Making Steps

[PhoenixStorm]

Found out yesterday that I can get a grant to see a doctor through a relief program. I'm really nervous about talking to someone.. My mom said she'd go in with me for the first couple of minutes if it'll make it easier for me, she really wants me to go. but knowing I'm going to be facing this is making me really anxious, nervous, scared, embarrassed,,... the list goes on and on... my palms are sweating now just thinking about thinking about it... lol. And i clean when I'm really nervous too.. so my house is super clean.. I mean I cleaned things that hadn't been cleaned in months just to keep myself busy. I just want to worry normally, stress normally, be normal! I've been so messed up lately I think my anxiety is even confused, started having heart palpitation which i don't think I've had or worried about in years... And I'm so distracted and can't focus which doesn't usually happen when I'm super energetic cleaning lady... but I've gotten up from my computer desk 3 times already while writing this... I just feel lost again........ Every time I look up at the sky... it starts to rain

[AnxietyInstituteSA]

You are so brave to seek help for your issues, even though its really frightening. It sounds like you're a fighter and will do whatever it takes to improve your life. Good luck with your appointment, and hopefully your clinician can help guide you through the recovery process:)

www.anxietyinstitutesa.com

[jessed03]

I know it's been said a lot on here, but what really helped me was writing down a short note, that I could hand to my doctor, explaining my problems. I know I got reeeeeeeally nervous at doctor surgeries, and my plan of what to say would always go right out the window, and I'd end up saying something pretty pointless. I'd usually spend the whole day rehearsing, worrying if my point would be understood properly, and actually get really worked up. The idea of having this perfectly worded drafted piece of paper in my pocket was very reassuring, and got rid of all those "What if it all goes wrong" worries. The humour it brings me now - looking back :)

I'd say the way you feel now is normal... considering the circumstances of the condition! I think most of the people here, felt something similar when going to the doctors. I think I cried 3 times before, never got a wink of sleep, and tapped my feet so much in the car on the way, that I could have pulled a Fred Flinstone, cut out the bottom of the car and ran us there!! hehe

You're welcome to come round to my place any time... I live far away, but you'd never run out of things to clean :D!

When is your appt, do you know? The journey of a thousand miles is beginning :)

[PhoenixStorm]

I know it's been said a lot on here, but what really helped me was writing down a short note, that I could hand to my doctor, explaining my problems. I know I got reeeeeeeally nervous at doctor surgeries, and my plan of what to say would always go right out the window, and I'd end up saying something pretty pointless. I'd usually spend the whole day rehearsing, worrying if my point would be understood properly, and actually get really worked up. The idea of having this perfectly worded drafted piece of paper in my pocket was very reassuring, and got rid of all those "What if it all goes wrong" worries. The humour it brings me now - looking back :)

I'd say the way you feel now is normal... considering the circumstances of the condition! I think most of the people here, felt something similar when going to the doctors. I think I cried 3 times before, never got a wink of sleep, and tapped my feet so much in the car on the way, that I could have pulled a Fred Flinstone, cut out the bottom of the car and ran us there!! hehe

You're welcome to come round to my place any time... I live far away, but you'd never run out of things to clean :D!

When is your appt, do you know? The journey of a thousand miles is beginning :)

We haven't set a date yet still trying to find a doc in my area that works with the program I am in.

If you pay airfare I'll come clean your house :) except I've never flown before and am scared.. but I think that's the one fear I could conquer quick if it meant traveling

I want to see a doctor and I've been pretty much begging for help but now that its going to happen its like O.O what did I get myself into.. now i'm going to have to face this instead of sitting in my nice comfortable hole I've dug myself into... :/ The note thing might be my trick.. I really never thought about it.. I do it when I go see my Family Doc so I don't forget anything I want to ask.. but it seriously would be a book and not a note.. I've been through some messed up stuff and been dealing with this for what seems like my whole life.. I don't ever remember being "normal".. well when I was an active alcoholic.. but i don't really remember that either..

[PhoenixStorm]

You are so brave to seek help for your issues, even though its really frightening. It sounds like you're a fighter and will do whatever it takes to improve your life. Good luck with your appointment, and hopefully your clinician can help guide you through the recovery process:)

www.anxietyinstitutesa.com

Thank you very much. I've been knocked down so much but always had the strength to stand up.. it always makes me think of that quote "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass it's about learning to dance in the rain" ... Life is a storm.. you can run and hide, you can stand there and get wet, or you can dance in the rain! :) Also kinda like my name.. Phoenix Storm.. no matter what.. I will rise through the ashes..!