CuppyCake
09-05-2013, 02:04 AM
I've had anxiety and depression since I was very young, and it gets worse and worse as the years go on, but when I was 19, that's when it got really, really bad.
I have these weird, paranoid thoughts that I can't control, that I know don't make any sense. I always think people are going to think I'm going to steal their stuff if I get to close to it. I have a weird fear of objects. Not that I'm afraid of objects, it's that I'm afraid what people might think.
If I see someone's purse or food, I walk way around it because I always have this paranoid thought that they'll think I'm going to take something of theirs if I walk too close to it. And in turn, this makes me look suspicious. It's any object, really.
In stores, I walk way around cash registers and way around people with purses because of my paranoid thoughts. I avoid doors at all places because I always think people will think I'll go into a door or a room I'm not supposed to be in and mess with their stuff or something.
I know these thoughts don't make any sense and I know these behaviors are abnormal, but I can't control them no matter how hard I try. I've never seen anyone behave the way I do. Sometimes I wonder if I'm possessed by something or someone put a curse on me because of the way I act and the way I can't control it. I also always feel very, very foggy and like I'm in a dream 24/7.
What is wrong with me??? I don't know why I'm like this. Why can't I control it. I don't know what to do anymore.
I have these weird, paranoid thoughts that I can't control, that I know don't make any sense. I always think people are going to think I'm going to steal their stuff if I get to close to it. I have a weird fear of objects. Not that I'm afraid of objects, it's that I'm afraid what people might think.
If I see someone's purse or food, I walk way around it because I always have this paranoid thought that they'll think I'm going to take something of theirs if I walk too close to it. And in turn, this makes me look suspicious. It's any object, really.
In stores, I walk way around cash registers and way around people with purses because of my paranoid thoughts. I avoid doors at all places because I always think people will think I'll go into a door or a room I'm not supposed to be in and mess with their stuff or something.
I know these thoughts don't make any sense and I know these behaviors are abnormal, but I can't control them no matter how hard I try. I've never seen anyone behave the way I do. Sometimes I wonder if I'm possessed by something or someone put a curse on me because of the way I act and the way I can't control it. I also always feel very, very foggy and like I'm in a dream 24/7.
What is wrong with me??? I don't know why I'm like this. Why can't I control it. I don't know what to do anymore.