and crying for her mommy!!!....SSSOOOOOOOO,...I was forced to give said Cub, another dose of meds,
to prevent her from lunging over the backseat, to quickly and wholly, apply said DEATH GRIP to the very mother that "abandoned" her and her sis just before
Thanksgiving in 2007....threw them on my porch, in a neatly decorated little basket, complete with note, that said..."Here, I can't handle them"...Goodluck A**hole!
Hmmm...Know why you can't handle them?.....
because, they're hard as iron, sharp as steel, stop for no one, including but not limited too...you.

Now, wasn't that a nice shits & giggles story to read??

It's the most, Wonderful timeeeeee of the yeeaaarrrrrrrr.....

F**k.. :D

[Lee Grant Irons]

Next time, just give 12 bucks and drop the other buck in the Salvation Army bucket. LOL

[Enduronman]

Why didn't I!!!!! I KNEW it man, when I was counting it out!!!!! DUDE!!!!

I can't stop laughing either!!...I really am "insane". :)

[Enduronman]

Oh great!!!

ANDDDD....of any State in this country, there is AN EXTREME FLOODING THREAT in INDIANA!!!!

BRING IT ON SUCKA!!! ....yay. :)

[jessed03]

When that happened, there were also 13 days until new year, in the year 2013....

Spoooooooooooky!!!

[Enduronman]

holy fuggin s**t dude...SEE!!! (sigh)....:(

[jessed03]

Also, again, the day that happened your thread was on page 13....

LOL getting freaked out yet?

[Enduronman]

Ya think?

Thanks for noticing that my OCD buddy!!!....(oh no, wtf is going to happen now...a 747 crash through my house?)

:)

[jessed03]

Be afraid bruh... Be real afraid... This 13 sh*ts getting serious!

http://i.imgur.com/EBxwWeNh.jpg

[Enduronman]

Oh GOD!!! Cmon man!!! ....That's NOT awesome!!! :(

[jessed03]

The 13 made me do it bro :-(

[Enduronman]

Hopefully, the curse has been broken....YAY!!...because.......>>>>>>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mk74WprmZxY

[jessed03]

Bro I'm dying of tiredness here, and you're not even here entertaining me... Whaaa thaaaa faaaaa

I know you have things to do, but you can do both of these things. Don't believe you can?

It's time I told you a story... Bout the little engine that could!

[Enduronman]

chugga chugga....LMAO!!! TOOT TOOT! :) BOOM!

[Enduronman]

YAY!!!
1. Dr's visit for my little Lion Cub well great! (rare).....
2. They doubled her dose of Xanax XR....YAY!!!
3. Nothing has exploded yet today, Lion is happy, I am doing great again (thanks Art and Dorrie), and hopefully it stays this way too...

Have a great day all!!...:)

[Enduronman]

Please help!!! Advice needed!!! (Just a rant) section.....I'm fuggin baffled. :)

[jessed03]

If you like seeing her naked, usually you've gotta play along with the 'oh that's soooo awful' and the '*gasp* it did WHAT?!!!s'

Lot of women like their drama bro.

Drama = Xbox for them.

I think you played it well. Calm.

[jessed03]

What's gonna be on the table for Xmas dinner this year in the enduron household?

Wondering what gets onto a vegan inflammation free Xmas plate

[jhunter89]

You live in Indiana now? I love 13 it's ma burfffday :)

[jessed03]

Haha yes! It's back!

The 13 is back stalking you!! Curse broken my ass ;)

[Enduronman]

oh shit where did this 13 come from now!!!...

I'm going to have a glass of ice water, toothpick, napkin, pack of ketchup and a straw!!!....mmmmmm... :D

[Enduronman]

Oh btw, got the car fixed...then the ignition switch cylinder decided to stop turning..
Tomorrow, new ignition switch..excellent!...easy though, its already torn apart!!!...YAY!!!

where's my meds at....:)

[Enduronman]

Ok Sunday, but no sun just a flood...
I went and bought the hungry military Vet and his wife some Christmas dinner..A giant ham and some other good things too.
Made me feel good, even though I have to work on this damn car again today...eesshhh
AND. he gave me the penny, to keep the curse of Eman lifted for at least (1) day...YAY!!

Enjoy this day friends....:)

[trinidiva]

Ok Sunday, but no sun just a flood...
I went and bought the hungry military Vet and his wife some Christmas dinner..A giant ham and some other good things too.
Made me feel good, even though I have to work on this damn car again today...eesshhh
AND. he gave me the penny, to keep the curse of Eman lifted for at least (1) day...YAY!!

Enjoy this day friends....:)

That was really good of you! I would like to find a family to donate to as well. My husband just participated in a coat drive and distribution and was able to give a number of kids winter coats.....it was done through his job but I think next year I will go and volunteer too.

[Enduronman]

He just stands on the side of the road with his wife sitting in the background. I did also donate all of the old clothes around this house to a place called Human Services. They had empty shelves, then they were all full! I even washed it all too...I like the direct or semi-direct contact donating much better. I know that alot of families can use those clothes. and that fella (Brad) and his wife are at least going to have a giant ham dinner! Merry Christmas Lisa! :)

[jessed03]

I went and bought the hungry military Vet and his wife some Christmas dinner..A giant ham and some other good things too.


He's put a great big smile on somebodies face - Wizzard (Wish it could be Christmas everyday)

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ZoxQ4Ul_DME

[Enduronman]

He's put a great big smile on somebodies face...the #13

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9PrntnaSho

[Enduronman]

Jesse the Forum studdard, has put a great big smile on somebodies face...The Janey!


oooo nooooo....LMAO!!

[Ponder]

Like a good many others in here, you have a good heart E_man. Not that I know anything, but it is warming to read some of the things you write. Cheers bruh ;)

[Lee Grant Irons]

Glad you found someone to help!

[Enduronman]

Thank you for that comment Dave, it means alot to read about this heart being kind..(it wasn't 28 years ago. and is at times touch and go now but I'm working on it bro, daily..)...

Yes Lee, it's amazing the feelings that one gets while helping out another person in need..it does make the heart feel "warm"..

