Health Anxiety--so consuming! And my latest...

[juliemagoolie]

I have had health anxiety since I had my first child 9 years ago. It all started from post-partum anxiety and I had never had anything like it before. I am so fearful I am going to die and leave my husband and children. I cannot have a headache or a heart palpitation without thinking it is something very serious. All around me people have cancer. My sister, my cousins, my friends...people all under 40 yrs old. I cannot even hear the word without panicking. I have had cat scans, MRI's, tests...all negative, and all doing more harm than good. So, here is what is happening with me now...Please let me know if anyone has had the same kind of symptoms.

I have had sharp head pains for months. You know you should never google symptoms, but I do anyway. Most say cluster headaches, probably nothing serious. But, they happen at least 10 x a day and all over my head. Secondly, about 2 months ago, I started getting what felt like menstrual cramps, but all the time. On top of that, I have lower back pain and a change in bathroom "stuff." I immediately jump to the conclusion it is ovarian cancer (thanks web md) that has spread. Thinking I have a serious disease consumes me and it's not that I am afraid of dying, but I am so scared to leave my family.

In the last 2 months, three people I know have died of cancer. One was 36, one 26, and one 40. (All local and I live in a small town.) My cousin's husband just died, my cousin just found out he has leukemia, my sister was given 6 months. (She is kicking cancer's butt, though!) It is everywhere. Anyone else dealing with the same kind of thing? Would love to hear from someone that understands. Most people in my life just don't. Thanks!

[StaceyK]

Hi, I know you posted this a while back - I'm Going through same thing. Please reply if you would like to chat

[worriedmummy85]

I am also going through the same thing I am terrified to leave my partner an my 3 year old

I also suffered from headaches for months until it got to the point no amount of pain killers where working

My dad died 2 years ago at 52 very suddenly with pneumonia and sepsis and slowly but surely my mind has chipped away at me everytime I was unwell I looked at google to see how serious it could be

Until 7 weeks ago I had a migrane and I thought I was having a stroke ( so did the medical service) that sent me into blind panic and ever since then I am constantly looking for stuff any pains anything I immediately think of the worst before I can think of the positive

Always hear to talk

[StaceyK]

Hi,
I can relate in to what you are going through. I lost two relatives within the last year to cancer; 14 months ago my 5O yr old aunt to cancer and most recently my gran of 71 to cancer (August).

I've always had Heath anxiety and generally quite an anxious person, but come September something hit me. For 3 weeks I was convinced I was about to take a stroke or brain hemorrhage. My apetite went, I've lost 1.5 stone and my eating is very up and down. I'm totally fixated on cancer. In the last 5 weeks my focus has been; ovarian, adrenal and liver cancer. I constantly check my urine and stools etc for blood and just 'feel' like I'm dying. It's torture.

I get symptoms like nausea all time time and I'm scared of being/feeling sick. Was getting tension headaches but they have gone. Just now left with feeling like I have no future, nausea, lack of appetite and often feel like what's the point in going on as it's torture. My Heath anxiety totally consumes me. Ive not slept in 3 nightspot so went to thy doc today (for the 3rd time in 7 days). I have two docs who don't think I have cancer and that it's an anxiety issue. Just got prescribed some diazepam today to calm me down and don't anti nausea pills. I'm waiting on a phone call tomorrow about CBT as it's meant to be really good, I've been getting general counselling but it doesn't help with the health thing as it doesn't challenge my thoughts.

How are you today ?

[worriedmummy85]

I was very edgy this morning I felt I could hardly breathe walking to the doctors

I went in to tell him about my concern about my chest pains he dismissed it straight away by listening to my heart and said its def not your heart

I also thought the propanolol was causing my attacks over the weekend but seems not to be he said I needed a higher dose so upped me to 20mg and I feel great he only gave me the diazepam incase I have an attack but these meds are killing my sleep and with a toddler up at 6 am and me up every hour I am exhausted hoping it might take the edge off tonight

I had an initial assessment for CBT last Friday they decided I needed face to face CBT but told me it would be quite a wait but within 2 hours she rang back with an appointment for this Friday I am gathering they thought I was a priority

Have you had your initial assessment for CBT or you still waiting? Are you on other meds? Xx

[shellsjack]

I have had health anxiety since I had my first child 9 years ago. It all started from post-partum anxiety and I had never had anything like it before. I am so fearful I am going to die and leave my husband and children. I cannot have a headache or a heart palpitation without thinking it is something very serious. All around me people have cancer. My sister, my cousins, my friends...people all under 40 yrs old. I cannot even hear the word without panicking. I have had cat scans, MRI's, tests...all negative, and all doing more harm than good. So, here is what is happening with me now...Please let me know if anyone has had the same kind of symptoms. I have had sharp head pains for months. You know you should never google symptoms, but I do anyway. Most say cluster headaches, probably nothing serious. But, they happen at least 10 x a day and all over my head. Secondly, about 2 months ago, I started getting what felt like menstrual cramps, but all the time. On top of that, I have lower back pain and a change in bathroom "stuff." I immediately jump to the conclusion it is ovarian cancer (thanks web md) that has spread. Thinking I have a serious disease consumes me and it's not that I am afraid of dying, but I am so scared to leave my family. In the last 2 months, three people I know have died of cancer. One was 36, one 26, and one 40. (All local and I live in a small town.) My cousin's husband just died, my cousin just found out he has leukemia, my sister was given 6 months. (She is kicking cancer's butt, though!) It is everywhere. Anyone else dealing with the same kind of thing? Would love to hear from someone that understands. Most people in my life just don't. Thanks!

