Intense fear...does anyone else feel this?

[leighlee]

I started reading threads yesterday and thought this might be a good place for support. I was wondering if anyone else has experienced anxiety with a phobia of being alone. It has completely debilitated me. It started off as anxiety, lots of stress, then loss. Then one day I didn't want to be alone when my husband was going to work. It then spun into not being able to being alone. My mom came back to live with me and my husband until I can get stronger. It has been two years. I have tried exposure, and I am just too uncomfortable. I started medication for the second time five weeks ago. I am so exhausted. I have seen a few therapists and feel like they have not been of much help. I gathered that I feel shamed and guilty for having anxiety and fear; having to depend on others. I just want my independence back. I feel so much pressure to just get BETTER. I have read countless books, try to only think positive things. I guess I just wanted to put all my feelings down to a group of people that I hope understand. No one seems to understand. I don't know how many times someone has told me to just be strong. I just keep fighting. Wondering if I will ever be able to embrace this life and live.

[epollock]

Leigh,
Dont rush yourself - it wont work. That just means youre doing it for everyone else. You need to do this for you and at your pace. If your mother moved in with you, that means she cares a lot about you. She prob wants you to do this for yourself as well.
Fighting is 1/2 the battle - I fight every single day. As I type this, I am fighting through the pains of anxiety (my arms and legs have sharp pains going down them - it sucks!) - - but I have finally gotten to the point where I know there is nothing wrong with me. Its my brain playing tricks on me and I refuse to give in.
Coming in here helps - it helps a lot. Its nice to know that there are other people out there feeling the same things.... which makes me feel less crazy!

Good luck! <3