dreamdreamdream
02-24-2013, 03:31 AM
Dear Stranger,
Tonight I arrived at one of the darkest moments I've come to since high school. I got into a fight with my friends over what I felt was an extremely racist comment that I could not abide. A person who I've considered extremely dear to me left the conversation and when I approached him to discuss the situation he yelled at me that he didn't want to discuss it.
I now understand that there is no person who will understand the situation in which I find myself on any given night. This is a fiction I maintained and it was not fair to my friends to expect them to be totally understanding and I'm not sure how I'll adjust the relationship I have with the people around me.
The thank you I want to extend is to the people, and one unnamed person in particular at the Suicide Prevention Hotline. I sobbed openly into the phone and told you everything, you were honest but not hurtful to me. (Even though it hurt a little to hear the truth). We talked for 15 or 30 minutes, I cannot be sure of the time exactly. And while at the beginning of our conversation I could not have answered this way, by the time you actually asked me "Are you having suicidal thoughts?" I could honestly answer no. Before I talked to you stranger I could not have said I wasn't thinking about ending it. That I didn't feel more alone, marooned on a island by my friends, my lover, and my family, than I ever have in my entire life.
There's a big transition in my life right now, stranger. You said as much. But I'm not afraid anymore. Again I'm not sure how I'll be able to handle what is a huge change in the relationships I've relied on for a long time. But thank you so much. You saved my life tonight, stranger.
I'll never know who you are, so I want to tell everyone who reads this: If you work for, or know someone who works for a group dedicated to fighting suicidal urges I want you to know or to tell them this story. What you do is beautiful. You saved my life. You are a hero.
I don't know what life will be like tomorrow. I imagine it will be weird. But what is important is that the person who saved my life tonight is part of my support group. I might not have insurance, but I have the greatest support group ever, the human race. And by some chance you recognize my message here, I want you to know how much good you did tonight. You pulled me from crisis. You saved a life.
Thank you,
-A
Tonight I arrived at one of the darkest moments I've come to since high school. I got into a fight with my friends over what I felt was an extremely racist comment that I could not abide. A person who I've considered extremely dear to me left the conversation and when I approached him to discuss the situation he yelled at me that he didn't want to discuss it.
I now understand that there is no person who will understand the situation in which I find myself on any given night. This is a fiction I maintained and it was not fair to my friends to expect them to be totally understanding and I'm not sure how I'll adjust the relationship I have with the people around me.
The thank you I want to extend is to the people, and one unnamed person in particular at the Suicide Prevention Hotline. I sobbed openly into the phone and told you everything, you were honest but not hurtful to me. (Even though it hurt a little to hear the truth). We talked for 15 or 30 minutes, I cannot be sure of the time exactly. And while at the beginning of our conversation I could not have answered this way, by the time you actually asked me "Are you having suicidal thoughts?" I could honestly answer no. Before I talked to you stranger I could not have said I wasn't thinking about ending it. That I didn't feel more alone, marooned on a island by my friends, my lover, and my family, than I ever have in my entire life.
There's a big transition in my life right now, stranger. You said as much. But I'm not afraid anymore. Again I'm not sure how I'll be able to handle what is a huge change in the relationships I've relied on for a long time. But thank you so much. You saved my life tonight, stranger.
I'll never know who you are, so I want to tell everyone who reads this: If you work for, or know someone who works for a group dedicated to fighting suicidal urges I want you to know or to tell them this story. What you do is beautiful. You saved my life. You are a hero.
I don't know what life will be like tomorrow. I imagine it will be weird. But what is important is that the person who saved my life tonight is part of my support group. I might not have insurance, but I have the greatest support group ever, the human race. And by some chance you recognize my message here, I want you to know how much good you did tonight. You pulled me from crisis. You saved a life.
Thank you,
-A