Internalizing others illnesses

[defmunel]

My cousin in law was just diagnosed with MS. She's in her early 30's.

A friend (58) was diagnosed with rectal melanoma. Just had surgery.

When I HEAR or READ about others illnesses, I lack compassion and sympathy for them. I just get scared. I think to myself, you're next! I internalize it all. Why can't I just see it for what it is, an not worry about me? I feel so narcissistic. They are truly going through something terrible, the one thing I fear. I should be loving and helpful towards them. Instead I want to cover my ears and run away!

I'm STILL fighting off the evil thoughts of health anxiety. This is such a challenge. I want to feel physically well, and mentally well. I put up a fight everyday when I wake up. I just want to SMILE AND LAUGH! I want to WORRY LESS. I want to ENJOY LIFE.

Why at age 29 am I so consumed by worrying about terminal illnesses? Statistics are such that I won't get any for quite some time. It doesn't run in my family so maybe that's why I'm scared. It's gotta start somewhere, so chances are it'll be me.

If you do believe in God, please help me with this. I'm always thinking that my worries are "signs" that God is telling me something. He's trying to prepare me for the worst. However, deep down I don't believe God WOULD do that.

Thanks for reading. And replying. :)

[sharacel91]

I have major health anxiety apart from I don't think about terminal illness I'm terrified I have a heart problem or gonna die from a heart attack soon it's awful so I really feel for you. Although I know I have anxiety I still get days where I'm thinking I'm going to die of a heart attack I get a little chest pain or palpertaions that will set me of for the rest of the day. I'm having a bad day today which sucks. Let hope things get better for all of us!!

[sharacel91]

Oh and I'm only 22 xx

[missmello]

I have health anxiety, and I'm 28. Although I don't feel like I'm constantly worried, its just when I get my anxiety symptoms I feel like theres something seriously wrong with me, they can't figure it out, and I'm going to die. It sounds so irrational to me when I'm thinking those thoughts.. and I constantly tell myself this.. but it is hard to believe it sometimes. I over analyze a lot in general, but I especially do it when my health is concerned. Heart palpitations.. I'm gonna have a heart attack. Headaches, I have a brain tumor or I'm gonna have a stroke. I go to worst case scenario instantly. I have a lump in my leg, which i try to rationalize it being from the one year I went snowboarding and fell down so much that its probably like scar tissue, but I fear its a tumor. Brought it up to my Dr. and she things its scar tissue, totally dismissed it. I'm still gonna have someone check it out though.

But anyway, I know its extremely difficult to turn your brain off and to stop the negative thoughts, but unfortunately I think that's just the way we were built. I've come to terms with the fact ill probably worry about the dumbest things for the rest of my life. I'm trying not to let it control my life though, and try to quickly dismiss those negative thoughts because the longer I stew in those bad thoughts, the more it affects me and the more I begin to believe it. It's all about how you react, I feel. And I tell myself all the time, there are people out there who are seriously suffering with horrible diseases and I'm over here panicking for no reason. Be thankful those tests all come back negative for you. That is something to be thankful for, right? Remember that.. we have many things to be thankful for every day, and you have a lot to look forward to still. Find happiness in every day. These are all things I try to remind myself.

[Willo1982]

Im 30 and suffer from health anxiety. I have good days and bad days. My anxiety has kicked up a notch in the past few months. I have been so stressed to the point where I have lost a fair few kilos... and guess what.. my anxiety is now trying to tell me that I have something seriously wrong with me due to the weight loss. I will admit I am finding it hard to believe that the weight loss is due to stress even though all blood work has come back normal. I have started seeing a psychologist again and yesterday I finally went back to the gym after a month even though im scared of losing more weight. I have to keep telling myself that I need to exercise in order to keep my anxiety in check. The mind is so powerful and scary but we have to really tell ourselves that we are going to be ok and that we can with willpower beat it. Stay strong and positive.

[Willo1982]

Im 30 and suffer from health anxiety. I have good days and bad days. My anxiety has kicked up a notch in the past few months. I have been so stressed to the point where I have lost a fair few kilos... and guess what.. my anxiety is now trying to tell me that I have something seriously wrong with me due to the weight loss. I will admit I am finding it hard to believe that the weight loss is due to stress even though all blood work has come back normal. I have started seeing a psychologist again and yesterday I finally went back to the gym after a month even though im scared of losing more weight. I have to keep telling myself that I need to exercise in order to keep my anxiety in check. The mind is so powerful and scary but we have to really tell ourselves that we are going to be ok and that we can with willpower beat it. Stay strong and positive.