ImatypeA
09-10-2007, 12:24 PM
If only I had been able to access this type of conversation and sharing 15 years ago when I first started having anxiety attacks. Of course, then, I thought I was just dieing of some awful disease.
I couldn't understand what was causing all the twitching, fatigue, weird vision problems, slowed speech, etc...I was convinced there was no stress in my life, even as my body was telling me differently.
Now, after 7 years of counseling and 5 steady years of medication, I understand what is happening when I start fretting about physical symptoms in my body - it means there is something stressful going on in my life I am trying really hard to ignore. And even though I know this and try to be aware of how I am feeling, I still get surprised.
I am suffering through my first anxiety attack in 5 years and I am SO frustrated with myself. I am convinced I am dieing YET AGAIN. I thought I had been doing well with all the change in my life over the last year: left my job to get married and move to a new state leaving my sister and mother, renovated a house, and then dealt with the unexpected death of my mother. I thought I was handling things okay. Clearly I have not really been dealing with any of it, as I am convinced that this constant twitch in my jaw is Parkinson's.
Why is it that we manage to find new things to worry about? I am so sick of this.
I couldn't understand what was causing all the twitching, fatigue, weird vision problems, slowed speech, etc...I was convinced there was no stress in my life, even as my body was telling me differently.
Now, after 7 years of counseling and 5 steady years of medication, I understand what is happening when I start fretting about physical symptoms in my body - it means there is something stressful going on in my life I am trying really hard to ignore. And even though I know this and try to be aware of how I am feeling, I still get surprised.
I am suffering through my first anxiety attack in 5 years and I am SO frustrated with myself. I am convinced I am dieing YET AGAIN. I thought I had been doing well with all the change in my life over the last year: left my job to get married and move to a new state leaving my sister and mother, renovated a house, and then dealt with the unexpected death of my mother. I thought I was handling things okay. Clearly I have not really been dealing with any of it, as I am convinced that this constant twitch in my jaw is Parkinson's.
Why is it that we manage to find new things to worry about? I am so sick of this.