JBrigg916
09-30-2013, 08:07 PM
Firstly if this is in the wrong place I apologise but anyway I'll try my best to explain what's wrong
Well I think what I had was an Anxiety attack (I'm not sure if I actually have anxiety but I think it probably is isnce it usually only occurs in social situations), so I'm going to try and go to the doctors tomorrow, but I will explain my situation below.
I have just started University, 2 weeks ago, I'm not too good around people, i'm not the worst but I'm certainly not the best, (mainly social awkwardness, although lately I've been thinking it's social anxiety) but since my college friends have mostly all gone to different places/doing different courses I've had to try and make new friends. I managed to make some 'friends', atleast I think they're friends since I feel like there're two diferent things, one telling me they are my friends and the other telling me that they're not really 'friends'; which then results in me getting extremely nervous and thinking about how, even though it is highly unlikely/irrational, they're talking about me behind my back etc.
I then start to feel depressed, stressed and like an outsider, like I'm sat at a table with them, but the table keeps getting longer and longer until I'm so far away, making me feel left out like an outsider, like I don't belong.
Furthermore, during our lunch break/group discussions etc, the part that is telling me that they're not really friends also tells me that they're actively ignoring me, like they don't want to be sat near me or include me; which even if they do include me I find it hard to communicate as I'm extremely nervous/anxious in addition to, when looking at them whilst talking etc, feeling like/imagianing that they are making fun of me inside their heads, thinking about what they are thinking about me etc.
This all compiles together and all I can do is go over and over it in my head, thinking how I should've said that isntead or done that differently how they all now think that I'm weird and wish they could ditch me but I'm just a burden. But no matter how hard I try to convince myself it isn't true and is irrational I always end up believing it in the end.
This goes on every single day; and worsens during the night, usually when I try to go to sleep, I haven't had much sleep in a while now so I've resulted in trying to force myself to sleep by constantly making myself tired.
But it's gotten to the point now where I feel like i'm going insane.
(I can't continue anymore for now, I've started crying again and finding it heard to breath so I'm going to take a break for now....I just really want some help).
Well I think what I had was an Anxiety attack (I'm not sure if I actually have anxiety but I think it probably is isnce it usually only occurs in social situations), so I'm going to try and go to the doctors tomorrow, but I will explain my situation below.
I have just started University, 2 weeks ago, I'm not too good around people, i'm not the worst but I'm certainly not the best, (mainly social awkwardness, although lately I've been thinking it's social anxiety) but since my college friends have mostly all gone to different places/doing different courses I've had to try and make new friends. I managed to make some 'friends', atleast I think they're friends since I feel like there're two diferent things, one telling me they are my friends and the other telling me that they're not really 'friends'; which then results in me getting extremely nervous and thinking about how, even though it is highly unlikely/irrational, they're talking about me behind my back etc.
I then start to feel depressed, stressed and like an outsider, like I'm sat at a table with them, but the table keeps getting longer and longer until I'm so far away, making me feel left out like an outsider, like I don't belong.
Furthermore, during our lunch break/group discussions etc, the part that is telling me that they're not really friends also tells me that they're actively ignoring me, like they don't want to be sat near me or include me; which even if they do include me I find it hard to communicate as I'm extremely nervous/anxious in addition to, when looking at them whilst talking etc, feeling like/imagianing that they are making fun of me inside their heads, thinking about what they are thinking about me etc.
This all compiles together and all I can do is go over and over it in my head, thinking how I should've said that isntead or done that differently how they all now think that I'm weird and wish they could ditch me but I'm just a burden. But no matter how hard I try to convince myself it isn't true and is irrational I always end up believing it in the end.
This goes on every single day; and worsens during the night, usually when I try to go to sleep, I haven't had much sleep in a while now so I've resulted in trying to force myself to sleep by constantly making myself tired.
But it's gotten to the point now where I feel like i'm going insane.
(I can't continue anymore for now, I've started crying again and finding it heard to breath so I'm going to take a break for now....I just really want some help).