Trouble Communicating with Boss

[jennypenny1243]

Several times when my boss is trying to explain something to me or have any kind of one-on-one conversation/interaction, it always ends up going sour! Either he doesn't like the way I am responding or there has been some kind of miscommunication. I feel that he always interprets our conversations as me being disrespectful or rude to him. He will then walk away and I am left feeling like an ***-hole. He is also very quick to believe "guilty until proven innocent". He will often tell me (and others) I messed something up. When he realizes that it was actually done correctly he will then take back his accusations and walk away.

I can honestly say that I am not normally interpreted as being a rude person so it can be very frustrating when he interprets me as being disrespectful with it is NOT my intention at all!


It stresses me out and because of my BPD I often over analyze interactions with others, get upset, and then lose control of my emotions. I just want to know how to communicate with my boss without getting so upset when there are miscommunications and I am made out to be the ***.

[LaFleur3]

I wouldn't take this personally. Unfortunately you are going to encounter someone like this in all forms in life and especially at work, whether it's a boss or a co-worker. It doesn't sound like you've done anything to provoke this so know that he is the one with the problem and most likely gets satisfaction out of this sort of management style. If it's really getting to you, try and have a conversation with him during a break or a time where it's not busy and he can talk, just tell him you feel like you've both been taking things the wrong way. If you need too, explain how you over analyze things sometimes and if he has any decency he'll most likely understand and at least make the effort to be a little more respectful at times, making peace with him is definitely the best way to go about it.

[TheBlack]

At work you need to be professional. This means to behave in an objective manner (do not bring your feelings into this). You have a job to do. If your boss is behaving in an unreasonable manner and it is affecting your job performance, you need to speak to him. Both of you need to understand each other and clear up any issues. Speak to him when he is not busy. Prior to speaking to him, work on what you are going to say to him. As I mentioned before you need to be in control of your emotions and not stoop to his level. Your better than that. Good luck and take care.