Guys, I am FRIGHTENED when I leave the house, will it get better as I continue to

[FordingTheWaters]

do so? :((

I just decided to go for a drive and to go get some chocolate from the store and it was fine at first, tho I was feeling uneasy, but when I was in the store I became nearly PETRIFIED. I felt like I was forgetting where I was, even though I knew all along where I was and why I was there, it's the strangest feeling, I just can't describe it. I felt as if I couldn't see a thing, yet I could see everything just fine. All these thoughts kept rushing into my head like

"What if I fall over in a few moments, what if I forget where I am, what if I lose my mind?"

and I saw this lady who i;ve been familiar with at that store for a while and all i could think was "she's gonna see you lose it, great"

... i was pretty good at keeping my cool and didn't run out of there or anything but when I got in my car I promptly left as fast as I could safely do so, and came back home. It's 11:06 here now. I think that was at like 10:30-10:45. I'm not trying to brag, but I'm a good looking guy and any time a girl looks at me in the store or something I think "Ha, if she knew she's looking at a crazy person". I hear that guys without girlfriends are more susceptible to anxiety, and yet I have a girlfriend and my anxiety is basically through the roof anyway.

Yesterday I went for a walk and skateboarded a bit and it was fun but when I got back home I had RACING thoughts and fears and I went into my room feeling crippled. My aunt had mental issues before she had a stroke, and I ask my mom a lot about her, because though she is disabled now, I related to her a LOT before it happened. We have a lot of similarities, thyroid issues, high metabolism, naturally exciteable/hyperactive, artistic inclinations. My mom assures me that she was a lot worse off than I have ever been and that while I seem perfect lucid, that I may be OCD.

I know I'm venting a lot here but I'm very very worried. I've had anxiety and panic for years but never like this. This is crippling... Whenever I'm calm, I'm worried I'm about to die of an underlying health issue and whenever I'm most anxious I'm worried I'm going to go crazy. The fears shift from mental to physical continously. And every new thing I do seems to trigger some new symptom. I have an appt. with my GP tomorrow and I REALLY wish he would sign papers recommending that I be admitted to a hospital (general, not psychiatric), because I'm fatigued all the time, weak, have tinnitus, dizzyness, and suspect adrenal insufficiency. I feel like I should be in the hospital for observation and would feel 1000 times better if I was. But until I'm diagnosed with something that's doubtful. My girlfriend and her mom, and nurse, suspect adrenal fatigue, but my GP thinks it's unlikely.

I admit, I have been housebound by this for weeks and am only now making a serious effort to get out of the house every day. Will the sheer panic begin to subside each day as I MAKE myself leave the house? Because tonight was terrifying. I want to try CBT, as fast as I can. I need to get my anxiety in check somehow because this is not a way to live. I'm not thinking of hurting myself or anything like that, I'm just desperate for healing.

Whoever reads this, thank you.

[parisorsteph]

I think your doing good by leaving the house. I had to start doing that myself because all I would do is sit in my apartment and have horrible "what if" thoughts so I started coming to my moms house which has helped a little but now I fear going home. I think it's because I live 45 miles away from all my family and it's starting to take its toll on me.. But I do think that as you continue to go outside your home or comfort level it will slowly start to heal and become not as scary or anxiety producing. I think it's awesome that you even try to do it because that's the hardest part! Keep it up

[NixonRulz]

Your story is horrible and so familiar.
I think you are doing the right thing by continuing to leave your house.
One thing that I found really helpful: Instead of going out and finding that you were able to do it without panic, go out of the house and welcome it and wait for the panic to stop before leaving or returning home.
You have lived with this long enough to know that all of the "What if" questions never happened and if by some chance one or two did, nobody was probably aware of it besides you.
All of those thoughts are symptoms of anxiety. Becasue your aunt had those issues does not mean you will. My great aunt was institutionalized from it back in the40's when on one had a clue what is was.
Your thoughts race because you are taking them as reality when you are just experiencing symptoms which in turn makes the cycle start with the physical symptoms.
20 year survivor of anxiety and will never say it is cured. Still get the panicky feelings and the physical symptoms often sometimes and sometimes not for a few weeks.
But I have completely accepted that this is who I am, nobodys fault.
I have accepted the feelings of panic as symptoms of anxiety and the quickjly go away.
I promose you it will get better. Come to terms with who you are. Don't try to keep a girlfriend becasue you think it is safer.!
There is no place or item that is "safe". Live your life. You will not turn out to be in any way a freak.
Anxiety is scary as hell. But again I will tell you that it doesnt cripple me anymore. Go on vacations, go to events, hell I go everywhere. Especially the places that used to trigger attacks.
Only in the last 2 years have I completely accepted and often laugh about my symptoms.
Places like this and information that wasnt available to me for years slowed my progress.
Fortunatel, with understandinga nd acceptance, you can be done with this by this Friday.
Oh, in my 40's now but I used to skateboard as a semi pro for Atlantic when I was 14 and 15. Saw the best in the business at many tournaments including the indoor bowl at Cherry Hill.. Alva, Perralta, Both Albas, Cabalera (sp) and several of the Z boys after they went their seperate ways.
Had symptoms of anxiety then too but was too dumb to know what it was!
You are fine. Just accept that. Seriously.

