intense anxiety causing an concerning irrational fear

[ame11iea]

This is quite difficult to explain as even I don't really understand it, and it sounds strange, but I have fear/anxiety about food/drink. I don't know where it's sprung from as I've never had any problems with eating and food before, and its not about weight loss or distorted body image. I suffer from an extremely agitated anxiety and subsequent depression, and it's gotten particularly bad in the last few months.

I think about how much food/water it took me to live this long, and how many more meals/water I'm going to have to eat and drink to keep on living. How many people are starving or dying of dehydration. How if I don't eat/can't eat I die; I'm totally dependent on it to survive. My body needs it as fuel to keep on working, and without it, it stops. I think about how if 3 weeks ago I'd stopped eating I'd be dead now. If 3 days ago I'd stopped drinking I'd be dead now. Every time I get hungry I feel fear rising up, knowing I'm going to have to eat again, and dreading the racing thoughts and anxiety that food now brings.

I pick the whole concept apart until I'm so fearful and anxious that my throat shuts and I can't eat, which only makes matters worse. I fear for weight loss and becoming underweight as my food intake decreases, and as I'm already petite. It gotten to the point now where I'm almost not aware of what I'm scared of, all I know is that it's food/water and I'm afraid. Its a complete irrational fear. I'm tearing myself apart with anxiety, it's like a run-away train I can't stop. Sometimes it makes me feel suicidal because I can't stand it. I want to be normal again. I'm on 10mg escitalopram at the moment, but surely I shouldn't be feeling like this on it. I feel scared and really alone :(

[missmello]

You should probably talk to your doctor about this and see if they think you should adjust your med.

You at least recognize that your fear is irrational.. that's the first step.

Are there any foods that you really enjoy eating? Maybe try starting from there..
Once you can finally bring yourself to start eating, are you okay? Or do you find yourself forcing it the whole time?
Think positively, like "this food is delicious and I am enjoying it"
It sounds like you are definitely overthinking. If you feel hungry, eat. It's as simple as that, and as simple as it should be.

Hope you feel better soon

[George]

The escitalopran takes about four weeks to kick in. Once the meds start working you will be able to control your thoughts. You will have to tell yourself to stop thinking the anxious thoughts and think of something else relaxing and pleasant. Try meditating and visualizing eating your favorite meal. It's takes a long time for nerves to heal. Have faith in your ability to heal yourself. Be patient, you can do it. Then allow this experience to build your confidence that you can manage things in the future.

[anxiousinatlanta]

Hey I have something similar. I have this crazy irrational fear of food. I fear that food I have been eating my whole entire life will suddenly cause me an allergic reaction. Because of this I only eat my food when I'm around other people such as my family or friends. I have read online that the worst allergic reactions happen a minute or seconds after contact so after a few minutes have passed I rejoice. It's so irrationally, but just know you aren't alone.

[ame11iea]

but with me I have literally no reason. no allergies to make me afraid, no fear of choking, no ibs, history of acid reflux, etc. I don't know why this clings to me so much. it makes me feel vulnerable and dependant, and very aware of my mortality. I can't seem to simplify it for what it really is. I think about it too much.

[anxiousinatlanta]

but with me I have literally no reason. no allergies to make me afraid, no fear of choking, no ibs, history of acid reflux, etc. I don't know why this clings to me so much. it makes me feel vulnerable and dependant, and very aware of my mortality. I can't seem to simplify it for what it really is. I think about it too much.

Yeah I feel the same way. It's complete irrational fear and that's all it is. It's hard to convince yourself it's just that but just keep trying and eventually it will help. I'm on my 3rd month of this awful thing and I'm already feeling 20 times better and Im starting to love life again!

[ame11iea]

my anxiety also has a fantastic habit of catastrophising everything. like I think; if I don't eat I'll feel more anxious cos I'm hungry, I'll end up having a panic attack, if this continues I'll lose weight that I can't afford to, I'll end up in hospital on a drip, I'll die, etc.

I wish I could just go back to how I was before all of this happened, I feel like I can't control anything, like I'm losing my mind. I'm at my wits end :(

[anxiousinatlanta]

my anxiety also has a fantastic habit of catastrophising everything. like I think; if I don't eat I'll feel more anxious cos I'm hungry, I'll end up having a panic attack, if this continues I'll lose weight that I can't afford to, I'll end up in hospital on a drip, I'll die, etc.

I wish I could just go back to how I was before all of this happened, I feel like I can't control anything, like I'm losing my mind. I'm at my wits end :(

Obviously anxiety is bad but let me to tell you I have those exact same thoughts. I spent some time in a mental hospital because my anxiety got pretty bad. i didnt fit in there at all very well. some kids had much worse problems. and i had bad nightmares about being a crazy patient. and now I get thoughts like what if you get angry, what if you're so angry you hurt someone, what if hurting turns into killing someone and then what if you spend the rest of your life in that mental hospital. Obviously I don't want to hurt and apparently if I really was insane I wouldn't be conscious of the fact. But I'm just saying I get those chain of event catastrophic thoughts so just know that it's normal!

[M.C]

I m very obsessed with my weight I keep a sharp eye on it I want to put on pounds and pounds because it means to me that I m healthy
I do feel sick quiet a lot and it annoys me
If I don't eat and drink enough I m gonna loose weight that means I ve cancer then I need to go to hospital,treatment ,surgery ,loose more weight and die.
It a vicious cycle which starts with a simple idea and ends with a catastrophe
It s normal to have thoughts like this when you suffer from anxiety
You exaggerate anything and everything!!!