Hallo, advice please :)

[skarsgardd]

Hi everyone

I'm new to the forum and I guess kind of new to the anxiety thing... thats a weird way to put it, I suppose, but yeah, I've only recently sort of accepted that I'm pretty much a very anxious person. I have been since I was a kid, but I didn't realise it was such a problem until it was a problem, if that makes sense.

I went to a doctor for the first time this week to talk about my anxiety, and genuinely felt like I was going to have a breakdown in her office, I was so not used to talking to anyone about this kind of thing. After we chatted for about an hour or so - she was really nice and patient - she recommended that I get CBT, and diagnosed a low dosage of lustral (25mg for the first week, then 50 a day) and some xanax for the first week too.

Its weird, I'm not the kind of person thats really comfortable with my own emotions, which is, I think whats causing my problems. The anxiety I've been feeling has pretty much gone hand in hand with depression, which I've had problems with since I was about 13 or 14 (I'm 25 now), so I guess I never though as myself as anxious, just kind of sad. But yeah, lately its definitely escalated and I find that I'm so oversensitive that the slightest negative comment can just send me spiralling. It used to be that I was sort of fine most of the time, and then I'd have bouts and sometimes panic attacks, but they wouldn't last long. Now I just feel anxious all the time.

I guess I still feel like a total... newb or something. That sounds insensitive, I don't mean it to be, its just I don't really have any coping mechanisms for this. Part of me feels positive that I'm getting help, and part of me just feels so hopeless about the future. Every day thats good is followed by two that are just unbearable, and when I'm feeling depressed, instead of like, being able to sort of just shut down and stuff, I freak out so much that I can't eat, sleep, miss work... I don't know.

Anyway, I'd appreciate some advice, I guess. Experiences with lustral? More information on peoples dealings with CBT? How does it work and is it worth it? I'm not sure I can afford it right now to be honest.

I'd also like to tackle my eating problem, because I've been in a very bad state of anxiety for about two weeks now, following something bad that happened in my life which I'm finding myself really unable to deal with and its affecting my eating. I get hungry, but as soon as I eat I feel sick. I never throw up, I just feel more anxious after eating, if that makes sense? I'm down to only eating one small meal a day, at lunchtime during work when I can make myself go in. I usually just eat a bowl of soup because anything else just makes me feel like I'm rotting inside. I also have this weird sensation in the very bottom of my throat, like there's a weird rock or something sitting in there, pressing on my back. I can swallow and everything, but it just feels weird, and seems to get worse when I'm hungry (which is all the time now :( )

Does anyone have any advice on how to make yourself eat? I don't really know what to do.

Sorry if this is all a bit tl;dr, I'd just appreciate being able to talk to people who get whats happening to me because I still don't really feel like I do.

[jessed03]

Hi

If you cant afford cbt;

Get a cbt book, and follow it through. It will still be effective.

Some people use cbt ONLY to address certain parts of anxiety. You can't do that, you gotta use it for ANY thought or belief that gives you distress, even if unrelated to depression/anxiety. You'll find stuff that disappears quickly, but some stuff runs deep. Thats likely to be what took you into anxiety, is is likely to be what gets you out when you fix it.

Simply working on Self talk, thinking patterns and unhealthy beliefs will help a lot. It won't be hard to do!

[jessed03]

P.s.

The eating problem is pretty normal, but as anxiety lessens, it goes. You dont have to eat 3 full meals daily, but try to eat nutritious simple foods. Cereal, some toast with peanut butter, dried fruits/ nuts, yogurt, milkshake, breakfast bars etc. Snack on them, eat half or one or two now and again. Try not to stress too much about appetite :)

[ceecee27]

I also suffer with my appetite, I eat one meal a day and sometimes snack once in the morning, I love food, but I go to eat and I don't feel like it, or I feel sick. one meal and a snack is all I can manage at the minute and even them I struggle, like it's become a chore. I drink 2-3 cups of coffee and 2 glasses of water a day but I still get dizzy and feel faint, I've been like this since February, I've lost over a stone in weight since.

[jessed03]

I also suffer with my appetite, I eat one meal a day and sometimes snack once in the morning, I love food, but I go to eat and I don't feel like it, or I feel sick. one meal and a snack is all I can manage at the minute and even them I struggle, like it's become a chore. I drink 2-3 cups of coffee and 2 glasses of water a day but I still get dizzy and feel faint, I've been like this since February, I've lost over a stone in weight since.

Ceecee!

Ceecee, Ceecee, Ceecee! 2-3 cups of coffee is kinda a lot when you have anxiety :)

Instead of drinking coffee, couldn't you drink a little milkshake? Maybe a light one made with soy milk or something? Not easy i know. I assume you don't wanna lose more weight right? A stone is quite a lot. Soups aren't too bad, especially the ones you drink in a cup. They aren't all that tasty though, but some can have like 300-400cals.

What have you done so far in regards to how you feel? Struggling since feb without things like appetite improving kinda isn't good, huh :-/

[jessed03]

Ah ok, sorry Claire, just realised you had your own thread where you have already answered these questions :p

[ceecee27]

Ah ok, sorry Claire, just realised you had your own thread where you have already answered these questions :p

Yeah I don't want to lose more weight because of it, I'm lactose intolerant so no milkshake, soy is disgusting lol I have milk in small doses , it is more manageable that way.. I do drink cuppa soups sometimes but I have a roll with them so I class that as a meal these days. It's tough atm but I'm determined to beat this :) thanks for the help

[NeverToo...Fear]

Hey Skarsgardd and welcome! :)

I had a feeling similar to what you are describing. That weird sensation at the bottom of your throat--kinda like someone is squeezing you and you can feel it through to your back. When you get that, try drinking some cold water and have someone (if you can) rub your back in that area where you feel it..in a sense it's almost like scratching whatever is inside you and it can help alleviate that feeling..I don't know how mine went away. It kinda just faded, but while I had it, eating was difficult. I would get sick just as you described. Try just eating several little meals during the day, just to get in some nutrition while not doing too much. It also helps to take your mind and distract yourself.. I use music a lot of the time or just something that takes a little thought like cooking or reading a great book..and you can always come here to chat as well! :) Hope you feel better soon.

[Lin]

I hope that you find the forum helpful and useful and you make some good friends on here. You can pick up some really good advice on here from people with lots of experience of depression and anxiety etc.

Lately I have been trying hypnotherapy and meditation to help with my depression and anxiety. You have to practise it every day but it does help. My psychiatrist and doctor recommended them to me.

I take lots of medication, but am willing to try anything people suggest to me. It is worth the chance something is going to work.

I hope you find something to help you.

[skarsgardd]

Thanks guys!

With regards to the appetite thing, its like theres something blocking me eating. I fainted on Saturday so have been trying to eat more, but its just so damned difficult. I can feel that I am more calm or just less sensitive since staring on the lustral, so I feel like the positive effects are outweighing the negative but yeah, I'd like to get back to a normal diet. I just don't care for food right now, I don't really appreciate the tastes or want it the way I used to. I hope that clears up anyway!

[Lin]

Welcome to the forum, i hope you find it helpful and useful. It is good that you have already sought medical help and I hope the meds help you out.
Eating is very difficult once it becomes a problem and it will probably take a while to get your other problems sorted first before you get your eating better.
Good luck and hope you make some friends on this forum.