[FordingTheWaters]

Your story is horrible and so familiar.
I think you are doing the right thing by continuing to leave your house.
One thing that I found really helpful: Instead of going out and finding that you were able to do it without panic, go out of the house and welcome it and wait for the panic to stop before leaving or returning home.
You have lived with this long enough to know that all of the "What if" questions never happened and if by some chance one or two did, nobody was probably aware of it besides you.
All of those thoughts are symptoms of anxiety. Becasue your aunt had those issues does not mean you will. My great aunt was institutionalized from it back in the40's when on one had a clue what is was.
Your thoughts race because you are taking them as reality when you are just experiencing symptoms which in turn makes the cycle start with the physical symptoms.
20 year survivor of anxiety and will never say it is cured. Still get the panicky feelings and the physical symptoms often sometimes and sometimes not for a few weeks.
But I have completely accepted that this is who I am, nobodys fault.
I have accepted the feelings of panic as symptoms of anxiety and the quickjly go away.
I promose you it will get better. Come to terms with who you are. Don't try to keep a girlfriend becasue you think it is safer.!
There is no place or item that is "safe". Live your life. You will not turn out to be in any way a freak.
Anxiety is scary as hell. But again I will tell you that it doesnt cripple me anymore. Go on vacations, go to events, hell I go everywhere. Especially the places that used to trigger attacks.
Only in the last 2 years have I completely accepted and often laugh about my symptoms.
Places like this and information that wasnt available to me for years slowed my progress.
Fortunatel, with understandinga nd acceptance, you can be done with this by this Friday.
Oh, in my 40's now but I used to skateboard as a semi pro for Atlantic when I was 14 and 15. Saw the best in the business at many tournaments including the indoor bowl at Cherry Hill.. Alva, Perralta, Both Albas, Cabalera (sp) and several of the Z boys after they went their seperate ways.
Had symptoms of anxiety then too but was too dumb to know what it was!
You are fine. Just accept that. Seriously.

I did it again. Went out for a drive, and I can't say it was any less terrifying. I'm back home now, 10:41pm and I'm so dizzy I feel like I may faint, my arms are tingly and numb. Wow what a crazy experience.

But one thing I'm noticing is that each time I do this I do NOT pass out, I do NOT lose it, and I'm always perfectly aware what I'm doing, even when I'm panicked.

I pray and pray some more than it will get better each time I force myself to do this.

[laurandisorder]

And you know what, my dear? If you do feel like you are going to faint or something terrible is about to happen you can always just ask someone for help!

Say you tell the lady in the shop you feel a bit dizzy and need to sit down - what's she going to do? Judge you? Think you're going crazy-crazy ca ca? Heck no! If you're on the road and feeling really bad - I find anxiety whilst driving can be a bit dangerous - especially tunnel vision and the numbness - then pull over and call someone - a relative, a trusted friend and tell them the same. You're feeling really dizzy and faint and having anxiety. No one is going to laugh or point or make fun of you!

And your circumstances are so similar to mine. I could only leave the house loaded to the gills on Valium and driving!? Forget it!? It took me months to work through, but guess what? Now I don't let it stop me; I work, I live, I go to concerts, I shop, I exercise, I drive. Four years ago, I thought I'd never leave my freaking house again and was going crazy from boredom, anxiety and panic!

So keep pushing yourself! What's the worst that's going to happen? You get a bit dizzy and feel funny, heck even if you happened to pass out (which is very difficult, if not impossible from a panic attack), you aren't going to be left in the shop or on the side of the street just lying there! You're going to be ok and you are doing the right things. Just challenge yourself a little every day and celebrate every little success!

[PanicCured]

If you know you have anxiety, and that is what you have been diagnosed with, then always remember that. I was scared of leaving my home too. I know exactly how you feel. It;s like you are a time bomb about to go off and leaving your safe zone will trigger it. You have to use your WILL to override it. Once I left my safe friend and went shopping on my own and I felt so trapped in the store I put the cart down and headed out and had a massive panic attack inside. It was like I couldn't stay inside but I couldn't leave either. An ambulance was called even in front of a crowd. So that is the worst case that can happen. And now, I laugh at it.

Try and not fear the Panic Attacks, even though they are unbearably horrible, just don't fear them. Little by little face your fears. Go to your fears. If you have a freak out, then allow them to wash over you and pass. We have all been there.

