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View Full Version : Was i wrong to complain against my therapist?



missdel
06-13-2013, 04:39 PM
i have problems with social anxiety. my therapist asked for memories from childhood. I relayed a memory aged seven, worrying that my father had sexual feelings for me and that I'd never had a boyfriend. I said I didn't want one. In our fifth session his manner changed from his usual friendly self to aggressive. He barked 'sex' at me, and looked impatient. He asked 'are you embarrassed to talk about sex', 'why aren't you having sex', 'so you must have a great sex life' and 'are you gonna get a gf'. I asked him 'why should I have a boyfriend', and he replied 'I'm not saying you should have a boyfriend, I'm saying why don't you have one'? I said 'because I don't want one'. He then asked me if an arranged marriage was a possibility.

He also made unprofessional and critical remarks. Also in our fifth session, I told him that I had been thinking that I should just be more positive. He said 'well that's what you're seeing now' in a less than friendly tone. I also confided in him that I worry about people envying me. I asked what what he thought about having another session as I wasn't sure I wanted to see him again, he replied 'it's about what you think, unless you think all my other patients are going to envy you'.

i complained and the head of service replied saying he often tries to provoke his patients and thats what he might have been doing here, but i was left alot worse off than before, was i wrong to complain

Lin
07-13-2013, 11:24 PM
You were right to complain. We should always complain when we are not getting what we need from someone whip is meant to help us.
I had trouble with my community psychiatric nurse - she refused to see me last November to March. This was a particularly difficult time for me at work and I think it was the start of me going into the lowest depression I have ever had. In the end the crisis people told me that I had to complain as they were going to as well. In the end I wrote a factual letter to her manager just stating what had gone wrong, and some good bits. I hated complaining so kept to facts. I had to meet with her manager and he was really good, had taken the time to read my 4 page letter carefully, had read her notes on me, and was really quick to accept that she was wrong for me and gave me a new nurse. Since then I have spoken to other people who had the same problems with my old CPN so I am really pleased i had the courage to write the letter. I could never have got through this really bad bit without a new nurse.

Ryaan
07-22-2013, 05:37 PM
Number one - he's only human, he's no better morally than the bartender downtown.

Two - if your really pretty he may actually envy you and if thats the case, he has no intentions of helping you, he may just want "a piece" of you,

Three - i'm a boy, and my therapists are always woman, ( attractive ) too, they are all really nice lady's but I find they are really mainstream and fresh out of school (not the most intelligent).

Four - sounds like u should be speaking to a woman instead of a man.

Five - i know what you mean by not wanting a BF, you want to be happy and healthy on your own before you go looking for a relationship or sex, witch is good.

samb1155
07-27-2013, 09:38 AM
Your not wrong at all, if you feel he is making it worse or not doing what he should do then its your right..... If you went into a restaurant and asked for a salad you would complain if they brought out a massive burger and chips!! To me he's effectively doing the same.