Eman..:)

[trinidiva]

He just stands on the side of the road with his wife sitting in the background. I did also donate all of the old clothes around this house to a place called Human Services. They had empty shelves, then they were all full! I even washed it all too...I like the direct or semi-direct contact donating much better. I know that alot of families can use those clothes. and that fella (Brad) and his wife are at least going to have a giant ham dinner! Merry Christmas Lisa! :)

Merry Christmas to you too Chris!!!!

[Enduronman]

GRRRR...grr
1. So, why do X's have to be such a**holes? I'm not..I don't do things to her out of "spite".
2. So, she has my Grandson for a few days 120 miles away and brings him back home today. Drives right by my damn house, and doesn't let my Son come in and say hey?
3. So, she just drops the baby off, and takes back off on her 120 mile trip..and I didn't get to give my Son his fuggin Christmas gifts...!
4. So, she is a ______ and a ____ ____ and also a ______ ____ ___ ________!!!!!! geeze....
5. I will be sooooo happy when my Son is not only 6' tall, but also Man enough to say **** *** Mom I'm going to see my Dad...later.

(sigh)....keep calm.

Have a wonderfully luxurious night all!

TAH!...:|

[Enduronman]

I appreciate your compassion Frankie...it'll be ok because it has to be. :)

[Enduronman]

ABHAAHA!..
1. My Son called and said that his Mothers bf is going to bring him up here for Christmas day, he has chosen to "overule" her decision to be an a**hole..
2. Gotta go get another shot this morning, so, I'm going to the giant retail store to get giant chocolate bars for my Dr. and all of her staff members for Christmas..they keep this machine running right, a huge chore, task, and challenge..LOL!
3. Looking forward to seeing some positive posted threads on here today too..I know there's success stories out there...:)

It's nearly here!!!

E-Man..

[Enduronman]

Monday...
1. 20 giant chocolate bars delivered to my Doc's office..all the nursies were happy, even the one that stuck a needle in my a** too..
2. When I got out of the examining room, the ENTIRE office smelled like Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory!!! ABHAAAAHA!!!
3. ANNDDDD...My oldest daughter was just here and she is now detoxing slowly with the help of her new bf..She was already a completely different CC!..She could talk without slobbering!!!...YES!!

Have an awesome day, fingers crossed here!

E. :)

[Enduronman]

(((***I am happy because I walked out of my safe zone a bit today. Small progress but progress it is!***)))

YOU made us all happy too!!! Friggin awesome!!! Already stepping out of "The Zone" a few days later!!! OMGEEEEEE!!

Baby steps Frankie, you got this friend....

E. :)

[jessed03]

Hi
E, I'm so pleased for you, those are some good news posts. Brilliant.

I am happy because I walked out of my safe zone a bit today. Small progress but progress it is!

My mood was a bit iffy a little while ago but just come online and picked up on some of the good news on here. Feel up again.

A victory indeed!

Way to go Frankie!

[Enduronman]

(Not necessary to read, just getting this off my mind....compiled jumbled garble)

hmmm...Indifferent, again. Abit, baffled..
My Son had called last night to make me aware that his Mothers, BF, was going to bring him up for Christmas Day and overrule his GF's wishes..(he caved, crumbled)
Then, I get a call from said, other parent, and she says "You can't even change the time or make amends for your Son to see him?" What? Amends for what????
I told my Son that we leave here at 11:30am sharp, every Christmas Day to visit family. We aren't late. Plus, my Father rents different cars each year too, and picks us up.
Then I hear, "You asked us to bring him up there and you're not even going to be there?".."Is your family more important than your own Son?".....WTF are you talkin about?
I can't call anyone, the day before, and say "hey, nevermind, we have to wait for whenever my Son gets here"..His Mother has her "own" time, unlike the rest of the world.
By this time, I'm ready to put this phone into the fireplace..and, I once again, have NO CLUE what she is even talking about..So, I call my Son....
What's this all about? Why is she pissed off at me now?...I don't even know what she's talking about!!!!.....You were "supposed" to come up here!!!!
"Well, my Sister is planning all of this Dad, she didn't tell you?"....um NOOOOOOOO!!!! ...No, she didn't. So, then I call the X irrational, illogical, dumba** myself...
"I did not ask you to bring him up here, I have no idea wtf is going on, or why I'm getting bit**ed at for something I don't even have knowledge of happening!!"...
Oh, a 17 yr old is "making all these arrangements" without, checkin in with the Father...maybe that's why I don't have a fuggin clue....
So now, I leave to go to Grandmother's house at the same time, and leave my 17 yr old Lion Cub here to "wait" on her Brother..which won't arrive until, such a time....
That NO ONE EVEN KNOWS....not (1) single person....to arrive at Grandma's to hear "Where's Lil C at?"....
IDK,...I don't have a clue, I don't even know what just happened...but, she's at home waiting on her Brother today...until he gets there. Sometime.
Oh, I really wanted to see her it's been a year I think?..... (sigh)...... whatever. I should've stopped answering the phone 24 hours earlier, than planned....
Live and learn....every single day.
Tiring. Exhausting. Frustrating....

E....

[Enduronman]

Hopefully, today is less eventful...
I'm showering, then heading out for the Holiday tradition of mine. Buying whatever is left, you may get a new softball!
It's like 14 deg with a windchill of 2...Ahh, just like home. I just may, put on long pants. IDK yet...
Wishing everyone a spectacular day, filled with family, friends, and fun gatherings...
Oh, and hoping to see all of my great friends here today too...

Best wishes for this Holiday...

Chris :)

[Lee Grant Irons]

Merry Christmas, Chris!

[Enduronman]

Merry Christmas Lee!!
:)

[jessed03]

**Not planned I swear!!!**

I have 13 friends on my friend list....

[Enduronman]

Well, find some more because I'm doing great bruh!! Cmon man!! :)

[Enduronman]

(sigh)...and some yelling too. but I'm ok...
My daughter began talking s**t about her sis on the way to the party, I told her not to talk about her like that nor ever say those words aloud for this world to hear.
Keep those thoughts to yourself.."I don't give a **** what happens to my sister"...were her words.
I told her to shut the **** up now, and take that all back, and ask for forgiveness and rephrase your words...
OR, something is going to happen, you just don't know what or when but very soon, something that will impact you..
She just called, car had started fine 3 times since she left 1 hour ago...
It is now stranded at a gas station, with a bad starter, on Christmas Eve..and I refuse to work on that car on Christmas day..
Now, there's the bad, that IS what happens, of course again I will have added fees and expenses to fix what This Universe didn't want to hear her say aloud..
That is why this happened, on this night, on this Eve of Christmas....
She has taken my other car now, I am turning my phones off...