[kelsta]

If you know you have anxiety, and that is what you have been diagnosed with, then always remember that. I was scared of leaving my home too. I know exactly how you feel. It;s like you are a time bomb about to go off and leaving your safe zone will trigger it. You have to use your WILL to override it. Once I left my safe friend and went shopping on my own and I felt so trapped in the store I put the cart down and headed out and had a massive panic attack inside. It was like I couldn't stay inside but I couldn't leave either. An ambulance was called even in front of a crowd. So that is the worst case that can happen. And now, I laugh at it.

Try and not fear the Panic Attacks, even though they are unbearably horrible, just don't fear them. Little by little face your fears. Go to your fears. If you have a freak out, then allow them to wash over you and pass. We have all been there.

How do u face yours fears?? I've tried but it doesn't work for me... Help !!!!

[PanicCured]

How do u face yours fears?? I've tried but it doesn't work for me... Help !!!!

You have to use your WILL. You have to save yourself. The idea of a Safe Zone or Safe Place is an illusion. If you understand what a panic attack is, how it is caused and that it can't harm you, then the worst that can happen is you freak out and do the panic attack dance that everyone here has experienced way too many times. Your mind is playing tricks on you. Just because your thoughts tell you something doesn't mean its true or real, no matter how real they seem. Use your WILL to override it and learn how to handle a panic attack better, so it dissipates. My method is in the sticky thread above. There are other methods, but that is what worked for me. You have to retrain your brain.

[kelsta]

Thanks I will give it a go !! I have to...

[daisy37]

I am can relate to your story. I too have the same thoughts and fears... When I go out. It comes out of no where and they are so real and scary. I always thought anxiety wasn't a real condition. I just thought all my feelings (mental and physical) was just me going crazy. However, it's just the disorder we have. Some people have allergies, we have anxiety. Anyway I am taking lorazepam for my condition. It does help me a lot in times of panic but its just a temporary fix. I think that going out and really facing your fears slowly.... is a great way on training the mind on how to handle the panic attacks and bad thoughts.

I too have thoughts of dying. I think I have all these horrible diseases and run to the ER for anything. After they tell me I'm perfect I still don't believe them. Lol it's pretty silly. Supermarkets are bad for me. I get hot flashes, tunnel vision, weird lump in my throat and my stomach starts getting butterflies. Like if something horrible is about to happen. But as time goes by I push myself to face all fears. Because life is short and anxiety seems like its really gonna harm you but it doesn't.

I have learned that support is important. Especially when your at the grocery store, and need some help shaking off those feelings. I call my mom or sister to talk myself out of it. I feel so out of body that hearing their voices brings me back down. I've been suffering from this from childhood and I feel it gets worse with age because of changes in life and stress. But accepting it is the first step. I used to ignore it and blame everything but anxiety. It's a lifetime struggle but reading your post makes me feel better to know I am not alone. one thing I am doing to face a huge fear is flying to Chicago in July. I cant let these fears trap me in my house forever. Even though I may get those panic attacks and horrid thoughts, I know they pass and hope to still have fun!!!!

Good luck:)

[FordingTheWaters]

I am can relate to your story. I too have the same thoughts and fears... When I go out. It comes out of no where and they are so real and scary. I always thought anxiety wasn't a real condition. I just thought all my feelings (mental and physical) was just me going crazy. However, it's just the disorder we have. Some people have allergies, we have anxiety. Anyway I am taking lorazepam for my condition. It does help me a lot in times of panic but its just a temporary fix. I think that going out and really facing your fears slowly.... is a great way on training the mind on how to handle the panic attacks and bad thoughts.

I too have thoughts of dying. I think I have all these horrible diseases and run to the ER for anything. After they tell me I'm perfect I still don't believe them. Lol it's pretty silly. Supermarkets are bad for me. I get hot flashes, tunnel vision, weird lump in my throat and my stomach starts getting butterflies. Like if something horrible is about to happen. But as time goes by I push myself to face all fears. Because life is short and anxiety seems like its really gonna harm you but it doesn't.

I have learned that support is important. Especially when your at the grocery store, and need some help shaking off those feelings. I call my mom or sister to talk myself out of it. I feel so out of body that hearing their voices brings me back down. I've been suffering from this from childhood and I feel it gets worse with age because of changes in life and stress. But accepting it is the first step. I used to ignore it and blame everything but anxiety. It's a lifetime struggle but reading your post makes me feel better to know I am not alone. one thing I am doing to face a huge fear is flying to Chicago in July. I cant let these fears trap me in my house forever. Even though I may get those panic attacks and horrid thoughts, I know they pass and hope to still have fun!!!!

Good luck:)


I went for a little drive out to a neighbouring village (i live just outside a large city) and it was scary... I was plagued by constant "Am I about to pass out" "Am I about to start thinking I'm somewhere else" thoughts. But I got home ok. The whole time I didn't feel like myself, but I at least enjoyed the scenery. It only gets slightly less scary each time, but I'm sure eventually it will have to change.

My doc says I should start taking walks instead of driving tho, because he doesnt want me to have panic attacks while driving my car. I agree.