Depression. Telling my parents.

[AL1235]

My depression started when I was 14, I didn't get any help until I was 16/17 during my AS level. I did ok in my AS exams (3C's) and I became extremely depressed when it came to my final year of A levels. I had a lot of personal problems between my best friend and I at the start of the year, my cousin constantly abused me (verbally) even after knowing what I had been going through. I then decided enough is enough, confronted her and told her I want nothing to do with her, I scratched her face out of some family pictures, which my brother then found and got really upset. He threatened me to find the negatives for each picture to get every single one of them redeveloped. I stayed up every night looking for them, there was a few I couldn't find, it drove me insane and I couldn't sleep for days. It got worse and I couldn't sleep properly for 3 months. My depression got worse, I went into a psychosis due to the lack of sleep, the school made me see a psychiatrist and my GP prescribed antidepressants ( Citalopram 10mg ) and sleeping pills. I eventually dropped out of sixth form because I couldn't cope.

I pretended to go to school every day and I lied to my parents, I told them I got 3C's results day. I told my parents I wanted to take a gap year, this year I taught myself 2 whole A-levels ( Biology and Chemistry) I'm scared I'm going to fail because I don't wat to tell my parents about my depression & dropping out of sixth form.

What shall I do ?

[Anxious Abi]

Hey AL1235, you have my sympathies with what you've been going through. I too have suffered with worsening depression from my early teens, I also took the decision to drop out of sixth form due to being unable to cope, I understand how difficult it can be.
If you don't mind, I would like to ask why it is you feel you can't tell your parents about what you have been going through?
In my experience the added pressure of keeping something from those close to you is likely to have a negative impact. I think with depression it is key to have a good support network and open communication about what you're going through.
Abi

[mid]

I agree with Abi that the significance of pressure resulting from your choice to keep the depression from your parents is adding to your situation.

There are no easy fixes to this situation, either. If I were there, I'd walk you through the entire process, until you were comfortable presenting it to your parents. The best suggestion I can offer is to practice in front of a mirror to help yourself be more comfortable with this.

Best wishes.

[Loohna]

I was terrified to talk to my parents about my depression/anxiety. My mother is not a very understanding person, and I was really scared that she wouldn't understand or would think that I was crazy. I obsessed about telling her for months, and when I finally worked up the courage to tell her, she was very understanding and offered to find me a doctor. I can't guarantee that your parents will react the same way, but not telling them isn't going to solve anything. Whether they understand or not, you will feel so much better just getting it off your mind. I really hope that things get better for you.