I am dying here

[ssaann]

I am not sure where to go. I have a therapy sesion Monday but I need to last untill then without doing something crazy.

here is is:
I am sitting at work. Anxious. Not sure what to do. Long tory short. There is a guy I like, who is definetly not a good fit for me. he used to text every day..and the texts are not daily anymore. He has 2 kids..I am 23 female and he is 30 years old. His kids are 3 months apart from 2 differnt women. I come from a reservd family. I am very reveresed. So culturaly, moraly..we are on opposite ends. I am

He clearly has no time for me since he also works 2 jobs on top of everything. Yet, I am fixated. Because I want to chase him. That's the truth. I want to win him and then leave him. Just so I can prove I am good enough. Yes, it is so damn sick to think like me.

I get a lot of attention from guys, yet I reject them all and just get fixated with one man. Not the first time this happens to me. It makes me feel so lonely in the process. Since I get obssesed about an unavailable man. I am venting, and I want you to tell me that it is all in my head. That He is not worth my time..becuas eI know he is not.

I am afaid he will stop contact with me..and I will lose him. Even though we are just freinds...and yes we do hook up sometimes.

I can't think anymore..my mind is foggy..It feels as if I am in a dream..I am not here..

[DodgingRain]

Hang in there. I can be in a room full of the opposite sex that are hot and still feel isolated and alone, sucks.

Can you find a new guy to focus on until Monday to distract you from the 30 year old? It's a terrible long term solution but it may get you to Monday.

Or is there something else you find that is really challenging that you can do to distract yourself for a few days? Or even something that's just intense and distracting like go take some sky diving lessons or something? When I'm in trouble something really intense can give me enough of a break to give me time to feel ok.