[Enduronman]

ON a bright note, I just found a new starter for it laying on my front porch from when I stripped another car that I junked out...It was new when I took it out.
That is a savings of $100.00...
But, I still have a car sittin in a gas station parking space from now till Thursday...
Shitty, hateful, thoughtless, words flung into mid air...
I knew it, just didn't know what it was going to be.
It takes about 20 mins to do it...but geeze....:(

[Lee Grant Irons]

Our kids have to suffer the consequences of their own actions, but us parents always must share some of the brunt of it. LOL

[Enduronman]

Yeah, I know..It'll be my labor, time, effort,..the day after Christmas in a parking lot.. Unreal bruh..she shouldv'e just kept her thoughts to herself. (sigh)

[Dorrie23]

Merry Christmas!!!!! You a crazy guy....but that's what makes you interesting. And likeable. Did I just say that?? sigh... Lol. You know I think you're the bomb. Hope all goes well today!!! You're a great dad for caring. We don't all get that. But geese louise..... you should see the presents my little guy has under the tree. Gonna be a hyper active...FUN day. ANd my older sons calling today, and we'll all get to talk to him. I cant wait to get him home and back on his feet. You have no idea how much I love and miss him. Uhhh...yeah you do. Have a great day. Many blessings to you, and I'll be hoping the best for you. You do the same for me. Dorrie

[Dorrie23]

Just want to wish you a Merry Christmas, and thank you for the nice response the other day. Many Blessings, Dorrie

[Dorrie23]

I'm new too. And you hit the nail just right. He's the best. Has been there for me, when he barely knew me, when I'm facing some deep issue's. I was a little shy at posting, but after reading his posts and getting to know him some... I realized that's what I joined here for. HELP. I usually am the one to give heart felt support to people. But my life's been such a circus the last year, and worrying about my older sons, my nerves got the better of me. But I'm not a quitter. I had a therapist, an actual good one, tell me one time, "If you never make any foul's, you're not playing the game right". At first I was like Huhhh. Lol. But It really helped me and made since later. I wish you a very Merry Christmas, and hang around. I don't have a lot of friends yet, but have received a lot of help in just one, right away. God Bless him. and you too. See ya around, hopefully. Dorrie :yawn: Have a big day ahead of me. An almost seven yr. old with lots of toys to unwrap and play with all day. I cant wait. Take care. Dorrie

[Enduronman]

Those words are very kind and thoughtful friend, and will make this Christmas day that much more special to me..I really appreciate this, more than any of these words can express..Many blessings.

Merry Christmas Dorrie 23!...

Chris...:)

[Enduronman]

Something good? OMGAWD!!!
1. I went to fix my car, it started..
2. I called the auto parts place that I always use to see if I had already put a starter on this car at any time?
3. I had, I get a free brand new starter, no questions asked. $100.
4. I'm going to go ahead and put one on, don't want to be stranded again....

Good news!!! RARE!!! :)

[Enduronman]

Free $100 starter,...engaged.
Gawd am I sore though...but, car runs again = $0.

Yay. :)

[Enduronman]

Rheumy:
1. Auto immune disease + fibromyalgia!!!...WTF?
2. Another new medication (gabapentin) because narcotics just piss me off, and make me even more aggressive...Hope it works!
3. Still sore everywhere.
4. He OK'd PT...Going to start that soon.
5. Still have to see Neurologist to figure out why I short circuit and look like I have CP.
6. Still have to see Neurosurgeon to see wtf to do with 3 herniated discs in my neck...

Yay?....IDK!!!

Thinking of you friends, it'll all get better for us at some point..

EmAn...:)

[Enduronman]

Well,..I had been warned what to expect but he just confirmed it all..
And the damn fibro thing was a new one though. They don't know how it got there, where it comes from, genetics, environment, stress (yay), and other diseases.
Just wondering about this (gabapentin) crap now...going to get it shortly.

Sheesh is right friend!!

[Dorrie23]

Hey stranger!! I couldn't go a day without harassing you. Wait...Haven't done That yet. lol. Just Playing. Strange, their not herniated, but I have three discs in my neck needing surgery, and my lower back and both knees due to severe OA. Went to three Neurosurgeons in Atlanta and I have a rare blood disease, and until I can get my counts down, they wont touch me. And they all said I needed it. I'm hoping, now that I'll have insurance done, I can get all of the things someone as young as me shouldn't have fixed on, one by one, as you too my friend. I like what you said at the end. There's a couple of times, I've gotten so tired of living in chronic pain, that I thought nothing was ever going to help my situation. But, I will endure it with hope, because I feel in my heart it will get better. So glad I met. Man..you were the first I've gotten to know then a couple of the girls. I hope to meet more in the new year to come. But thanks for you're friendship through my heartache. You have nooo idea how much caring words can help a hurting soul. Now, go work on a car and get it to me somehow!!! lol. And I want I nice older one too. Ha Ha. You'll here more about the color, and interior, etc... Have a marvelous evening E-Man. Your friend, Dorrie

[jessed03]

Hey stranger!! I couldn't go a day without harassing you. Wait...Haven't done That yet. lol. Just Playing. Strange, their not herniated, but I have three discs in my neck needing surgery, and my lower back and both knees due to severe OA. Went to three Neurosurgeons in Atlanta

Hi Dorrie23

Are you the same person as Dorriegirl25?

