Saw the cardiologist today

[HealthAnxNut]

Well, I finally went in to see someone about the arm and chest issues I've been having. He heard a slight murmur, and said it would not have an impact on health or anything, that it would come and go, and never cause me an issue. He said they are going to do a treadmill stress test, and also an ultrasound of the heart, so he can put my mind at ease. He went through a list of risk factors for heart disease/issues, and I have none of those risks. He really wanted to focus on the anxiety. He suddenly asked me, leaning in very close, and grabbing my hand - "Tell me, are you tired of dealing with it?" and I burst into tears. I'm not the crying type, but it was the right/wrong question at that time to just push my button. YES, I AM SO F*CKING TIRED OF DEALING WITH THIS. He said I had done a great job of handling it myself for almost 10 years, but maybe it is time to try medicine. I have always felt, for me personally, that this was giving in, and saying I can't do it myself. But he pointed out I wouldn't have to be on it forever. Maybe I just need a break. GOD, DO I NEED A BREAK. So, I'm going to try it. Part of me is torn, but the other part is relieved that maybe it will help. This doctor, I have to tell you - he was wonderful. He said neither he nor his wife would mind if I call and wake them up at 4am, because I think I am dying. He said he will help me get through it if I need him. I couldn't believe it. So, it's been a good day. High anxiety for the first part of the day, and a glimmer of hope in this second part.

[farrah01]

That's awesome! How nice to find a dr to actually LISTEN! Sometimes that makes all the difference.

[mistiblue]

That is so awesome! It's rare to find a doc who even cares, so praise The Lord! Your gonna be just fine!! Hold in to that hope, when you feel that nagging anxiety coming on again...hold on!

[tailspin]

That is really great news. Wow, what a fantastic doctor!! Really glad to hear you have someone like that in your corner! It's wonderful that he is being so thorough with your heart tests AND he is going to help you with the anxiety part. The best of both worlds for sure! Very happy for you!

[MegC]

Wow!!!!! Wish we could all find a dr like that! Very happy for you! What is this guys name?!?!? And if you don't mind sharing where you live??? I hope he really does help you and I too can see the glimmer of hope at the end of your tunnel! I dealt with my health anxiety for 10 years befor meds ..... They really do give you that stepping stool you need to see that it's all gonna be ok! I'm on very low dose of Lexapro and it has changed my life! Hope you can get there and prayers coming your way!

[HealthAnxNut]

Thanks everyone, for the support! I am nervous about the tests (aren't we all excited thinking of our hearts exploding on a treadmill?!) coming up next week, but I will be glad to have them over with. I live in TN, and the cardiologist is Dr. Abu at Vanderbilt Heart. It is surprising to me that he was able to break down my walls, but he was just very sincere. My primary care had tried, and also tried to give me a "break in case of emergency" med, which I refused. But honestly, I really did want it. I'm trying to keep positive, and not feel like I'm giving in.