Jcsmith0817
10-05-2013, 08:50 PM
Hi Everyone, Here is my story as of today, Oct. 5th 2013!
I have had enough of this so-called Anxiety, A demon that drives anyone too the brink of break-down, laziness, depression and no way of thriving and setting goals in life. Anxiety has many forms and many ways of making us feel so down. it breaks our walls and makes us suffer day to day. Making us stay indoors, fear exercise, fear working, fear social gathering. Anxiety is a beast that seems as if it can never be tamed, but it can be tamed! It can be defeated as long as you believe and trust in yourself. Anxiety won't cure itself over others telling you your okay, it won't heal with laying in bed and letting each and everyone of your lives go by, it is all up to us deep inside to rebuild those walls and to become as strong as we one were before the anxiety became a world war in our minds and bodies. I am great at advice and always have been, but too myself I never was good at telling myself my own advice and believing it. Here's my story on how I am overcoming this Anxiety, and how it all began.
It was March, a nice summer day, I was in collage, working a part time job, financial issues and stress of upcoming finals, getting over and abused relationship that I had truly hard feeling for her and looking for a new job.. It was about 7 A.M When I woke up to go golf with a few buddies at a local golf course. I woke up feeling foggy, sick, dizzy, and really off balance and tense.. I took no mind too it and headed out to the course. Once there I felt worse.. Grabbed some water and we teed off. I was shaky from the start, feeling lost in a fog. My friends were laughing and cracking jokes and I sat there, In what I called it "No Mans Land" I had no feelings what so ever, as it is called depersonalization and derealization. Panic began too set in after I got a muffin at the turn, I felt so sick, Like I was about too die, Heart was pumping, on edge, scared, feared, felt like I was going too faint at any moment. I told my friend at that moment halfway down hole 10, "Take me back! I feel so sick, I need to go, I'm going to the ER" At that moment, my best friend noticed I wasn't the same from the beginning of our round, he took me back and I jumped in my car, and hauled ass too the ER. The panic attack shattered me inside and out. I never have been too the ER and felt so crappy ever in my life! I had dread that I was dying and this was the end of my life. They took me in immediately.
At age 23, 6'0" and a good weight as well as active, I didn't understand why I felt as if this was the end of my life. They immediately noticed I was dehydrated and put me on a I/V. Also connected me too the heart beat machine and my heart rate was jumpy. I was in a state of fear and could not calm down and relax so they immediately gave me a med to relax me. At that moment, they wanted too run several test on me. A C/t, Blood work, and X-rays on my chest, and lower body. As soon as all these test were done and over 6 hours in the ER, I found out some horrible news that shocked me to my core at the time. I was diagnosed with an arachnoid cyst, This set in my mind I was going to die from a brain tumor. I then was released and living my daily life was in fear. I took 2 weeks off of work and barely passed my finals. This setting off 5 more visits to the ER considered anxiety attacks, and another Diagnostic of Celiac Disease. I was in so much fear and depression it was ripping me too pieces! After a few months in about June I got a new job with everything I needed and a relationship worth anything, but still my anxiety lingered and effects me everyday.. to the point I just want too lay down or go back to the ER for more test incase they missed something. I was a wreck, AN considered to be diagnosed with health anxiety at a severe stage, I was given Clozapine to relax me and seeing a therapist didn't help me as much as I wanted it too. My GF still sticks with me and even though I get panic attacks at work I force through the madness and do my best with each customer. I have lost so much interest in life I feel as if it isn't worth living anymore. I don't have any energy to do what I loved doing and to make the best of it. I was in a state of depression, fear, pain, and felt worthless.
It is now October and I am still fighting this war. I want too put down all of my symptoms and see how many can relate to me, as this will be a huge backbone in dealing with my health anxiety, accepting it and defeating it! I know I am not alone on this!
My Symptoms:
* Heart palpitations,
* Headaches
* Blurry vision/ floaters / Lack of Focus
* Shaky hands and legs,
* Feeling faint, dizzy, off-balance, falling down sensations
* Feeling of Nausea, vomit, chocking, swallowing difficulties
* Shortness of Breath
* Extreme Fatigue, Muscle and joint pains
* Lack of concentration, focus, personality
* Feeling paralyzed when walking as if about too fall or faint.
* Always scanning myself for something too worry about!
* Feeling in a fog, empty, lost, scared, dread.
These are most of my major symptoms and I have had since Anxiety has started. any feedback would be great!
It is now October, And here are a few steps I have taken too make my anxiety less severe and enjoy life a little more, I have began to do more stuff again such as exercise, do things I loved doing such as music, golf and hikes. I take multi-vitamins, Stopped being a Google abuser on symptoms, and went on my new strict diet, though slowly working I hope this helps me feel better.
Thank you for reading and please leave any comments or feedback, that would be great! And I don't mind giving advice, I believe I just need it back now!