[Enduronman]

I love being harassed!! It's fun!
Yes, herniated, bulging, protruding, ...but with (11) different medications, I hardly notice it..LMAO!
You have a rare blood disease?..oh my.. I know about how that feels having things that are "rare"...(sigh)
The Rheumy I saw today had never heard that being a vegetarian was helpful to people that have autoimmune disease, and he is The Boss.???...hmmmmm
This chronic pain s**t is getting realllllyyy oldd..I second that!
Yes, you will make it through this, just like I will. I refuse to fail...Hence: Enduron Man..LOL!
You've got a friend here whenever you need one Dorrie, I should be pretty easy to find...
NO car break downs as of the last 2 hours. They're all up and running again. (at least mine are, my sis isn't so lucky..tranny went out. OUCH!)...
My dream car-----1969 Dodge Charger. I'll never have one, but if I had $40k to throw away then that's where it would go...YEE HAW!!!
Have a great night dear Dorrie!!..

E-Man....Chris of course. :)

[Enduronman]

That new med comes with all sorts of precautionary BS...The Pharmacist said don't take it with vitamins, or antacids, or milk, or holy s**t I don't even think about these 10 others!!! I tried something like this before but it made me....psychotic. LMAO!!! (carbamazepine)...never again! BOO HOO!!!....:)

[Enduronman]

lmao ...at my new avatar...I'm so easily amused. :D

[Dorrie23]

Hi Dorrie23

Are you the same person as Dorriegirl25?

Hey there, the answer would be a positive. Here's the real deal. I have friends, but none that understand some of the things I'm going through, and the conditions I suffer with, and cannot fathom it when I've tried to talk to them, so I was shoving everything inside. Thought about joining a site like this for a while. Didn't. But was about to have a breakdown, and came across this site, and was like "That's It". As I mentioned to someone else, people have their own way of writing, talking, sharing, etc... about things, and this was my ticket. But I was extremely nervous when I posted my very first question, which was about anxiety and medicine, and mentioned one of the reasons why I knew I was already having problems, and I guess someone didn't like the way I worded "why" I was anxious and panicky. I got a rather, well, uncalled for response to my comment. Not my question. It was my first time to post a question, I was about to throw the computer off the desk typing, I was so nervous, and didn't want to, nor thought it appropriate to give a lot of detail, and there is a lot of detail, to why I'm having major problems with my anxiety. The person that responded didn't know all the horrific details, or maybe he wouldn't have responded the way he did, but I was nervous and didn't say it the right way, and well, got offended and didn't use the site for a few days. Then I realized if I was going to join a board or site like this, my toes may get stepped on from time to time, and I needed to have broader shoulder's and tried to get back on and forgot to write down the dang password. I tried and tried to delete it. Couldn't. Finally I wanted back on bad enough I redid it. So there you go, and there you have it. And might I mention, that yes, I added you as a friend twice, because and our awesome E-Man were one of the very first two to welcome me to the site. And might I mention one more thing. Without giving any information or of which date and topic, you and E-Man had me rolling on the floor. I'm too banged up to roll on the floor, but I laughed so hard, I had a coughing spell I thought would never go away, and had to drink a couple of glasses of water. You two... Oh my!!! Have given me a many a laugh. Which, in my case, can be very therapeutic. So anything new going on in your life? That your not used to sharing with E-Man? lol. Seriously..if you have some interesting new news in your life, or ever want to jus say hey... I'm here. Take care man, Dorrie and thanks for the welcome

[Dorrie23]

Hey you!! What wild thing's going on today in your bazar crazy world. lol. You know I love ya. Ok, am I gonna get slammed for saying that???? I say that to everyone. Just like I call everyone Honey. Well, I try to be careful just who I call those, but I've just said them for years. Anyway, if its a no no, just slap my hand and it won't happen again? OK, you said help you would do, and help I need. This will make my tenth post, and I think I can add an avatar. Have no pics on the brand new computer, but will download one soon, but until then, where/how to get the Avatar? thanks E-Man. Have a great one. Dorrie

[Dorrie23]

E-Man, I tried taking it for severe nerve pain. It actually helped the short while I took it. It made my feet swell so much, I could fit not one shoe in my home on. I quit taking it, and the swelling went away immediately. They put me on Lyrica, and it did the same thing too. The Pharmacist said they were similar meds. I sure do hope you get to feeling better. Hang in there friend. Dorrie

[jessed03]

Hey there, the answer would be a positive.

I think I remember the thread, it was about your son.

You're getting younger anyway ;) you were dorriegirl25, now you're only 23! I'm glad you came back, you seem really nice.

I remember seeing you with 2 posts, but you were talking to EMAN like a friend. I wondered how you got so close with two posts, but it makes sense.

I can never be quite sure with EMAN. He is a practical joker. He already made a new account of a female so he could flirt with me.

You'll always have a place here, and friends in this thread Eman has created, that is completely true, so I hope you feel comfortable and relaxed to talk about anything you want, if ever you want to.

Now you have >10 posts, you're a real member lol. You can message people, add a signature, upload a pic. Anything you want. I hope you don't leave again. Eman will come and find you if you disappear. Read his biography, he says he's psychic ;)

I got a PM from the master prankster himself today saying he has 'gotten me good' so I am now living in terror :)

[Enduronman]

This....made me laugh and smile, CONSIDERING, that the (gabapentin) caused SHORTNESS OF BREATH, STARVED FOR OXYGEN, HEAVY CHEST, INCREASED HEART RATE, DIFFICULTY BREATHING,.and...when I called the fuggin Doc to tell him this...HE SAID TO GO TO THE ER I MAY BE HAVING A HEART ATTACK!!!!....

so...That, is how this day was going but thank God it's half life is only 4 hours er so...

I am OK now. I will throw that bottle into the roadway....YAY!!

Yes Jesse, I got you...you'll have to "find" the prank though..It's out there!! LMAO!!

