1Goofy1
03-06-2013, 04:29 AM
Hey All,
Just venting....lately have been having the worst time of it in years! Literally years!!!! I have tried every technique I have ever used and have just yesterday started a bit higher dose of celexa and I don't know how to cope.
I tell myself that it was like this in the beginning and I got through it so I can this time too but it is different this time. I feel like I am shutting down and I am afraid of everything and I am about at my wits end with all of this nonsense.
I go to the store and mutter to myself like the Rain Man the few things on my list until I can get them as fast as I can and get out of there. I drove across town to an estate sale the other day and had to pull over twice because I was freaking out over what I have no idea. I went down town to my Dr.s appt and thought I would treat myself to a manicure on the way home but had chewed all my nails off on the damn drive.
I used to confront my anxiety in a store by browsing around until I calmed down and faced my fears to sort of desensitize myself to things but I just can't do it lately. I get chest pains that are out of this world, eyes twitching like a mad woman, sweating, shaking, jaws hurting and in general just turn into a complete mess.
I have lost interest in my home as far as cooking and walking the dogs, I am only comfortable when I am on my stupid couch reading or crocheting like I am 80 years old.
I just want to be me again! I used to love to go, love to be active, love meeting new people, driving to new places, going somewhere just to go a browse around see new places and things and stores and now the thought of it scares the hell out of me.
Up until a few weeks or so ago I could get through things, not always easily but get through it. Now I just sit here.
I need a hair trim and have put it off for 6 weeks because I panic in the chair. something about sitting there and they put that cape around me I feel trapped and freak out.
Wow, just re-reading this, I am a mess and probably need a padded vacation.
If any of you have had times out of the blue this bad, how did you come out of it?
Just venting....lately have been having the worst time of it in years! Literally years!!!! I have tried every technique I have ever used and have just yesterday started a bit higher dose of celexa and I don't know how to cope.
I tell myself that it was like this in the beginning and I got through it so I can this time too but it is different this time. I feel like I am shutting down and I am afraid of everything and I am about at my wits end with all of this nonsense.
I go to the store and mutter to myself like the Rain Man the few things on my list until I can get them as fast as I can and get out of there. I drove across town to an estate sale the other day and had to pull over twice because I was freaking out over what I have no idea. I went down town to my Dr.s appt and thought I would treat myself to a manicure on the way home but had chewed all my nails off on the damn drive.
I used to confront my anxiety in a store by browsing around until I calmed down and faced my fears to sort of desensitize myself to things but I just can't do it lately. I get chest pains that are out of this world, eyes twitching like a mad woman, sweating, shaking, jaws hurting and in general just turn into a complete mess.
I have lost interest in my home as far as cooking and walking the dogs, I am only comfortable when I am on my stupid couch reading or crocheting like I am 80 years old.
I just want to be me again! I used to love to go, love to be active, love meeting new people, driving to new places, going somewhere just to go a browse around see new places and things and stores and now the thought of it scares the hell out of me.
Up until a few weeks or so ago I could get through things, not always easily but get through it. Now I just sit here.
I need a hair trim and have put it off for 6 weeks because I panic in the chair. something about sitting there and they put that cape around me I feel trapped and freak out.
Wow, just re-reading this, I am a mess and probably need a padded vacation.
If any of you have had times out of the blue this bad, how did you come out of it?