Thank you for reading
I have had enough of this so-called Anxiety, A demon that drives anyone too the brink of break-down, laziness, depression and no way of thriving and setting goals in life. Anxiety has many forms and many ways of making us feel so down. it breaks our walls and makes us suffer day to day. Making us stay indoors, fear exercise, fear working, fear social gathering. Anxiety is a beast that seems as if it can never be tamed, but it can be tamed! It can be defeated as long as you believe and trust in yourself. Anxiety won't cure itself over others telling you your okay, it won't heal with laying in bed and letting each and everyone of your lives go by, it is all up to us deep inside to rebuild those walls and to become as strong as we one were before the anxiety became a world war in our minds and bodies. I am great at advice and always have been, but too myself I never was good at telling myself my own advice and believing it. Here's my story on how I am overcoming this Anxiety, and how it all began.
It was March, a nice summer day, I was in collage, working a part time job, financial issues and stress of upcoming finals, getting over and abused relationship that I had truly hard feeling for her and looking for a new job.. It was about 7 A.M When I woke up to go golf with a few buddies at a local golf course. I woke up feeling foggy, sick, dizzy, and really off balance and tense.. I took no mind too it and headed out to the course. Once there I felt worse.. Grabbed some water and we teed off. I was shaky from the start, feeling lost in a fog. My friends were laughing and cracking jokes and I sat there, In what I called it "No Mans Land" I had no feelings what so ever, as it is called depersonalization and derealization. Panic began too set in after I got a muffin at the turn, I felt so sick, Like I was about too die, Heart was pumping, on edge, scared, feared, felt like I was going too faint at any moment. I told my friend at that moment halfway down hole 10, "Take me back! I feel so sick, I need to go, I'm going to the ER" At that moment, my best friend noticed I wasn't the same from the beginning of our round, he took me back and I jumped in my car, and hauled ass too the ER. The panic attack shattered me inside and out. I never have been too the ER and felt so crappy ever in my life! I had dread that I was dying and this was the end of my life. They took me in immediately.
At age 23, 6'0" and a good weight as well as active, I didn't understand why I felt as if this was the end of my life. They immediately noticed I was dehydrated and put me on a I/V. Also connected me too the heart beat machine and my heart rate was jumpy. I was in a state of fear and could not calm down and relax so they immediately gave me a med to relax me. At that moment, they wanted too run several test on me. A C/t, Blood work, and X-rays on my chest, and lower body. As soon as all these test were done and over 6 hours in the ER, I found out some horrible news that shocked me to my core at the time. I was diagnosed with an arachnoid cyst, This set in my mind I was going to die from a brain tumor. I then was released and living my daily life was in fear. I took 2 weeks off of work and barely passed my finals. This setting off 5 more visits to the ER considered anxiety attacks, and another Diagnostic of Celiac Disease. I was in so much fear and depression it was ripping me too pieces! After a few months in about June I got a new job with everything I needed and a relationship worth anything, but still my anxiety lingered and effects me everyday.. to the point I just want too lay down or go back to the ER for more test incase they missed something. I was a wreck, AN considered to be diagnosed with health anxiety at a severe stage, I was given Clozapine to relax me and seeing a therapist didn't help me as much as I wanted it too. My GF still sticks with me and even though I get panic attacks at work I force through the madness and do my best with each customer. I have lost so much interest in life I feel as if it isn't worth living anymore. I don't have any energy to do what I loved doing and to make the best of it. I was in a state of depression, fear, pain, and felt worthless.
It is now October and I am still fighting this war. I want too put down all of my symptoms and see how many can relate to me, as this will be a huge backbone in dealing with my health anxiety, accepting it and defeating it! I know I am not alone on this!
My Symptoms:
* Heart palpitations,
* Headaches
* Blurry vision/ floaters / Lack of Focus
* Shaky hands and legs,
* Feeling faint, dizzy, off-balance, falling down sensations
* Feeling of Nausea, vomit, chocking, swallowing difficulties
* Shortness of Breath
* Extreme Fatigue, Muscle and joint pains
* Lack of concentration, focus, personality
* Feeling paralyzed when walking as if about too fall or faint.
* Always scanning myself for something too worry about!
* Feeling in a fog, empty, lost, scared, dread.
These are most of my major symptoms and I have had since Anxiety has started. any feedback would be great!
It is now October, And here are a few steps I have taken too make my anxiety less severe and enjoy life a little more, I have began to do more stuff again such as exercise, do things I loved doing such as music, golf and hikes. I take multi-vitamins, Stopped being a Google abuser on symptoms, and went on my new strict diet, though slowly working I hope this helps me feel better.
Thank you for reading and please leave any comments or feedback, that would be great! And I don't mind giving advice, I believe I just need it back now!
Thank you for reading