EMan..:)

[Enduronman]

Hey there, the answer would be a positive. Here's the real deal. I have friends, but none that understand some of the things I'm going through, and the conditions I suffer with, and cannot fathom it when I've tried to talk to them, so I was shoving everything inside. Thought about joining a site like this for a while. Didn't. But was about to have a breakdown, and came across this site, and was like "That's It". As I mentioned to someone else, people have their own way of writing, talking, sharing, etc... about things, and this was my ticket. But I was extremely nervous when I posted my very first question, which was about anxiety and medicine, and mentioned one of the reasons why I knew I was already having problems, and I guess someone didn't like the way I worded "why" I was anxious and panicky. I got a rather, well, uncalled for response to my comment. Not my question. It was my first time to post a question, I was about to throw the computer off the desk typing, I was so nervous, and didn't want to, nor thought it appropriate to give a lot of detail, and there is a lot of detail, to why I'm having major problems with my anxiety. The person that responded didn't know all the horrific details, or maybe he wouldn't have responded the way he did, but I was nervous and didn't say it the right way, and well, got offended and didn't use the site for a few days. Then I realized if I was going to join a board or site like this, my toes may get stepped on from time to time, and I needed to have broader shoulder's and tried to get back on and forgot to write down the dang password. I tried and tried to delete it. Couldn't. Finally I wanted back on bad enough I redid it. So there you go, and there you have it. And might I mention, that yes, I added you as a friend twice, because and our awesome E-Man were one of the very first two to welcome me to the site. And might I mention one more thing. Without giving any information or of which date and topic, you and E-Man had me rolling on the floor. I'm too banged up to roll on the floor, but I laughed so hard, I had a coughing spell I thought would never go away, and had to drink a couple of glasses of water. You two... Oh my!!! Have given me a many a laugh. Which, in my case, can be very therapeutic. So anything new going on in your life? That your not used to sharing with E-Man? lol. Seriously..if you have some interesting new news in your life, or ever want to jus say hey... I'm here. Take care man, Dorrie and thanks for the welcome

This is awesome Dorrie!! You have me laughing now, reading about your laughter!!! BAAHAAHA!!

Hope you're having a great day!

E..:)

[Lee Grant Irons]

Hi Eman, Jessed, and Dorrie,

I have not been actively posting for a couple of days as I try to finish writing chapter 3. Thought I would pop my head back in for a moment, just to make sure I'm keeping it real. Eman and jessed still waltzing. Check. I could have said tip-toeing through the tulips, but they hardly tip-toe. And as pointed out in an earlier post, they are not gay, not that there would be anything wrong with that. LOL

Le

[Enduronman]

Hey brother Lee!

Glad you stopped in and hope you're accomplishing much in your works too friend...

Yes, a beautiful tulips field!! ABBHA!!

He is kinda cute, I must say...but it's just a "bromance" and none of that "hoemance"....LMAO!!

Keep posting friend.

E-Man..:)

[NeverToo...Fear]

I think I'd actually pay to see them waltz through a field of tulips.. could be entertaining.

That settles it; I'm putting Jesse & E-man up for bromance of the year..

[Enduronman]

HAAAHA!!! What do we win??.. A prize..surprise!!??? YEAH!! (I don't want a stupid plaque, btw) :)

[jessed03]

This thread is a beast. Over 2600 views, and now Cristas here it's gonna get bigger. Her milkshake brings all the boys to the yard...

@Lee: I love how you authors pretend that what you do is hard work, when really you just type a few lines out and then grab another coffee ;)

[Enduronman]

Bahaa!! ^^^^^^^^^^ hheaaaaaha!! :)

[NeverToo...Fear]

You guys win a trip.. somewhere sunny obviously so Jess can feel the sunshine.. it'd be good for him.

My milkshake bring, wha? Er, not if they're lactose intolerant...

[Enduronman]

Soy milkshakes!!! to tha yarrdddd....LMAO!!

[Enduronman]

Jesse is being battered by George the Giant Storm..I think...

[jessed03]

You guys win a trip.. somewhere sunny obviously so Jess can feel the sunshine..

She just wants us in Florida. She's tryna turn us into her gay best friends. Well I've got news for you sister... I don't play gay best friend for ANYBODY....

... For less than $20 and some White Castle!

[Dorrie23]

Oh my gosh hon, E-Man after you... I'll go bow and saw a prayer now. lol. thanks for responding. That was too funny him hooking you up already. I love it!! Yeah, you can pretty much tell you have a pretty cool dude as friend in him. He's serious and really helps you. And he's funnier than crap, and makes you almost pee yourself half the time. I'm gonna get you E-man!! Uhh.. just joking there buddy ole pal!!! ha ha! Take care, Dorrie

[jessed03]

Do you have a crush on Eman Dorrie ;)

Is it those big muscles?

[Enduronman]

I would do anything for $20 and some White Castle!

LMAO!!!...You would!!! :)

[Enduronman]

Oh my gosh hon, E-Man after you... I'll go bow and saw a prayer now. lol. thanks for responding. That was too funny him hooking you up already. I love it!! Yeah, you can pretty much tell you have a pretty cool dude as friend in him. He's serious and really helps you. And he's funnier than crap, and makes you almost pee yourself half the time. I'm gonna get you E-man!! Uhh.. just joking there buddy ole pal!!! ha ha! Take care, Dorrie

Hope you're having a spectacular day Dorrie!..I love the spirit and energy in your posts, it is very inspiring to us all!...:)

[NeverToo...Fear]

She just wants us in Florida. She's tryna turn us into her gay best friends. Well I've got news for you sister... I don't play gay best friend for ANYBODY....

... For less than $20 and some White Castle!

....Can't blame me for trying.. I didn't exactly want to put an add in Craigslist; young woman in need of best gay friends.

And there are no White Castles in my area! wtff?

@Dorrie
I just wanted to say hi and that I like your personality.. Very warm and kind.. and your crush(?) on e-man is kinda cute .... :)

[jessed03]

Shhh Crista, we don't know for sure if she's crushing on Eman yet :p

Yeah, I like Dorrie though, she's fun.

By the way have you noticed how much you're copying me these days. Just saying, I started the @Whoever thing, and the appearing offline? It's cool if you wanna use my style, but a time will come when I need a favour... And you won't be allowed to refuse!!

[NeverToo...Fear]

I learn from the best... I take what I like and implement it.. it's that simple.

And besides; Plenty of ppl here go invisible and do the @ thing !

[Lee Grant Irons]

@Lee: I love how you authors pretend that what you do is hard work, when really you just type a few lines out and then grab another coffee ;)

"jsdfkn knsdf ,nsaekfac ksdf,n ,asndf ,nasedf,"

That's as easy as it gets, and makes about as much sense sometimes. LOL The hard work is the editing and turning this into real words that someone can understand. Although, it is possible to "blah blah balh" with real meaning. If you are a Rush fan, here is a link to their Rock Hall of Fame inductee ceremony, where Alex Lifeson gives his acceptance speech. This is very funny.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2i2ZbJnkFEY

[jessed03]

I learn from the best... I take what I like and implement it.. it's that simple.

