30 and feel my life is already over

[jayrob1984]

hi im new to this forum . im a man and nearly 30 ive always been a sensitive guy and had years of stress that started in my childhood. ive never been lucky in love and after about 5 years of a bad situation of watching my ex on a day to day situation be happy and get on with life while it was impossible for me to get a girl to even bump into me. i decided i could not stick around anymore ( there was other career reasons i stuck around) so i had to turn my back on a big part of my life and the people involved did not see my point of view. it ended in one of the biggest arguments of my life. a week later i went to bed and woke in the night thinking i was having a heart attack . i could not walk or talk and went yellow in the face. i went to hospital where they said my heart trace was fine and that it was a panic attack. since that day my life as never been the same . i literally went from the frying pan into the biggest fire you ever seen . i was about 26 at the time (i think).

ive had another relationship since then that ended badly and made my anxiety worse .

here is my point . im 30 and feel life is already over . im tired of it and worn out . i enjoy nothing and feel i will never find a good relationship . i don't feel im a bad looking guy . im 6ft 1, built and get called frank lampard quite alot (just so you got a idea) but i feel invisible to women . i cant be bothered to try anymore. im not interested in life . i cant stand modern day bollocks and politics and i defo dont wanna be a gangster rappa. i feel im the only guy in the world who feels this way ........... any advice pls ???

[hiswaywardgirl]

Sounds like you're going through a rough time, and you're feeling depressed. Breaking up and going through life changes can be extremely stressful. I just went back to school to change careers, and every new transition is setting off my anxiety like crazy. Just remember, it will pass, you won't feel this anxious forever. And don't give up on dating -- it might be good to wait until you get your anxiety more under control, but there are actual nice women out there, and you will find someone who makes you happy.

Sorry to hear that you were having panic attacks, those are awful. Are you still having them? Have you found any strategies for dealing with anxiety that seem to help?

[jayrob1984]

tbf my anxiety attacks have got alot better . its more that the experience as taken its toll on me . i used to be very athletic but aint now cuz muscle pain is a big trigger of my anxiety . but i feel more just tired and fed up of life .

my only advice on the panic attacks is that time is a great healer and when it happens to really get in the mode of telling yourself its nothing and convincing youself of that .. .... which i know is easier sad then done

[Nathan415]

I know exactly what you mean about the "gangsta rappa" thing. I think rap is the laziest most un-poetic way for some narcissist to explain how awesome he thinks he is. For some reason society has decided its amazing art. Ha ha, oh well, I have a feeling our kids are going to lecture us about how dumb we must have been.

There are a lot of awesome apps and sites for internet dating. If I were single and trying to meet someone serious, I would definitely go that path.
The idea of its weird, but so is everything when it comes to meeting new people.