How Many More Panic Attacks Will You Have...

[PanicCured]

...until you realize it's just a panic attack?

There has to be a limit, doesn't there? Doesn't there have to be a point were you figure it out? How many ER visits will it take? How many times will you succumb to your fears before you eventually see it's just anxiety and a panic attack?

[FordingTheWaters]

...until you realize it's just a panic attack?

There has to be a limit, doesn't there? Doesn't there have to be a point were you figure it out? How many ER visits will it take? How many times will you succumb to your fears before you eventually see it's just anxiety and a panic attack?

It's hard to say. My problem is that while the rational part of me tells me that everything is fine and that I have nothing to be afraid of, there's always that "what if" in the back of my mind. What if's are beyond debilitating to people with panic disorder or anxiety because possibilities are in theory, endless. You can say "what if" until you drive yourself crazy. What if a plane crashes right into my house? What if I choke on a popcorn kernal and die the next time I'm at the movies? What if I get a rare disease? I can't tell you how many times my what if's have held me back from getting better.

One thing that I am trying to get myself to realise is that virtually everything I've feared as a result of my anxiety has not come to pass. If all my fears had happened I'd have died years ago. We need to tell ourselves "If that really was gonna happen, it probably already would have..."

We've all, at some time or another, felt frustrated, when people who don't have anxiety tell us that all we have to do to get rid of it is to "...just stop thinking about it." We feel like if it were that easy, we'd have done it. After all, who on Earth WANTS to live like how we do?

The biggest problem is not that it's more complicated than that (indeed it is), it's that listening to the rational part of you is so much easier said than done. Believe me, this drives me crazy. I've constantly told myself "You're clearly just fine. If you had tests done in the ER and was fine two days ago why on Earth would you not be fine now?" but I've still somehow eluded this type of common sense. I think it's simply that adrenaline rush that gives us that sensation that trouble is brewing. Furthermore, we as humans tend to continue in whatever behaviour or mindset we've been in all along. It takes time to change habits.

I was at the ER last night, for the fifth time in the past 6 months. This time I was not having a panic attack at all, though. I was having what felt like legitimate trouble breathing. They took x-rays of my lungs and did blood work and I appear to be fine. I had not slept in days so when I went home I slept for a long time. Even that sleep was fragmented. It would seem I'm so chalk full of anxiety that it's gonna take some time to start calming down substantially. And low and behold, I am breathing better today than I was yesterday. Anxiety can do a lot of things to how you feel.

I'm not sorry that I had to go to the ER once again. It is their job to make sure you're ok and I am paying PLENTY for the medical care I receive. I waited nearly two hours just to be seen, drinking cold water and splashing it on my face just to stay awake. Since the most serious cases are always rushed in immediately anyway, nobody had to go without care because of me. I had what felt like a real symptom. I think it's very important for those of us with anxiety not to beat ourselves up because we're trying to protect our health. It's far better to think something's wrong and find out you're ok, than to think you're fine and find out you're not.

But it's also important to keep track of how you feel. I think in doing so, you''ll get a more acute sense of what your body is doing. It's not easy, but it can be done. I feel I've made progress in this regard.

I've had a much better day today than I've had in WEEKS. I feel like I'm on the road to healing. Will my problems go away overnight? No. But the sooner we accept that, the closer we'll be to living the lives we want to live.

Good luck.

[bajablue]

Nothing makes me more angry than being treated like my pain is less than the guy with the broken arm. I used to pray for something that could be seen on an X-Ray just so I could say - see, look how hurt I am. I wish they had Anxiety X-Rays. It angered me a bit to hear that you waited so long to be seen FTW (my short name for you). Your pain, my pain, Wearys pain, all of us here have pain just as bad as most the others in an ER. Where are our advocates? Where are the ribbons people wear for us - like breast cancer or other afflictions? Because we suffer the invisible - the seldom spoken of - we so often suffer alone. Good news is that it is incredibly better than 25 years ago when I was originally diagnosed. I spent my time in ERs back then too. You got me going on something that has bothered me for a long time.

[FordingTheWaters]

Nothing makes me more angry than being treated like my pain is less than the guy with the broken arm. I used to pray for something that could be seen on an X-Ray just so I could say - see, look how hurt I am. I wish they had Anxiety X-Rays. It angered me a bit to hear that you waited so long to be seen FTW (my short name for you). Your pain, my pain, Wearys pain, all of us here have pain just as bad as most the others in an ER. Where are our advocates? Where are the ribbons people wear for us - like breast cancer or other afflictions? Because we suffer the invisible - the seldom spoken of - we so often suffer alone. Good news is that it is incredibly better than 25 years ago when I was originally diagnosed. I spent my time in ERs back then too. You got me going on something that has bothered me for a long time.

Yes! I know what you mean!

At the same time I do feel bad at times, because I've been in there and seen old people who appear to have serious problems. There was one time where I was rushed right in because I was having so much chest pain that I was convinced I was having a heart attack.

A lot of people who work in the ER are not sympathetic to anxiety sufferers because most of them don't have anxiety themselves and are older. Anxiety disorders have gotten more attention in recent years and disproportionately seem to affect the younger generation.

I was treated very well last night, though.

[timeismoney]

At Paniccured,ftw, and bajablue everything i just read was great stuff

[timeismoney]

...................,,

[trinidiva]

Yes! I know what you mean!

At the same time I do feel bad at times, because I've been in there and seen old people who appear to have serious problems. There was one time where I was rushed right in because I was having so much chest pain that I was convinced I was having a heart attack.

A lot of people who work in the ER are not sympathetic to anxiety sufferers because most of them don't have anxiety themselves and are older. Anxiety disorders have gotten more attention in recent years and disproportionately seem to affect the younger generation.

I was treated very well last night, though.

Actually the last time I was in the ER for a severe panic attack, the nurse I had was a Godsend. It was because she had suffered with anxiety for many years and had in recent years, gotten a handle on it. As I laid on the stretcher in the ER, crying my eyes out, she pulled up a chair, and spent the entire time talking to me. She even walked me to my car after I got discharged.
I agree with the earlier statement that ,I think, just like everyone else, people (nurses included) can try to understand, but unless they have actually experienced the pain of anxiety, they aren't going to fully be able to embrace just how crippling anxiety can be. They are going to categorize the issue as non emergency and we will normally get placed at the bottom of the list. I agree, its not right.

[PanicCured]

Bajablue what an absurd reply! At the ER you are just freaking out while others are really in a REAL Life-threatening situation. How unbelievabely rediculosu are you? "Nothing makes me more angry than being treated like my pain is less than the guy with the broken arm"
His arm is in real pain and needs a cast immediately. You are just freaking out with imaginary pain!

MY GOD! I can't believe what I am reading!