And besides; Plenty of ppl here go invisible and do the @ thing !

@Crista:
Hmm. I've got my eyes on you young lady... I have got my eyes on you.

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m94j08kbes1qaniafo1_500.gif

:)

@Lee: I wrote a book in 2011, around 140 pages. That was pretty tiring. It got used as part of a package for some anxiety program. Not sure where it ended up. It was mainly about zen, and relaxation though, so less of a logical theme. Made it easier to get through. I can imagine a book written by a physics teacher, involving goal oriented processes does indeed take it's take to set up! Serves you right though for making all those kids suffer through psychics for years LOL

[Enduronman]

"jsdfkn knsdf ,nsaekfac ksdf,n ,asndf ,nasedf,"..... "blah blah balh" with real meaning...of course

I love it!! Lee, this work is magnificent!!! I will "implement" (because someone used that big long complicated word) this plan!!...:)

[NeverToo...Fear]

@Crista:
Hmm. I've got my eyes on you young lady... I have got my eyes on you.

Likewise.. I'll be stealing some stellar style x)

btw, feel free to use any of my styles if you like.. it's the least I can offer.. ;)

@ Lee
What a profound acceptance speech ! I was moved blah blah blah blah blah................ :)

[Enduronman]

Hilarious!!! Happy Anxious People!!! weird......absorbing energy, must absorb.. LMAO!! :) @ LMAO!!

[jessed03]

btw, feel free to use any of my styles if you like.. it's the least I can offer.. ;)

Why thank you

<< @My avatar: How'd do you like me now dear ;)

[Enduronman]

<< @My avatar: How'd do you like me now dear ;)

WTF is it???....I have 0 idea..Looks like crumpled paper or a baby terradactil.. :)

[jessed03]

WTF is it???....I have 0 idea..Looks like crumpled paper or a baby terradactil.. :)

It's Cristas avatar ;)

[Enduronman]

I don't even know what it is!!!....Seriously!!!! HELP!!! explain.....:)

[NeverToo...Fear]

Why thank you

<< @My avatar: How'd do you like me now dear ;)

That's just f**ked up... Do you have any idea how confused I was for a second!! Grr....

(And by the way, E-man, it's suppose to be a picture of a crow flying.)

[jessed03]

That's just f**ked up... Do you have any idea how confused I was for a second!! Grr....

Lol I know same! I was reading my posts thinking they were yours.

Now you know what you do to me... I think hey Cristas not online, then BOOM... there's a post from you... Scares the life out of me. You're like a ghost :p

[Enduronman]

Now at least you know what my avatar @ avatar is..it's me!!!...:D

[jessed03]

@Enduro: Looking sharp in shades bruh

[Enduronman]

@James...LMAO!

Yes, my Neo shades (The Matrix) of course..

Thanks bruh!

[NeverToo...Fear]

Now you know what you do to me... I think hey Cristas not online, then BOOM... there's a post from you... Scares the life out of me. You're like a ghost :p
Hah, that's what you were doing to me in the first place!.. I have no idea when you're online and then a post appears. Now you know...scary for sure... :)


Hey e-man, your avatar reminds me of this smiley: :cool:

[Enduronman]

HAAHA!! I like that,,thank you friend. :)

[jessed03]

Hey e-man, your avatar reminds me of this smiley: :cool:

Hahahaha true!!


Hah, that's what you were doing to me in the first place!.. I have no idea when you're online and then a post appears. Now you know...

Alright... Well played. Let's be friends again ;)

[Dorrie23]

IDE usually put something funny but just got a call that my son who's in jail just got jumped again. Fourth fight with a leg thT almost got amputated in the service but a rod from his hip to knee is holding it together. Right after the wreck he found out he made Special For es and got discharged. My other son took too many Ecstacys and died for a few secs but paddles brought him back. Two weeks later my other son slit both wrists to the bone and stole a car in a blackout and is in jail now. I don't know how bad he is but they just said not good I'm thousands of miles away and just want to see his face. I'm FRIEKING out. Not crushing on E-man. He's the first one I told all this too when I joined and if not for his advice I don't know how is made it through Christmas. Great guy. I'm too stressed to be funny. Sorry Dorrie

[jessed03]

Yeah, what Frankie said. We joke when things are going easy, but when life is hard we are very serious.

That sounds so rough for you Dorrie. I am powerless to do anything other than wish you good luck.

I'd give you a big hug if I could. We are here if you ever need to talk things over.

[NeverToo...Fear]

IDE usually put something funny but just got a call that my son who's in jail just got jumped again. Fourth fight with a leg thT almost got amputated in the service but a rod from his hip to knee is holding it together. Right after the wreck he found out he made Special For es and got discharged. My other son took too many Ecstacys and died for a few secs but paddles brought him back. Two weeks later my other son slit both wrists to the bone and stole a car in a blackout and is in jail now. I don't know how bad he is but they just said not good I'm thousands of miles away and just want to see his face. I'm FRIEKING out. Not crushing on E-man. He's the first one I told all this too when I joined and if not for his advice I don't know how is made it through Christmas. Great guy. I'm too stressed to be funny. Sorry Dorrie

Ah, we all don't have to be funny all the time..I'm sorry you are being put through so much Dorrie, but I'm glad E-man was there to help you !

And I agree with Frankie and Jesse. We are definitely all here to help or talk ! ..And send lots of E-hugs. :)

[Saida4]

wow what a list!u really do have a good sense of humor.i think 3 or 4 of those will av me drowning in despair, u really do have strength in u man!keep on seeing the positive side of them:)

[Enduronman]

IDE usually put something funny but just got a call that my son who's in jail just got jumped again. Fourth fight with a leg thT almost got amputated in the service but a rod from his hip to knee is holding it together. Right after the wreck he found out he made Special For es and got discharged. My other son took too many Ecstacys and died for a few secs but paddles brought him back. Two weeks later my other son slit both wrists to the bone and stole a car in a blackout and is in jail now. I don't know how bad he is but they just said not good I'm thousands of miles away and just want to see his face. I'm FRIEKING out. Not crushing on E-man. He's the first one I told all this too when I joined and if not for his advice I don't know how is made it through Christmas. Great guy. I'm too stressed to be funny. Sorry Dorrie

It's pep-talk time, enough suffering because this isn't your sufferage to bear or endure..

