Kaspar Põlluäär
04-14-2013, 03:49 PM
Hello everyone. I am a 19 year old European male who is sufferring from anxiety and I'm looking for some advice.
It all started a couple of years ago when I started to jolt back awake just before falling asleep because I had to take a deep breath in for whatever reason. I wasn't even out of breath. This occured very rarely, maybe once a month and only 2 times it was something more than me waking up from slumber. Once, when my brother was cooking, I had a very minor anxiety attack from all the aroma in the room. I was a little short of breath and quite afraid of what would happen. Still it turned out to be nothing and I could carry on with my life. My shortness of breath when sleeping never got any worse in terms of frequency. I still had it very rarely, maybe several times in one night but that was about it.
That was until about a month ago. My friends were smoking some "weed" and they persuaded me to join them, even though I felt hesitant to do so and regretted it immediately (not their fault though, in any way, I blame myself). The funny thing is, this wasn't my first time to try weed, I have tried it like 2 or 3 times before but I guess those were smaller doses and they never had any effect on me. That time though, I took a bigger puff of the joint and 10 minutes later, I regretted doing so. First, I felt it in my head, as it started from the back and made its way to the front. It felt as if a cloud covered my brain or something. Then my arms started feeling really heavy and that's when I started to panic a little. Then my tounge went numb and I was freaking out. I had a panic attack. From what I've heard it does to others, I guess mine was a little more tame but still, it scared me enough to call 911.
Ever since that night, my anxiety has gone worse. The week after, almost every night I started to feel heavy in my chest and falling asleep was a task, since I jolted back to conciousness with a big gasp for air. It was the same as those I had every so often a couple of years ago. Once, I even felt horrible throughout the whole day. The left side of my chest was feeling heavy and too sensitive, which made it really unconfortable for me. I almost had another panic attack just a week after the first one but my mother gave me some Validol, which made me feel good enough to go to sleep and awake feeling a little better the next day.
I'm sorry for my long text, but this is helping me a lot, getting it off my chest. Also, I think this is related to my hair loss. You see, the top part of my head has been thinning ever since I was about 16 or 17. No one else in my family has had any trouble with hair loss. Funny really, it's probably caused from stress and anxiety and it just causes more stress and anxiety when I think about it being a problem. It sucks really. I guess in the end, it all derived from my quite weak nerves. I mean that in a way, that whenever there's a fight near me or someone I don't know is scolding me (aside from teachers surprisingly), I get really anxious. Because of that, I've altered my personality enough so that I just try to not give a shit about things and avoid confrontations or any longer conversations really.
I'm sorry for the long text but I was feeling anxious and this really helped me, getting it off the chest. If anyone has any advice for me or wishes to ask any further questions, feel free to do so. I want to know more about this condition and is there a way I can live normally, without fear again.
It all started a couple of years ago when I started to jolt back awake just before falling asleep because I had to take a deep breath in for whatever reason. I wasn't even out of breath. This occured very rarely, maybe once a month and only 2 times it was something more than me waking up from slumber. Once, when my brother was cooking, I had a very minor anxiety attack from all the aroma in the room. I was a little short of breath and quite afraid of what would happen. Still it turned out to be nothing and I could carry on with my life. My shortness of breath when sleeping never got any worse in terms of frequency. I still had it very rarely, maybe several times in one night but that was about it.
That was until about a month ago. My friends were smoking some "weed" and they persuaded me to join them, even though I felt hesitant to do so and regretted it immediately (not their fault though, in any way, I blame myself). The funny thing is, this wasn't my first time to try weed, I have tried it like 2 or 3 times before but I guess those were smaller doses and they never had any effect on me. That time though, I took a bigger puff of the joint and 10 minutes later, I regretted doing so. First, I felt it in my head, as it started from the back and made its way to the front. It felt as if a cloud covered my brain or something. Then my arms started feeling really heavy and that's when I started to panic a little. Then my tounge went numb and I was freaking out. I had a panic attack. From what I've heard it does to others, I guess mine was a little more tame but still, it scared me enough to call 911.
Ever since that night, my anxiety has gone worse. The week after, almost every night I started to feel heavy in my chest and falling asleep was a task, since I jolted back to conciousness with a big gasp for air. It was the same as those I had every so often a couple of years ago. Once, I even felt horrible throughout the whole day. The left side of my chest was feeling heavy and too sensitive, which made it really unconfortable for me. I almost had another panic attack just a week after the first one but my mother gave me some Validol, which made me feel good enough to go to sleep and awake feeling a little better the next day.
I'm sorry for my long text, but this is helping me a lot, getting it off my chest. Also, I think this is related to my hair loss. You see, the top part of my head has been thinning ever since I was about 16 or 17. No one else in my family has had any trouble with hair loss. Funny really, it's probably caused from stress and anxiety and it just causes more stress and anxiety when I think about it being a problem. It sucks really. I guess in the end, it all derived from my quite weak nerves. I mean that in a way, that whenever there's a fight near me or someone I don't know is scolding me (aside from teachers surprisingly), I get really anxious. Because of that, I've altered my personality enough so that I just try to not give a shit about things and avoid confrontations or any longer conversations really.
I'm sorry for the long text but I was feeling anxious and this really helped me, getting it off the chest. If anyone has any advice for me or wishes to ask any further questions, feel free to do so. I want to know more about this condition and is there a way I can live normally, without fear again.