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Soundguy1000
02-23-2013, 05:02 PM
Anxiety is not a new thing too me, but its never been too this Extreme! I lost my brother a little over a year ago unexpectedly.. He had always been my Angel thru trouble.. Always there for me since I was a kid.... It killed me!!, but I was strong and there for the fam as he had been for me! 6 months later, I lost my best friend in a tragic car accident.. Turned into double duty as far as grieving goes... I then stoodby as my GF's dad quickly, Thank GOD, passed from Liver failure.. I literally pealed her off of him at the hospice and carried her out.. Long story, not so short, it's all been very traumatic!! It's all been a bit much,obviously,. I go thru counseling, my docs regularly, and continue to fight everyday!! My doc prescribed meds, Ativan being the daily course, which I've been very responsible with as i dont like taking pills. My GF just dumped me per " you have an RX prob"..... I'm terribly hurt!! as I'm just trying too get thru my days with all the Panic Attacks that now come with it.. I know it's a ramble, but its been ALOT!! ... Guess I'm just lookin for some thoughts here.. Thanks!!

weary
02-23-2013, 07:02 PM
Soundguy1000- I am so sorry for all the loss you have suffered. Reading this brought tears to my eyes, so much loss for one person to handle. I don't know if there are really any words to make the pains of loss go away or to try and settle the anxiety and panic attacks, I have too lost some very important people in my life at 26 I buried my best friend which was so hard because he too was always there for me. I know the pain and I wish I could say it will go away but sometimes it is always there. We sometimes allow the deaths of others to feed our fears and there is a few ways to deal with it.m
1) you can either allow the anxiety to win or you can look in the mirror everyday and tell it " you will not beat me"
2) find meditation I find it helps me escape to a peaceful place.
3) take this forum with you everyday learn from others - we all suffer the something's and what one does can maybe help another and then you too will be able to help another when you find what works best for you.

This forum and chat room have been amazing for me and while I am new to the forum by only a week my family can see the change in me I laugh more talk more and have a bigger presence in the house instead of hiding.

We are all here for you to help and support you even though we maybe suffering to we all work together to help one another.

May your family and friends rest in peace and may you find the strength and courage to beat the feelings you have. Stay positive and strong

bajablue
02-23-2013, 07:23 PM
You may have a friend problem if they are not sensitive enough to respect that you are in treatment, under a doctors care, battling daily and are doing the best you can. One thing I would say is - taking a medicine is a very private thing. Do not share that with anyone who is not "safe"; meaning someone who will support you unconditionally.
I take Ativan on an as needed basis when I experience a flare up of anxiety. The last six weeks or so has been one of those times. I have days when I do not take any, others where I take one every 6 or 8 hours. I give myself permission to do what I have to; to overcome a moment or a day of pain. I have told others this on this site - a Doctor once told me, because I was having guilt about leaning on medicine during a rough patch - he said "would you withhold or have guilt about giving your child a medicine that relieved their pain/discomfort/etc? Of course not - so why treat yourself otherwise?

Soundguy1000
02-23-2013, 07:40 PM
Thank you both so much... Weary, the fact that it brought tears to your eyes helped me let my tears flow again.. It has been FAR from easy, and most tell me I need to be stronger, when all I wanna do is rest my head and let it out!! And Thank you Baja.. I do have a friend problem. being that they aren't true friends... .. beginning to find true friends.. Again thank you both... I'll say this... It's sad and sucky!!

weary
02-23-2013, 07:44 PM
Soundguy1000- know that you have friends that you can trust on this forum because we suffer the same as you do some people either get it or they don't we here on this forum get it and we understand it because we live it. I hope things will get easier for you. And I hope to chat with you again soon

Soundguy1000
02-23-2013, 07:58 PM
Thank you again, so very Grateful!! My "friends" and Ex have never been so understanding... I shake my head at that.. I can find comfort in moments, yet years of "friendships" I can find none.

weary
02-23-2013, 08:11 PM
In time you will but you have to know who to trust i call these my safe people the accept me for who I am