Well, I went to yet again, fix my daughters car. She uses a cell phone charger in the car and leaves it pushed in all night. It's like holding the cigarette lighter in for 8 hours. Drained the battery. Had to take it out, bring it home, charge it, take it back, install it, and throw that damn phone charger across the street onto someones rooftop. I also put her into another car, it seems that the one she drives, doesn't agree with her in fact, I don't either at times more often than not.

When I went to take her over there to pick the car up, I noticed that my car has been egged. Yes, someone threw an egg at the front and back. They know that my daughter sometimes uses that car too. It isn't the first time something has happened to that car. Both hubcaps had been knocked off, kicked, broken. The hood had been crushed, someone jumped up and down on it. A dent above the door. Front parking light lens busted. and 3 flat tires, oddly enough, all on the front. I could see where they had hit something twice, rim slightly bent, yellow paint on the tire, and then punctured the next time. She is "bringing this on" herself, not me. Guess who has to fix it though? Yup, me.

She also has asked me 40 times, to use my "nice" truck because she say's that it won't break down as much. I say. "F**K THAT IDEA!" The company you keep, seems to have a desire and need to f**k your cars up (my cars) with vandalism, property destruction, damage, eggs, etc, etc, and someone even pried open the gas cover door and stole the gas out on Thanksgiving. They gave thanks, with my $'s and fuel. I usually walk away when she starts into the "I want to drive the truck" thing but tonight I told her to STFU because until all this shit stops, that truck doesn't leave the damn garage. I don't want it f**ked up too...they will f**k it up. She is "inviting" these f**k ups, hardships, struggles, frustrations, and it's driving a wedge between herself and many others apparently. She is just like me when I was 17, so I tend to be abit more forgiving. Her actions, are what my actions were. I ran with the wrong people too. Although, and even though, I told everyone (LEO's and Judges that it was the older boys fault) it wasn't. It was my own fault, my own actions, my own decisions, that landed me in the many places that I was tossed into and the doors were locked securely.

Also this morning, around 830am, my oldest (drug addict) daughter came in. I heard the door open. "Oh shit, nooooo not now"...She approached,..My first sentence, "Keep your drug f**kin drama away from me and out of this home". She said she wanted to (borrow) $50 until Monday. We'll see if it makes it back here. If it doesn't, and she approaches again, I will ignore her as if she doesn't even exists. SHE put herself where SHE is also, not me. Her struggle is not my struggle or experience to endure or bear.

I don't "worry" about either of them. I can't, or I wouldn't be of the sound mind (semi) that I am. I MUST hold it together, or I will be lost within all of this turmoil and troubles. Worrying, does absolutely nothing, to change nothing. It drains ones mind, spirit, soul, like a disease in itself. I can only "advise" them while they listen, and if they don't listen, which they rarely ever do, then who's choice or decision was that? Their own. Especially at 22 and 3 months from 18 years old. Adulthood is knocking on the door and you can only "hope" that they choose wisely.

I was not perfect at a young age either. I did everything, wrong. I was banned from a city of now 82,000 people. I was locked up with everyone that wasn't my particular race, color, or creed. There was usually one or maybe two others, but they weren't prepared for what that life was going to offer them so I distanced myself from them. I didn't want to be forced to protect them everyday and the only other person like me was segregated from me because we were both, way off kilter in the exact same ways. They wouldn't allow "us" to coherce or communicate, for good reasons. We would've created more havoc, chaos and pandamonium then they wanted to handle. I was beaten, by 11 others at one time. Ended up chained to a hospital bed, battered, bloody, and disoriented. From that point forward, I was held in a dark, cold, wet (leaky roof) place called Deadlock. Locked in a 6x8 cell for 23 hours a day and unable to do a damn thing about it. The only person I saw was a guard walk by every 3 hours and they just looked, and walked on by. I finished my time at that place, in that cell. They said it was to protect "me". Bullshit, they knew what I was going to do Dorrie.

What is the point of all this? What a f**ked up story....

The point is dear friend, you can only "do" so much for your young, your offspring, your children, and you can not prevent anything that may and or may not happen to them either. You must stop this worrying. It is they, that put themselves, where they are. Not you..not your weight to carry.

You may think initially that all this seems somewhat harsh, uncompassionate, uncaring, but you must also decipher exactly what compassion and caring means? Does it mean crying for them nightly or wishing that they wouldn't have done what they did? No, because you can not ever change the things that have been done, you can not change the past, you can not take these events and turn them around and or go back in time either..What's done is done, can't take it back.

Let them learn, in the manner in which they have chosen to learn the rules, laws, regulations, stipulations, as written for them to follow. If they ask for guidance, then offer it. They will learn through these hardships and struggles in their lives, and they will stop doing these things once they see (1) thing. That (1) thing is "How do they, affect the other people in their lives, that love them and they in turn love also"..They've already seen enough. Stop revealing the worry, fret, fears, and voicing concerns that you can do nothing about to change. Let it be. Let them be.

That's how I changed, that's how I "let them be", and in all reality, my kids as well as yours, already know what's right and what's wrong to begin with...they just flirt with the wrong's with more frequency but they'll see the big picture, when they so choose to do so..You can't control that either, as much as you may try.

Relax, chill, stop the fretting, enjoy the one chance that you have to live this life and wait, be patient, and push ever so slightly when you see that the time is right to actually get through and inside their minds..they're human too, individual, unique, one of a kind..even though there's 8,000,000,000 of us.

There's some suggestions, take out what you wish, toss the rest aside, because ultimately it is yet again, your own decisions and choices..just like their own were.

Yes, stressed, but in control. Shoot for that. Show them "strength" of character rather than what they presently see and then watch how they react friend..

Hoping for better days, for us all.

