Anger and frustration mixed with intense fear

[mashedpotato]

Hi everyone,

So I've been having panic attacks and just general anxiety problems for the past 7 months now. In the past 2/3 months though they have become really apparent. Heart racing, pounding- sometimes my pulse gets up very high, 148bpm was my highest recorded, worrying, feeling as if i'm having a heart/attack stroke, clammy, sweaty hands, numb limbs and face the list goes on! I got my boyfriend to rush me to the hospital twice, thinking i was going to die- one of these times being last night! Nobody will listen to me, or barely take me seriously. The only people who ever care about what I say are my fella and the woman in the advice centre in university, who kindly got me an appointment with the counsellor in there. I've been to see her once so far, and said she couldn't see any problems in my life- everythings going grand, relationship is great, family life is great etc., so she was a bit baffled herself as to why i've been experiencing these attacks! She asked me to write down all the panic attacks and anxiety i get in a week, the times they happened, what i was doing, who i was with just to see if there could be anything she can spot, and i'm bringing in the list to her on Thursday at my next appointment.

As far as medical professionals go, or if I could even call them that - they don't seem to really give a rats about me or my symptoms, and every time i try and see someone about it they say ''you're fine, you're young''. I came in to them, and was told after 8 hours of waiting, tests and heart screening that is was 'just' a panic attack. So i went to see my doctor and he told me he doesnt prescribe any tranquilisers, benzodiazepines or anything like that, especially to anyone young (i'm 21) and just seemed to fob me off, told me to get 3 sessions with the counsellor then come back to him. Ended up in the a&e last night in the hospital, had chest pains, numbness etc, was left waiting for 30 minutes before i was assessed by a very rude triage nurse. The first thing she asked me, with me being in tears was ''did i snort cocaine or anything'', which i certainly did not. She didn't even ask me was i ok, nothing. She then asked me was i smoking cannabis, to which i answered yes (it relaxes me through the attacks or when i'm feeling down about them). she then felt the need to write this on my file, give me dirty looks for the rest of the consultation, not make any eye contact with me and told me that i was ''probably just paranoid, cannabis makes you paranoid'', and put me in the least priority category, so after an hour I up and left. Wasn't going to sit there for 8 hours to be told by a doctor it was 'just' another panic attack. I have never met a more horrible nurse in my life, i mean for all she knew i could have had a heart attack and she looks at me like i'm some drug taking scumbag. :( This made me really sad, nobody ever takes my symptoms seriously.

I need help, I'm in bits EVERY DAY, at least once, and mostly at night. I think there has been 2 days in the last 2 months when I havnt been anxious/had a full blown panic attack. I've been taking herbal tablets with 400mg valerian and some hops and passionflower to try to calm me down but nothing seems to work :( Some nurofen plus (ibuprofen & codeine) help with the pains i get from the anxiety and to calm me but I can't allow myself to take codeine for long periods of time. I have so much work to do, I'm in my final year of my degree and I have a horrible feeling I'm not going to pass the year because of these. I need help from someone who isn't going to judge me and fob me off because i'm young. Anxiety and panic attacks can happen at ANY AGE!!! I don't see why they won't treat me. I'm down to my last nerve at this stage, i'm so irritable with people lately and am feeling depressed.

Where can i go to get proper help???

[simong]

Hi, seems like your suffering badly. Only things I can point out are you may have GAD. No triggers you are just prone to anxiety. The other thing is your symptoms appear to be really bothering you. This is my problem. The symptoms cause a worry about overall health leading to anxiety leading to more symptoms.

Over time when you "get used to it" the symptoms are more of a nuisance than threat and it eases.

[Perses]

Dear Mashed,

I can assure you that everyone here takes these symptoms very seriously. I have never smoked weed myself, but I've noticed on this forum that some people have had a bad reaction to it. So, I'd encourage you to try to do without it. Just reading your post, it strikes me that perhaps what you might be anxious about is what's going to happen after you graduate. You are certainly worried about completing your final year. Perhaps, you might be sabotaging your chances to graduate because you are anxious about what comes next. Just a random thought. It's important to keep in mind that some some people suffer anxiety for no apparent reason. You don't need a reason to be anxious, it might be a part of who you are. You mention that your therapist can't see any problems in your life, but then what do you think is going on.

It's definitely true that panic attacks can make you feel just horrible, as if you are going to die. So, if possible, try to separate the physical symptoms of your anxiety from the anxiety itself. The physical symptoms will not kill you; they are flight mechanisms going into overdrive. Now, I admit that it's really hard to keep mentally calm when your body is in overdrive, but counting backwards in groups of 7 is one thing, drawing circles on your stomach with one hand while using the other hand to pat your head is another trick to occupy your mind. It's important to keep repeating to yourself that the panic attacks will pass. Don't fight them, let them wash over you.

I would talk to your counselor and see if she can recommend a psychiatrist for you to see, someone who is in a position to never think that something is "just" an anxiety attack. At all the universities I've been to, it's been very easy to see a psychiatrist. You might be a good candidate for an anti-depressant, which are usually the first line treatment for anxiety these days.