I'm I the same boat. So so so scared of leaving my husband and children. Had a plugged ear for 3 months. It feels like if causes my gland to be slightly swollen. Terrified it's some gland cancer. No appetite. At the ocean on vacation today and can't barely relax. What if this is the last vacation I get? Really really hate living like this. Always afraid every ache or pain is a disease. I hate living scared when people close to me are sick or dying, I get terrified all over again. Never ending.

[seal]

I am feeling the same way, it's like I can almost feel my self or see what it's gonna look like when I die. I get so worried cause I know people that have died because they couldnt get to the doctor. I am afraid to do anything I don't want to leave my house, I haven't been able to work. I have always been prone to anxiety and worrying but recently this has just spiraled out of control. I have been to the doctor so much in the last month that the doctors seem to be annoyed with me. I am supposed to go back to work tomorrow after 2 weeks off and I am scared.

[shellsjack]

I am feeling the same way, it's like I can almost feel my self or see what it's gonna look like when I die. I get so worried cause I know people that have died because they couldnt get to the doctor. I am afraid to do anything I don't want to leave my house, I haven't been able to work. I have always been prone to anxiety and worrying but recently this has just spiraled out of control. I have been to the doctor so much in the last month that the doctors seem to be annoyed with me. I am supposed to go back to work tomorrow after 2 weeks off and I am scared.

So sorry. We suck lol. I'm in a cruise with my family and should be having a great time. Instead, I spend half the time worrying. And MIT being able to cone to this site as an outlet sucks too. Were in Florida today do I have phone internet but back in boat at 6 and will without phone/internet again until Sunday. I have do much to be thankful for but spend my time worrying about dying. And everyone does, I get that. No one gets out of life alive but in so so scared if it every day. Been like this since I was a kid. Now 40 and it gets worse. I can be totally find for weeks but one small ailment and it's downhill for weeks.

[anxiousdad75]

I am right with all of you. Particularly bad the last week. I have had a trip to the ER over the last month and two blood tests. Docs say I am fine. Now though I think I am losing weight for no reason and just feel spent. Convinced something is wrong. I was diagnosed with GAD and panic back in 1998 - ever since then I have had cancer or some other disease almost monthly. I have been on meds - from prozac to pristiq and in cognitive therapy for the better part of those years. Very difficult to find people who understand or not think I am being silly.

[anxiousdad75]

and I am annoyed at regular doctors that think I am being annoying.

[shellsjack]

I am right with all of you. Particularly bad the last week. I have had a trip to the ER over the last month and two blood tests. Docs say I am fine. Now though I think I am losing weight for no reason and just feel spent. Convinced something is wrong. I was diagnosed with GAD and panic back in 1998 - ever since then I have had cancer or some other disease almost monthly. I have been on meds - from prozac to pristiq and in cognitive therapy for the better part of those years. Very difficult to find people who understand or not think I am being silly.

Yes. I have like 3 friends that totally "get" me cause they are the same. We make fun of each other all the time. But we know our feelings are real.

[anxiousdad75]

Yes. I have like 3 friends that totally "get" me cause they are the same. We make fun of each other all the time. But we know our feelings are real.

So true. It is just so difficult to get beyond because we are always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I imagine the day I actually do have something will be a relief to some extent. lol

I constantly have what I refer to as "inward eyes." I am consistently scanning my body from the inside for what must be wrong. My ability to be present or even participate in the world the way everyone else does is limited. Some days (like today) I just can't and try my hardest not to rush myself to the ER or start googling symptoms.

[worriedmummy85]

There's only my mam that understands me even my partner doesn't to an extent he tells me he does but always shrugs it off like its nothing

My doctor is really nice he has been really good after trying to push other doctors for some help

[StaceyK]

My partner doesn't get it, but is sympathetic. My dad understands as he had it n his late 2os ( I'm almost 32).

I'm having to go private with CBT as I don't want to wait another 5 months on the Nhs service - I will just get worse ! It's crippling, I really wouldn't wish health anxiety on anyone. Did you sat you are starting CBT? As for meds, I've tried citalopram and hated the side effects. My take valuim now and then to help me sleep as my sleeping us awful ! Iwake up at 3am feeling sick and anxious

[worriedmummy85]

I start my CBT on Friday and I am on propanolol and I have Valium but haven't took it cos haven't needed it but if my sleep still gets disturbed by the end of the week I will take one to get a full nights sleep

[StaceyK]

How do you find the propanolol? Valuim is a bit too awesome - highly addictive though hence why they prescribe low amounts. It's really does help with sleep though. CBT is meant to be brilliant for anxiety - but people need to put the work in. Will let you know how I get on with mine tomorrow :)