Enduronman..:)

[Enduronman]

Adrenaline? awesome..
My daughter had told me at 3pm that she was going to have my Grandson over to spend the night (which meant that she would be here to chase him, I can't obviously)

Then she calls me at 5pm, to ask if I will go get him? Um, why? Because, now she's found something else more important to so..is my take on it.

I say no, and I can't chase him around here or entertain him. She was "thinking" that I and her brother could just keep him overnight and she wasn't going to be here.

She then said that "I was a lazy m***** ******"...I hung up, and my brain went instantly into self-destruct mode. I thought about when she comes home, I knock her through this brick walls of the house, or destroy her entire room, or take my car keys and shove her out the door..

All of those thoughts happened in a second..I did none of those things, my heart is still racing, 35 minutes later..

What charged me? The comment. I'm far from a lazy m***** ******...I just can't go up and down stairs, or catch a 3 yr old anymore,..because of this ******* disease...

That's where it hurt me, to the core, because of her inability to be "sensitive" at 17 and understand that her Dad has a fuggin disease of the joints..after 18 months, it still hasn't quite "sunk in"...immaturity..

Just like what immaturity I would've shown to destroy her room, throw her through the wall, or flip her car over...

I'm trying to calm down still..

My "condition and disorder" reveals itself again, and of course, I have to "maintain" it. yay.... :|

[Enduronman]

YAY!! Nothing got broken, destroyed, damaged,..and I'm finally calm now 95 minutes later!!....Success!!...:)

[Lee Grant Irons]

I went through that stage of breaking things. LOL Good for you to hold that in AND get calmed down.

The next step is to learn how to not let your kids get a rise out of you. That is much more difficult, especially considering they know our buttons. So, we have to recognize our buttons, and then put a seal-welded stainless steel cover over them so that no one can push them.

[Enduronman]

I know I have work to do it that area for sure,..I blurted out some words back after hers of course..eeessshhh...

I think I'd like a suit of armour Lee!! :)

[jessed03]

I got your IM messages, I couldn't reply on the ipad bruh

'Who's this? Wanna be friends' lmao

You have something like 40 friends on here, don't you think you got enough now!!

[Enduronman]

BHAAHAHA!! Wow I got 40???...COOL!...

Ok, gotta go through every thread and make a comment now,..10 characters ONLY....gotta get 400 by 11pm! YAY!! :)

[jessed03]

43 friends bruh!!

You friend whore!!

[Enduronman]

WHOOOHOOOO!!! I like friends, friends give us meaning...friend whore!!! LMAO!

Later folks..my psychotic pea brain is roasted.

zzzzzzzz
:D

[jessed03]

Later bruh. come back rested. Plug your brain in to it's knowledge recharger.

[Dahila]

Dorrie I do not know what to say. Nothing I say makes it better. I am here, anytime you need me ....

[jessed03]

Dorrie I do not know what to say. Nothing I say makes it better. I am here, anytime you need me ....

Agree with Dahila. If you are reading Dorrie, I hope you are getting by ok

[Lee Grant Irons]

IDE usually put something funny but just got a call that my son who's in jail just got jumped again. Fourth fight with a leg thT almost got amputated in the service but a rod from his hip to knee is holding it together. Right after the wreck he found out he made Special For es and got discharged. My other son took too many Ecstacys and died for a few secs but paddles brought him back. Two weeks later my other son slit both wrists to the bone and stole a car in a blackout and is in jail now. I don't know how bad he is but they just said not good I'm thousands of miles away and just want to see his face. I'm FRIEKING out. Not crushing on E-man. He's the first one I told all this too when I joined and if not for his advice I don't know how is made it through Christmas. Great guy. I'm too stressed to be funny. Sorry Dorrie

Hi Dorrie,

Hope you are okay. Our kids are our greatest joy and greatest pain. We get the bad in order to also have the good. Just as Eman was noting here today. Not much we can do but accept it, accept what happens, and just give them all the moral support we can to do what is right and roll with the punches.

[Dorrie23]

Hey, my Sugar Daddy!!! What up???

[Lee Grant Irons]

Hey, my Sugar Daddy!!! What up???

It is almost 12:30 in most of Indiana right now, so he is probably in bed. LOL

[Dorrie23]

I haven't read what Dahila said, but I know it was good. I'm doing ok. You cant keep a good man down!! I am a man, you know that?? Not!!!! Lol Take care, Dorrie

[Dorrie23]

Honey, Your too cool. I'm ok. Well... maybe not all the way, but I'm a fighter, and I have to keep myself together for not only my family, but me too. My little guy didn't do any of this, and he doesn't need to see mommy crying. Obviously, it bothers him very much, and I don't ever want to do to him what was done to me when I was young. He's counting on me. I'm counting on me. Looks like a lot of great people here are too. Even though I love cutting up with E-Man, and the whole crushing joking around is fun, he helped me out when I first joined. The first like thirty minutes. I didn't care it was a guy. I thought it was neat as hell, to finally have someone to talk to and give me some much needed advice. Cant wait to talk to you more and get to know you more. And guess what. You helped in a major way, just by letting me know you care. No words were required. Goodnight, my new friend. How cool is that.?? Dorrie

[Enduronman]

Hey friends!

D-Girl, you're so bubbly and funny, even in the midst of total chaos and I admire that like you wouldn't believe! It's wonderful!!

I love all those ways that you communicate here too, they bring an energy into the forums that are very helpful to us all, even yourself...:)

Sugar Daddy is finally awake now! (after another pot of coffee of course) :D

E-Man...

[jessed03]

It is almost 12:30 in most of Indiana right now, so he is probably in bed. LOL

He may be in bed Lee, but Eman doesn't sleep... He simply closes his eyes and waits... for the next lot of anxiety folk to arrive after curing everyone the day before. ;)

[Enduronman]

Shot hurt like hell!! New nursie....eeessshhhh...she didn't dry off the alcohol!!!
Went outside, to see that my daughters car had another flat tire!!! WTF does she run over!!!
Doing great, other then that,..and got a line on some newer tires (4 of them) this morning too so that's what she'll get today. New tires!
Then, there's NO excuses....LMAO!

Have a great day all! :)