Why?!

[jhunter89]

Why won't I go and get help? I'm fucking sick to death of being afraid of people and social situations. I've even started drinking everyday so I don't have to think about it. Being drunk is the only time I'm not nervous as hell. I tell myself ill go and speak to someone soon but then think nahhh I can't be bothered. I feel like I'm stuck in a revolving door.

[Ulli Blume]

Hi jhunter89,
it`s the same with me (sorry for mistakes, english is not my mother language): I knew a bigger anxiety attack was coming along on thursday, but did i go to see a doctor to reassure myself, that my heart and breathing ability are ok? No, of course not. Did I go to a drug store to get something against my heart burn? No. Because, as crazy as it sounds, our anxiety is also positive for us. In a wicked, stupid, self-destructive way. If you seek help, you`ll have to start to talk to People, and you fear of being rejected. So your anxiety helps you to keep away from the pain of being rejected, and thats something positive for your subconscious mind. Like I fear making mistakes at work, and not being employed any longer - so if it`s my anxiety, that keeps me away from work, it`s not my mistakes or bad work, so it`s not me. Stupid, because most mistakes happen from anxiety. Stupid us, but we have to fight against our subconscious and have to stand up against the easier way - and it is the easier way to keep anxiety, getting rid of it is hard, i managed to do it three times in the last 20 years, but it always waits for a moment, a chance to kreep back into my life. So we are fighter, and have to be fighters, to get over it again and again.
but trust me, it`s worth the fight!
Best, Ulli

[octopus]

Don't drink :(
Gotta fight it and drinking isint the answer. Try seeing a doctor right away.

[TaraJane]

I completely understand, and it confuses and frustrates me as well. I want nothing more then to feel better, and yet I resist seeking help. I am my own worst enemy :( I am tired of being miserable and yet I do things everyday that make me miserable. Why? I have absolutely no idea....