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GeneralWorrier
06-01-2013, 03:54 PM
Okay I'm sorry for how long this is going to be but I really can't do it anymore, there's so much going on I feel like I'm about explode.

I'm 17 and have suffered anxiety for 2 years, it's been fairly average over this time but it's definitely turned high over the past 3/4 months and I'll explain why in a second but the thing that's tipped it is that my teacher at sixth form has recently been asking how I am, I've noticed he's paying attention to me a lot more than before, always tries to catch me on my own. As this is a small sixth form the classes are very small, in my sport course there are only 6 people, 1 of them is rarely there as it clashes with English but anyway that cuts it down to 5. He'll ask the others to go and do different tasks until it's just me in the room and he'll ask me if everything's okay. He's such a nice man, I see him more as a friend than a teacher. But his wife is expecting a baby any minute and he's already a teacher as it is so that's hard enough. I always say I'm fine and that I'm just tired which has bought me time but I think he's trying to get other people involved and I'm so scared. This is what's been going on recently in my life:

- I've just been diagnosed with PCOS and my ovaries are full of cysts, after weeks of tests I've now been told I won't be able to have children in the future. Without wanting to sound cheap, I've always wanted to have my own family and being told at my age I won't be able to is kind of hard.

- I'm being tested for uterine cancer as they think there may be a link, just awaiting the results now.

- My dad has moved away (split with my mum when I was 7), he now lives over 5 hours away and he didn't even say goodbye. He's now too busy with his 'new family'.

- 2 of my relatives died in a car crash 4 weeks ago.

- 1 of my relatives died 2 weeks ago of old age as I was there, I usually looked after her as we were a mischievous pair! Haha, I loved her dearly and we were watching some rubbish film on telly together cuddled up. It wasn't until an hour later I realised she'd passed away peacefully in her sleep with her arm around me. She looked so peaceful just like she was asleep and I can't seem to shake that image from my head.

- 2 months ago I was walking home from sixth form when I noticed a shadow in the bush I thought nothing of it until I saw a hand, I thought it was just kids playing a joke but it turned out that an elderly lady had fallen out of her bungalow and hit her head but she must have been there a while as she'd passed away by the time I'd managed to try and help.

- My youngest older brother (if that makes sense!) is at university and has nearly finished his first year, I miss him so much, I know people say this all the time but I really was close to him. I've never known a brother-sister bond like it, we'd do absolutely everything together and it killed me to see him go. I didn't want to show him I was upset so I kept it together, I wanted him to have the best time he could.

- My anxiety is getting worse and my family seriously don't understand, no matter how much I try explain they don't seem to get it. I have a very old-fashioned family when it comes down to beliefs of life. By beliefs I mean things like, they belief in 'hard graft' you get what you work for kind of thing. As much as I love them they all said to me "Natalie that is ridiculous, don't be so silly you aren't one of 'them'. It's all in your head you silly girl, just stop worrying. Go out and have fun I'm sure it's not that hard, I wish I'd had the chance to do what you can do when I was your age." My anxiety has got worse so quickly and I'm on a few medications and starting CBT & counselling soon maybe in a few weeks, but it's making me I'll and I'm getting worse because I'm scared of letting my family down.

- I have lost so much weight, find myself getting that on edge it's ridiculous, making myself physically sick worrying, trying to avoid people at sixth form who are caring and on top of all of this I'm trying to hide all this from my family because they do not believe in it and thinks its silly. I've tried telling them over and over but it gets me nowhere and makes me feel like I'm not worth anything.

But down to the situation I was explaining at the start is I really don't want anyone finding out about anything that's going on, it's going to make me look weak and I worry more when people know who could tell my family what's going on at any moment. With his wife being pregnant I don't want to stress him out or anything, I'm grateful for him caring and I think in time I would tell him but I presume he'll tell more important staff.

They do not know about the cancer or not being able to have children as I didn't want to let them down, I've been to all testings and results on my own, I think the cancer will be clear as they said they're just ruling it out to be certain on PCOS. I'm really worried my sport teacher is going to try and let more important staff something is wrong as I've been a little down in lessons given the situation. I'm quiet anyway so usually they don't notice but I've been day dreaming so bad just thinking about everything and getting anxious I think they've started to notice.

Please please help me :(

graciebaby
06-01-2013, 04:21 PM
Hi general worrier, I really feel for you, you have got so much goin on and at the age of 17 I think you have been so brave to come on to this forum and just talk about it, it's only natural that your full of anxiety and worry, I haven't really got much advice for you as I'm am really bad with anxiety at the minute but its just nice to know people are listening, a find my anxieties ease off just by reading other people go through the same type of things, although u seem to have had a pretty rough ride at the minute, you'll get through it, a think maybe talkin to your teacher might help, he seems concerned and by talkin to someone u trust takes a little weight of your shoulders,
Hope you start feeling better soon
😌

DustingMyselfOff
06-01-2013, 04:42 PM
Awwwwww, GW...... I wish I could just reach through the screen and hug you. I was going through something very similar when I was that age and had the same issues with family.... I could not let anyone know that I wasn't feeling well, physically or mentally. My father was very distant, just went to work in the factory, ate dinner, and went to sleep. Very little interaction with him. Felt like I was a nuisance and tried to stay out of his way. My two much older sisters were off doing things on their own, they didn't need a bratty little sister tagging along or complaining about my ailments. And my mother was a psychological wreck (who never learned to deal with it) and would scream and yell at me to not tell her anything because she might get upset about it. Oh, when I was 6 and was having facial tics, she would yell at me to stop it or they would put me in the crazy house and that I should stop embarrassing her. I got myself a part time job after school when I was 16 so I could save up money to take myself to doctors.

Anyway, enough about me.... just wanted to let you know that I can relate and I feel so badly for you. But the advantage is YOU are going to get to the bottom of this at an early age and have a full, happy life. I am 56 and just now starting to fix this. Good for you - do not give up!

Perhaps you could talk to a guidance counselor at school? Or if you really don't want anyone there to know about your issues, maybe find a therapist at a hospital who works on a sliding scale? If you don't have much money, they don't charge much, if anything.

I understand you not wanting to go to your family with this.... if it's like mine was it would only make things worse.

During the really rough times, download some guided meditations and do them a few times a day. Oh how I wish they had such things when I was young. There is much help out there for you - take advantage of it and nip this in the bud.

Good luck, and keep us posted.
Sue

GeneralWorrier
06-02-2013, 06:02 AM
Hi general worrier, I really feel for you, you have got so much goin on and at the age of 17 I think you have been so brave to come on to this forum and just talk about it, it's only natural that your full of anxiety and worry, I haven't really got much advice for you as I'm am really bad with anxiety at the minute but its just nice to know people are listening, a find my anxieties ease off just by reading other people go through the same type of things, although u seem to have had a pretty rough ride at the minute, you'll get through it, a think maybe talkin to your teacher might help, he seems concerned and by talkin to someone u trust takes a little weight of your shoulders,
Hope you start feeling better soon
dde0c

I usually hate talking to people, always keep myself to myself and just get on with it but my anxiety is getting really high recently I had to just spill I guess. I thought it would help a little but it hasn't so I'm back to square one again :( I've been a bit weary of telling him what's happening though as they don't know about my anxiety or anything that's going on at home so I don't want them to freak out or get other people involved. He is really caring and has told me lots of times not to think that he doesn't care because he does, he said he's always free if I ever needed to talk to anyone but I feel so bad to put it all on him, especially with his wife expecting a baby any minute. I suppose everything happens for a reason, just a little too much for me at the minute haha, thank you for replying :)